“What’s your name?” she asked.
“Richard. Richard Mayhew. Dick.” She nodded, as if she were committing it to memory. The doorbell rang. Richard looked at the mess in the bathroom, and the girl, and wondered how it would look to an outside observer. Such as, for example . . . “Oh Lord,” he said, realizing the worst. “I bet it’s Jess. She’s going to kill me.” Damage control. Damage control. “Look,” he told the girl. “You wait in here.”
He shut the door of the bathroom behind him and walked down the hall. He opened the front door, and breathed a huge and quite heartfelt sigh of relief. It wasn’t Jessica. It was—what? Mormons? Jehovah’s Witnesses? The police? He couldn’t tell. There were two of them, at any rate.
They wore black suits, which were slightly greasy, slightly frayed, and even Richard, who counted himself among the sartorially dyslexic, felt there was something odd about the cut of the coats. They were the kind of suits that might have been made by a tailor two hundred years ago who had had a modern suit described to him but had never actually seen one. The lines were wrong, and so were the grace notes.
A fox and a wolf, thought Richard, involuntarily. The man in front, the fox, was a little shorter than Richard. He had lank, greasy hair, of an unlikely orange color, and a pallid complexion; as Richard opened the door, he smiled, widely, and just a fraction too late, with teeth that looked like an accident in a graveyard. “A good morrow to you, good sir,” he said, “on this fine and beautiful day.”
“Ah. Hello,” said Richard.
“We are conducting a personal enquiry of a delicate nature as it were, door to door. Do you mind if we come in?”
“Well, it’s not very convenient right now,” said Richard. Then he asked, “Are you with the police?” The second of the visitors, a tall man, the one he had thought of as a wolf, his gray and black hair cut bristle-short, stood a little behind his friend, holding a stack of photocopies to his chest. He had said nothing until this moment—just waited, huge and impassive. Now he laughed, once, low and dirtily. There was something unhealthy about that laugh.
“The police? Alas,” said the smaller man, “we cannot claim that felicity. A career in law and order, although indubitably enticing, was not inscribed on the cards Dame Fortuna dealt my brother and me. No, we are merely private citizens. Allow me to make introductions. I am Mister Croup, and this gentleman is my brother, Mister Vandemar.”
They did not look like brothers. They did not look like anything Richard had seen before. “Your brother?” asked Richard. “Shouldn’t you have the same name?”
“I am impressed. What a brain, Mister Vandemar. Keen and incisive isn’t the half of it. Some of us are so sharp,” he said as he leaned in closer to Richard, went up on tiptoes into Richard’s face, “we could just cut ourselves.” Richard took an involuntary step backwards. “Can we come inside?” asked Mr. Croup.
“What do you want?”
Mr. Croup sighed, in what he obviously imagined was a rather wistful manner. “We are looking for our sister,” he explained. “A wayward child, willful and headstrong, who has close to broken our poor dear widowed mother’s heart.”
“Ran away,” explained Mr. Vandemar, quietly. He thrust a photocopied sheet into Richard’s hands. “She’s a little . . . funny,” he added, and then he twirled one finger next to his temple in the universal gesture to indicate mental incapacity.
Richard looked down at the paper. It said:
HAVE YOU SEEN THIS GIRL?
Beneath that was a photocopy-gray photograph of a girl who looked to Richard like a cleaner, longer-haired version of the young lady he had left in his bathroom.
Under that it said:
ANSWERS TO THE NAME OF DOREEN. BITES AND KICKS. RUN AWAY. TELL US IF YOU SAW HER. WANT HER BACK. REWARD PAYED.
And below that, a telephone number. Richard looked back at the photograph. It was definitely the girl in his bathroom. “No,” he said. “I haven’t seen her, I’m afraid. I’m sorry.”
Mr. Vandemar, however, was not listening. He had raised his head and was sniffing the air, like a man smelling something odd or unpleasant. Richard reached out to give him back his piece of paper, but the big man simply pushed past him and walked into the apartment, a wolf on the prowl. Richard ran after him. “What do you think you are doing? Will you stop that? Get out. Look, you can’t go in there—” Mr. Vandemar was headed straight for the bathroom. Richard hoped that the girl—Doreen?—had had the presence of mind to lock the bathroom door. But no; it swung open at Mr. Vandemar’s push. He walked in, and Richard, feeling like a small and ineffectual dog yapping at the heels of a postman, followed him in.