Neverwhere(116)

Richard stared up at him. There were dark circles beneath Richard’s eyes. “Do I believe it? I don’t know anymore. I did. I was there. There was a part in there when you turned up, you know.”

“You didn’t mention that before.”

“It was a pretty horrid part. You told me that I’d gone mad and I was just wandering around London hallucinating.”

They walked out of the cafe and walked south, toward Piccadilly. “Well,” said Gary, “you must admit, it sounds more likely than your magical London underneath, where the people who fall through the cracks go. I’ve passed the people who fall through the cracks, Richard: they sleep in shop doorways all down the Strand. They don’t go to a special London. They freeze to death in the winter.”

Richard said nothing.

Gary continued. “I think maybe you got some kind of blow on the head. Or maybe some kind of shock when Jessica chucked you. For a while you went a little crazy. Then you got better.”

Richard shivered. “You know what scares me? I think you could be right.”

“So life isn’t exciting?” continued Gary. “Great. Give me boredom. At least I know where I’m going to eat and sleep tonight. I’ll still have a job on Monday. Yeah?” He turned and looked at Richard.

Richard nodded, hesitantly. “Yeah.”

Gary looked at his watch. “Bloody hell,” he exclaimed. “It’s after two o’clock. Let’s hope there are still a few taxis about.” They walked into Brewer Street, at the Piccadilly end of Soho, wandering past the lights of the peep shows and the strip clubs. Gary was talking about taxis. He was not saying anything original, or even interesting. He was simply fulfilling his obligation as a Londoner to grumble about taxis. ” . . . Had his light on and everything,” he was saying, “I told him where I wanted to go, he said, sorry, I’m on my way home, I said, where do all you taxi drivers live anyway? And why don’t any of you live near me? The trick is to get in first, then tell them you live south of the river, I mean, what was he trying to tell me? The way he was carrying on, Battersea might as well have been in bloody Katmandu . . . “

Richard had tuned him out. When they reached Windmill Street, Richard crossed the road and stared into the window of the Vintage Magazine Shop, examining the cartoonish models of forgotten film stars and the old posters and comics and magazines on display. It had been a glimpse into a world of adventure and imagination. And it was not true. He told himself that.

“So, what do you think?” Gary asked.

Richard jerked back to the present. “Of what?”

Gary realized Richard had not heard a word he had said. He said it again. “If there aren’t any taxis we could get night buses.”

“Yeah,” said Richard. “Great. Fine.”

Gary grimaced. “You worry me.”

“Sorry.”

They walked down Windmill Street, toward Piccadilly. Richard thrust his hands deep into his pockets. He looked puzzled for a moment, and pulled out a rather crumpled black crow’s feather, with red thread tied around the quill.

“What’s that?” asked Gary.

“It’s a—” He stopped. “It’s just a feather. You’re right. It’s only rubbish.” He dropped the feather in the gutter at the curb, and did not look back.

Gary hesitated. Then he said, picking his words with care, “Have you thought about seeing somebody?”

“See somebody? Look, I’m not crazy, Gary.”

“Are you sure about that?” A taxi came toward them, yellow for-hire light burning.

“No,” said Richard, honestly. “Here’s a taxi. You take it. I’ll take the next one.”

“Thanks.” Gary waved down the taxi and climbed into the back before telling the driver that he wished to go to Battersea. He pulled down the window, and, as the taxi pulled out, he said, “Richard—this is reality. Get used to it. It’s all there is. See you on Monday.”

Richard waved at him and watched the taxi drive away. Then he turned around and walked slowly away from the lights of Piccadilly, back up toward Brewer Street. There was no longer a feather by the curb. Richard paused beside an old woman, fast asleep in a shop doorway. She was covered with a ripped old blanket, and her few possessions—two small junk-filled cardboard boxes and a dirty, once-white umbrella—were tied together with string beside her, and the string was tied around her wrist, to keep anyone from stealing them while she slept. She wore a wool hat, of no particular color.

He pulled out his wallet, found a ten-pound note, and bent down to slide the folded note into the woman’s hand. Her eyes opened, and she jerked awake. She blinked at the money with old eyes. “What’s this?” she said, sleepily, displeased at having been woken. “Keep it,” said Richard.