Never Let It Go(5)

“Will?” Oh God, that was Ade’s voice, clear and sharp and obviously calling from home. “Hey, babe, it’s me.”

Will really meant to say something intelligent—welcome home or it’s good to hear your voice or hell, even just hello again. The sound that actually came out of his mouth was a terrible, wrenching sob, like someone had cracked his heart open. It should have been relief—it was relief—but there was something else there, stronger and worse, and he couldn’t keep it inside, not for anything. It had been there, lurking, since the explosion that he couldn’t remember, and now it was coming out.

“Will? Hey, whoa, what’s wrong?”

Will pressed a hand to his mouth, trying to stop. His whole body was drawn tense and shaking with it, his eyes burning with tears.

“Hold on, just give me a second.” Ade sounded like he was moving, between the rustle of clothing and the way the echo on the other end of the line changed. “Okay, I’m back. Isaac’s keeping Mom occupied, just—did something happen?”

Will shook his head, then made himself say, “No,” in the hope that would make Ade stop sounding so scared. He wasn’t even sure the word made any sense. “You’re safe?”

Ade laughed, though it sounded a little too sharp to really be amusement. “Yeah, babe, we’re both safe. Landed an hour or so ago, finally grabbed a minute to call you. Isaac says hi. He’ll call too in a bit. We can’t just both disappear. His parents didn’t manage to make the trip, so I’m not sure why he’s with Mom instead of me, but I wasn’t going to argue if it meant I got to hear your voice….”

Ade kept talking, soothing and easy. After a couple more sentences, Will closed his eyes and just let the sound wash over him, only half paying attention to the words. Every time he heard Ade pause for breath, the terrible thing inside him seemed to ease, until finally, he managed to get the sobbing under control. He couldn’t seem to do anything about the tears, but that was okay. Ade couldn’t see the tears.

“So glad you’re home,” he said when he was sure he could say it without his voice wavering.

“Me too.” Ade’s voice went all soft and warm, like lazy Sunday mornings in bed together. “I missed you so much. We missed you so much. We can’t wait to see you.”

“How long?” The thought of Ade saying hours, or even the next day, made tears surge again. Will tucked the phone under his chin so Ade wouldn’t hear the way his breath caught.

“Mom was talking about taking us all out to dinner, but we persuaded her to do it tomorrow. We’ve got at least another couple of hours here, but we should get out early evening, and we’re coming straight home.” The line went silent for a moment. Then Ade said, sounding hesitant, “I guess you don’t want to go out or anything?”

All Will wanted in the world was to be with the two of them. Nothing else felt like it could really matter. He shook his head anyway. “Not really.” It shouldn’t be hard to say, but he still felt shaken up and exposed. “Just come home.”

“Soon as we can,” Ade promised. “Love you so much.”

“Love you,” Will echoed.





WILL WASN’T sure if Isaac tried to call as well. After he hung up with Ade, he went to take a shower, wash away the weird emotions and the sticky way that crying made him feel. When he finally got dressed again, the bed looked so inviting that he didn’t try too hard to convince himself not to lie down. Just for a few minutes.

He woke up to darkness and the sound of a key in the front door. For once, his usual disorientation on waking receded fast enough for him to know what was coming a moment before a light flicked on in the living room and Isaac called, “Will? You home?”

“What, you think he’s decided to take in a show or something?” Ade bantered back. The door closed firmly, followed by twin thuds of boots being kicked off. “Where’s he going to be except home?”

Will sat up and swung his legs over the side of the bed, suddenly nervous. He should have put on something better than the sweats and loose T-shirt he was wearing. He could have at least combed his hair and turned a light on.

Too late now, though. That was enough for him to feel ridiculous for worrying about it. “In here.” His voice came out a little scratchy with sleep but still loud enough that he knew the others must have heard him.

He didn’t get a response, just footsteps, a light going on in the corridor outside the bedroom door, and then Ade and Isaac were standing there, one either side of the doorframe, finally, finally home. They’d both changed into civvies, presumably before leaving the base. Isaac was dressed in dark fitted jeans and a deep purple long-sleeved T-shirt, the whole outfit making him look even paler than usual. Next to him, Ade was a study in difference. He was more solidly built than Isaac and Will, darker haired and darker skinned, looking like he was home from an office job in navy slacks and a pale blue dress shirt.