Never Kiss an Outlaw(30)

I should've been horrified. But my body responded with a mind of its own, giving me the most explosive orgasm I'd ever had in my life.

The bitter aftermath hit nearly as hard.

I was shaking, exhausted, and ashamed when I walked into my apartment that night. I was strangely satisfied, too, as if he'd given me something I'd been craving and trying to fight forever.

Sick. Scary. Wrong on so many levels.

I couldn't begin to count them all. Hell, I couldn't even handle all the different things I had rushing through my brain, threatening to tear me in two.

I loved what he did to me, and I shouldn't have. I hated him – so I told myself, knowing it was a feeble lie.

Also knew I was more mixed up than I'd ever been before, and the big question weighing on my mind as I tossed and turned that night felt like an anchor around my neck.

What now?

I couldn't begin to guess. There wasn't any fighting the order Skin sent down from Dust, to serve and protect, guarding me until the mysterious threat faded for good.

I'd gotten myself a full time bodyguard I never wanted. I couldn't tell which urge was strong – to kiss him, or slap him across his smug, gorgeous face.

My body knew exactly what I wanted. Desire hummed in every nerve, reminding me how amazing it had been to feel his dangerous strength pressed against me, striking hot, almost inside me.

Just...fuck. As if this wasn't hard enough.

The more time I spent with him, the more my need grew. That's why it stung a thousand times worse than the spanking when he'd threatened to rip it all away.

I needed the big, crude bastard in my life. Needed him even worse than the saner part of me needed him to stay the hell away.

There wasn't a manual here. There was no telling how I'd survive, but I had to try, one day at a time.

If the bad guys nobody would tell me about didn't get to me first, then maybe my own wild desire would. Whatever happened from here, I couldn't ignore the magnetism aiming my body and my mouth straight at him.#p#分页标题#e#

I couldn't just run, much less stay away, now that he'd been assigned to deal with me. When I heard him knocking on my bedroom door, I sat up, and pulled the blanket around me extra tight.

No more escaping it. I had to face my destiny.



The Heel was a madhouse the next day. It almost took the edge off the quiet, awkward ride through town with Firefly. None of us said anything after he asked me about breakfast, and I told him I'd find something to order at the club.

A big group of firemen were in town for some kind of conference. The handsome, rowdy bunch of men buying lap dances left and right nearly gave some of the Pistols guys a run for their looks.

I stared out at the big men laughing while Tawny squirmed in front of them through the small crack in the curtain, making sure everything ran smoothly. So far, so good.

“Hey, don't stare too long. You might go blind – or else you'll make Firefly jealous.” Meg came up behind me so suddenly I jumped.

“What do you mean? He's just my bodyguard,” I lied, hoping the dark light backstage would hide the redness creeping across my cheeks.

“Whatever you say. No worries, we can keep it between us girls. Nobody needs to know you were eye-fucking all the man candy out there.” She winked.

“No, it's not like that,” I insisted. “I was just taking a quick look, doing my job, thinking.”

“Mm-hmm. You do a lot of that, don't you?”

“My father was a lot like them once. Different branch of public service, sure, but he wore a uniform and would probably sneak off to places like this with his friends back when he was on the force. After my mother died, I mean.”

Jesus, what the hell was wrong with me? Why was I thinking about what daddy did in his off hours, much less going to strip clubs?

“That's the way it goes with real men. They might wear different uniforms, but if the heart underneath it's true, then that's what really matters.” Meg nodded sagely, as if she had a burning need to reinforce her own words so I'd believe them. She eyed the small ring on her hand.

Yeah, about that...daddy hadn't been true underneath. He'd gotten himself in deep trouble, handed me to these rough men who wore a different sort of uniform before I got killed, and left this world like a coward.

It still hurt to think of him that way. I hadn't even asked about his ashes, or what happened to our old house after I'd heard about the men on my trail ransacking it. Everything hurt too much.

“I'm talking about the outlaws,” Meg said, studying the pain in my eyes. “They're good men, even Firefly. I wouldn't be walking around wearing Skin's name if it weren't true.”

“These are the guys I was always told to stay away from. I respected the badge, and always did what my father told me.” I shook my head, turning toward the loud hollers coming through the curtain. “I still can't believe it sometimes, the fact that I'm stuck living like this. Can you think of anything worse?”