Never Been Kissed(46)

Dumb as it sounds, I don’t want to move. If this is all Hunt ever wants to offer me, then I’m okay with it. More than okay, actually. Then I remember that Josh or Tommy have put their arms around me just like this, and that we’re friends. This means nothing.

I hug my knees closer to my chest and try to ignore the heat of his arm around me, or what tattoos he has there, ones I haven’t had time to study yet. I rest my chin on my knees and continue watching, until my eyes grow droopy.

“Sera...? Wake up for me, baby. Hi,” Hunter says, gently shaking me awake. He’s looking down at me, while we’re still sitting so close together. God, I hope I haven’t drooled anywhere.

“Hi,” I whisper. “The movie’s done?”

“Almost.” He moves some fallen strands of hair away from my face, puts them behind my ear. My heart clenches again, and I’m finding it hard to breathe.

Kiss me, kiss me, I want to yell, but I don’t. I’m too scared of what’ll happen if he does.

“Can I have a minute? Just give me a minute.” My eyes slide closed again, but I’m aware, and I can hear Sloth yelling. I put my forehead on my forearms, hiding my face in the little enclosed space between arms and knees and thighs. Hunter’s hand slides to the back of my neck, thumbs and fingers moving as he works out the knots there.

I’ve died and gone to a special version of hell – always to be tantalized by Hunter and never to have him. Knowing that I’ll never be good enough for a beautiful man like Hunter MacLaine just about kills me inside.

“Please, stop. Hunter, please. Stop what you’re doing.” It feels too good, loosening my muscles. Now I’m thinking of his hands in other places where I want to be petted.

“Aren’t enjoying it? Fuck, what is it going to take with you?” His hand drops, both of them now resting on his knees.

I turn to him, hands clenched into fists. My jaw’s clenched so tight, I’m not sure I understand me. “I’m not a piece of ass you use your A-game to fuck. I don’t do that – casual sex. Scratch your fucking itch elsewhere. No one’s stopping you.”

“Prove it.” Hunter says. “I want you, Sera.” I’m paralyzed by the look on his face, and the way his words bombard me with a sweet pain. “But I’m not going to fuck you with Matty in the next room. I’m not going to fuck you, period.” Both of his hands come to either side of my face. “I want you, Sera, and I’m going to prove it to you. Just like you need to prove it to me. Tell me you don’t want me and you can walk out of here without taking a chance on us.”

I pull in a breath, make sure I have full eye-contact in the blue glow of the TV. “I don’t want you.”

“Say it again,” he says, licking his lips, eyes riveted to my mouth. That fraking tingling starts again. “Say it again, Sera.”

“I... I don’t want you like that. I want you as a friend,” I say, and what little strain there is in my words, I’m sure he can’t hear it.

Hunter’s voice is soft and strangely reassuring. “Baby, I’m attracted to you, and the way you look at me tells me you’re into me, too. Friendship isn’t going to work. Now, say it again.” His thumbs swipe my cheekbones. I’ve gone and swallowed my tongue.

I shake my head, my breath huffing in and out. I move to jerk back from his grip, hands going around his wrists.

“Sera, look down at your hands.” I look to where he’s looking. Instead of tightening my grip around his wrists trying to pull them off of me – my thumbs are caressing his inner wrists. “Say it again for me. Tell me you don’t want me.”

If there was enough light, I’m sure his blue eyes would have darkened. Pupil dilation – a classic sign of lust. The body wants to see more of what it wants. I’ve never been lusted after before. I’m not sure I can trust it. Then again, a physiological response can’t be faked.

“I... I don’t want you.” Good girl, Delos! That deserves a brownie.

“Say it again.” More thumb swiping along my cheekbones, back and forth, back and forth. Frak. I’ve leaned closer so his breath is fanning my lips. I’m dizzy with want.

“I...don’t..want. You.” Jesus, that was hard.

“One more time, say it again, and I won’t put my mouth on you. I won’t taste that mouth of yours and all the nerdy things that come out of it. I won’t tangle my tongue with yours, stroke it, lick it and suck it like I want to. Say it again, Sera. Do it for me, baby.”

Hunter wants an answer. I keep looking at his mouth, up to his eyes, only to go back to his eyes. Fuck, I want to taste him. I want Hunter to have my first kiss. But God, I’m going to be awful at his, so I have to stay strong.