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Never Been Kissed(31)

By:Kars, C.M


“You don’t want me.” The words drop like bullet casings on the table between us, each audible, each echoing, each lonely.

Getting pissed, I say, “What are you, new?” I’ve gone and spoken my odd language he doesn’t understand again. “Ever watch Boy Meets World? Cory Matthews said it.”

I get a brilliant smile, so bright and beautiful my heart stumbles in a game of cardiac hopscotch.

“So you want me.” Fraking hell, he’s really confident now.

I roll my eyes so hard, my brain waves hello. “It’s rude to point out that you’re good looking and anyone with ovaries would notice. I don’t know what you’ve been told, but there’ more to a person than blue eyes, and stubble, and...” Shut up, shut up!

The food arrives, the waitress either ignoring the tension between us or recognizing it and knowing it’s too early in the morning to deal with this shit.

I destroy my eggs and move to my French toast hoping to get out of here quick.

“I still want to take you out.”

I should be flattered, and I am. A part of me is still wondering ‘why me?’ when he can get any girl he wants. “And I’m going to say no.”

I swear, it’s like a steel door has been slammed between us. He moves deeper into his side of the booth, creating more space between us, mouth firming up into a grim line.

“Is it because I’m sick? I can eat anything, anywhere. I can still take you out.”

I frown so hard, it could become permanent. “I don’t care about that. Frak, every hero ever created in the known universe has something wrong with them.” I wave off his concern. “I’m just not what you need right now.”

“What do I need, Sera? Tell me what I need.” His voice is deeper, like the kind of way a man might talk to a woman...in bed. Holy Goblet of Fire!

“You know what you need.” I let the words hang there, watching his blue eyes rumble with a storm in the hue. “You need to take care of yourself. You need help with Matty. I’m offering that help, and you’re gonna take it. You need to regulate your sugars, Hunt.”

He drops his gaze from mine, and it feels like his whole body shuts down at my words, or been replaced by stone. He stabs his steak and eggs, cutting it viciously with fork and knife. “What if you’re what I need?” he says through clenched teeth. Yeah, so the Beast. Does that make me Belle?

“Prove it to me, then. Prove it to me that I’m undeniably who you want.” Fraking hell, did I really just say that? The conviction in my words is plain to hear. I don’t believe he will. I’m never what anybody wants.

Hunter gives me that dimpled smile again, making my skin erupt in goosebumps. “You’ve got a deal.”

I nod absently while returning my attention back to my food. I can’t let myself hope, let myself believe. The words he just spoke – they’re words in my dreams, not here, in real life. God, I’m scared. No one’s ever proclaimed to want me before – I’m lost and confused. I need to talk to Katie. I need some serious help.



***



After we ate, Hunter drove me to work, kissing me on the cheek as goodbye. I tried to play it cool; I did not palm my cheek where he kissed me nor did I stare open mouthed as he unbuckled my seat belt for me, and leaned across my body to open the passenger door. I did not gasp when he called me baby again and told me he would call me that afternoon to arrange for dinner. I did not stumble out of the car and watch him drive away. I swear, I did none of these things.

If I’m not careful, I’m going to be another conquest for Hunter. Frak.

I text Katie when I sit down at my desk:

Please call me at the office when you get this. I really need to talk. Maybe we can meet for lunch? I need your help.

I’m foggy all morning. I can’t concentrate, and end up misfiling documents like a pro. I check my phone every five minutes, going through a roller coaster ride of emotion, hoping for a text, only to plummet into mini episodes of depression when my phone does not dance across the surface of my desk.

My phone vibrates. I hawkeye it to see if it’ll vibrate again. Not Hunter, then.

A text from Katie:

For sure we can do lunch! I’ll come get you for twelve-thirty. We can have sushi! Sushi makes the world a better place. ESPECIALLY if it’s followed with bubble tea. My treat, buddy. See you soon. Xx

I somehow manage to hold on until lunch. I hold on when I get in Katie’s car, smiling a fake one so bright, I’m good for a Colgate Total commercial. We enter our order on the order slip, piling on sushi pizza and a whole bunch of makis at our favourite sushi restaurant.