Nerd Girl(12)

“Did you miss it when you left?”

“Yeah, I did. But, I had other priorities that needed to be taken care of,” he said thoughtfully. “After a while, my mom got better and starting adjusting to a new life without my dad. My sister graduated. I had always wanted to go to grad school and get an MBA, so I applied to the Stanford business program. I got in, fortunately, and then found myself back in the Silicon Valley.”

“But you moved back to Seattle again after that?” I was really curious about Ryan’s life story. I kept peppering him with questions and he didn’t seem to mind. I found everything about him so interesting. He was both thoughtful and introspective about his answers.

“There were a lot of jobs in the Bay Area, but I really felt that I needed to be here for my mom. She missed my dad so much and I could tell it was hard to have me away again. MS offered me a Product Management job out of grad school, so I took it. I’ve been at MS ever since.”

“What group did you say you were in again?” I asked him.

“I’m in the US Sub in marketing. What about you?”

“I’m in CMG.”

He nodded recognizing the name of my new department, the Corporate Marketing Group, but didn’t inquire any further. We continued to talk comfortably through our dinner. I only told him half the truth about why I’d decided to change jobs. I couldn’t exactly tell him I took it to forget about my ex-boyfriend. He wanted to hear more about Anna and me and what growing up was like as twins. He seemed genuinely interested in hearing everything I volunteered to tell him about our unique relationship. He asked a lot of questions about my childhood and college years. We even discussed politics, which tended to be a subject I’d normally avoid when I didn’t know someone very well.

Through our conversation, I learned that he was well-read, well-informed on current world events, and had some strong but very respectful opinions about the state of our economy and the election. Fortunately, we voted along the same party lines. I bet he was on the debate team in high school. I loved listening to him talk and found his intelligence incredibly sexy. I found the stubble on his chin sexy, too, and my gaze lingered on it every time he brought his hand up to rub his chin. He did this regularly whenever I was speaking and it was his turn to listen.

His own stories told me a lot about the type of man he was. He put his family first, he was unselfish and responsible, he was extremely intelligent and ambitious, but he also seemed to keep his personal life separate from his professional life. I loved that even though we both worked at MS, we opted not to talk much about it. I was honored by the amount of personal information that he chose to reveal to me and was surprised at my own willingness to open up about my family and myself.

I found it so easy to talk to him, to be with him. Any shyness or awkwardness had worn off soon after we sat down for dinner. Questions and comments kept slipping out of my mouth before I realized what I’d said—there just didn’t seem to be a filter here with him. Maybe he felt or sensed the same thing. For someone I’d only just met, it was hard to believe how comfortable our conversation was and how fluidly we moved from one topic to another.

Then there was the obvious attraction between the two of us. I had felt it since the moment we shook hands earlier in the evening and I felt it the whole time we were talking. It was like there was this electrical current vacillating and humming between us. Through the night, there were some short lulls between our conversations, but they weren’t uncomfortable and there wasn’t an awkward need to fill the quiet space.

During those short lulls, we gave each other shy smiles, like we had each had some sort of secret that we didn’t want to share just yet. I had never experienced such comfort and ease with a man on a first date before. Not that this was a first date or anything. In fact, I’m not really sure what this was tonight. This evening was slowly turning into an unexpected and special gift. My confidence and ego had been shattered over these last few months and it felt so good to have a man look at me appreciatively and talk to me about something other than work. I was flattered by his genuine interest in my intellect, my stories, and just me.

I sensed one area of reservation on both our parts, though. I really didn’t want to talk about relationships with him; the last thing I wanted to bring up was Andrew. I purposely stayed away from any discussion topic that strayed in that territory and he seemed to do the same. I just didn’t feel ready to go there yet. Though I had my reasons for not discussing these sensitive subjects, I found myself very curious and wanting to understand more about his reasons for keeping silent on the same matter. Who was the friend that had cancelled on him tonight, anyway? The way he reacted, I guessed it was a female friend. Maybe I would never know.