“Just remember that she's a person and people make mistakes, okay?”
“Mistakes that got our family killed, Tease.”
“I know. I'm just telling you to remember that she shouldn't have to suffer. Nobody should.” Darren takes a massive breath.
“Are you talking about Margot or something else, Emilie?” I look up at the door, imagining Beck on the other side of it. In my head, he's leaning against it, trying to figure out a way to keep me, desperate for the chance to try. I know it's just a fantasy, but it's an entertaining one.
“I know it's ungodly early, and it's a long drive, but can you make it?”
“I'd ride wherever I had to to get you back, Emilie. You know that.” His words make me feel sick to my stomach. I know this isn't the end of the world and that, realistically speaking, I could feasibly meet up with Beck again someday. But it doesn't feel like it.
“This evening then?” I ask him, trying to calculate how long it'll take the club to get here. “Six o'clock?”
“I'll be there, Emilie. I can't wait to see you.”
“You, too,” I whisper and then there's a click as Darren hangs up. I sit there for a second with a burn in my eyes, tears straining to slide down my face. Life is hard sometimes. Sometimes the price you have to pay is too high, especially if there's a risk involved. This is just one risk I can't take. I stand up and open the door, finding Beck leaning against the wall beside it, much like in my fantasy vision. “The trade,” I tell him as he grins and starts to stand up. As soon as I say that, his demeanor changes and the smile slides straight off his face. “Today at six.”
“The hell you talkin' about?” he asks me, looking baffled and pretty fucking adorable. Beck runs his fingers through his hair as I do my best to avoid looking at his chest. “We were going to go for a ride today, grab another hamburger. You can't do this to me, sugar.” He tries to smile again, but I can't smile back. If I do, I'll lose it. I try to keep telling myself that he killed Oren, but it doesn't matter as much as it should. Family, family, he was family. I swallow hard.
“I can't do this, Beck. I'm sorry. I'd like to stay, but I can't.” I tell him this, watching his facial expression for any sign that I should change my mind. Anything. Instead he just shakes his head and rubs at the stubble on his chin.
“You have to make your own decisions, Emilie,” Beck says, but he doesn't elaborate on that thought. Instead he asks me a simple question that both breaks my heart and fractures my soul. “What time are we meetin'?”
Beck
Chapter 26
I'm standing in a shopping plaza with my heart in my Goddamn throat, my motorcycle parked in a line of others, my club spread out behind me. Opposite us, Seventy-seven Brothers stands somberly. True to our word, Margot walked out of that hotel a free woman and right into the arms of the enemy. So things are peaceful for now. What the hell would happen if I threw up my arms and said fuck it? Grabbed Tease around the waist and dealt with consequences later. It's too damn soon to really understand these fucking feelings I'm having, but I can't stop myself from having them. Let her go, Beck. It's the best thing for Melissa, the best thing for the club, and the best thing for you. You don't know her. She doesn't know you. This is downright dumb as a dog's butt.
Tease stands in front of me, facing me, her back to her brother, but she doesn't move.
“Go ahead,” I tell her, watching with a tight chest and fists squeezed so tight that blood drips from my palms onto the brick pavers below. “Go on.” My voice is gruff and full of pain. I don't know why – ain't like the bitch is being sent off to burn or nothing. Theoretically we could still keep in touch. Theoretically. But we both know it isn't ever going to happen. A long distance relationship? Shoot. I've never even had a close distance relationship. Besides, we might've figured out that our rat fired that first shot, set our clubs at each other's throats, but that doesn't mean Seventy-seven Brothers didn't kill us and ours. Doesn't mean I didn't stab their Sergeant at arms to death. They're good people; we're good people. However, our jackets speak a different language. It'll be a long, long time until we're able to forgive and forget.
Tease starts walking backward, her green eyes on mine, her hand on her chest. In the background, I see Melissa limping forward, face sweaty and eyes far away. But she looks alright, 'specially for somebody that got shot in the damn back. I can look at her later, though. Right now, all I need to see is Tease. I need to memorize the luscious curve of her lips, her perfect nose, her delicately sculpted chin. She sweeps some red hair from her face, her green eyes widening as she continues to move backwards, heels sounding loud on the bricks.