"Couldn't. Past tense."
"What does that mean, exactly?" Against all the odds, the very fact that Kyle was here, that he had gone to a great deal of trouble to find her, filled her with wild hope. Hope that she couldn't afford because she had barely survived leaving Kyle and, now that she was pregnant, she could not accept the empty, convenient marriage he preferred. And she would not, absolutely not, terminate her pregnancy.
"I followed you to the cemetery the day of the wedding. I thought-"
His gaze connected with hers for a long, tense moment. "I was saying goodbye."
Kyle pushed to his feet and did a restless circuit of the room before crouching down and taking her hands in his. "I made a mistake, about you and the baby. And about myself. I thought I couldn't heal, but I did-it just took time." In grim, rough words, he told her about his hunt for her and the research into her past that had finally made him face his own demons. "When Nicola and Evan died I blamed myself."
Despite her determination to keep as much emotional distance from Kyle as she could while he spoke, her heart broke for what he'd been through. "You couldn't protect them from a terrorist attack."
"They shouldn't have been with me in barracks. I should have made them stay in New Zealand where it was safe." He was silent for a moment. "I was waiting for them as they turned into the barracks. One minute they were there, the next there was...nothing."
Appalled, she stared at the tight clasp of his hands. "I didn't realize you had seen it." And suddenly the small scars across his stomach and arms, the nick on his cheekbone made sense. If he'd been caught by a bomb blast, he would have had multiple injuries.
She touched her abdomen. "This baby could die." In terse words she told him the grim details of her childhood.
"I know," he said simply. "But the fact that our child may have the disorder, as bad as that would be, was never the issue."
And finally she understood. Kyle had blamed himself for the deaths of his wife and child, but it hadn't ended there. Guilt had seared so deep he thought he didn't deserve love or fatherhood.
She touched his clasped hands. "I thought you were incapable of loving either me or the baby." When the reality was that Kyle was exactly what she had first thought him to be when she had fallen for him as a teenager, a strong protector who loved deeply. The way he had responded to the loss of his family only underlined that fact.
Kyle gripped her hand. "I can love you and this baby, if you'll let me."
Dimly, she heard her name being called.
When she stood up, she pulled Kyle with her. "This is my husband," she said a little shakily. "I'd like him to come into the appointment with me."
Kyle sat with her while she had the procedure. When the clinician had finished, he ascertained the time it would take to receive the test results then made some calls. Normally it took two weeks, but a hefty donation to the lab facility, and the time was reduced to forty-eight hours.
When they left the clinic, on the advice of the clinician, Kyle insisted that Eva shouldn't drive and that she needed to spend the next couple of days taking it easy.
Kyle accompanied her down in the elevator. When they reached the shadowy environs of the parking garage beneath the clinic, Eva gestured in the direction of her car. "I could move back into my place for a couple of days."
Kyle's Maserati flashed as he unlocked it. "I want you to stay at the house."
Kyle was still looking at her in an intent way that made her heart beat faster, as if he couldn't bear to let her out of his sight.
She drew a deep breath, feeling breathless and on edge but oddly, crazily confident about Kyle for the first time ever. "Why?"
He cupped her face between his hands, and she let him pull her close, loving the soft gleam in his gaze. "Because I love you. I'm in love with you. I want you back, if you'll have me."
She felt weird and a little dizzy, but the feeling was oh, so good. "Yes."
A split second later she was in his arms. The emotions that rolled through her were too powerful and intense to even think of moving; all she could do was cling to Kyle, absorb the warmth and comfort of his presence, and the stunning fact that he loved her.
She drew an impeded breath. "I love you."
A split second later, he dipped his head, and finally he kissed her.
* * *
Two days later, Kyle, who had taken time off work to be with her, took the phone call from the clinic. He handed the phone to Eva.
Fingers shaking, she listened to the result then terminated the call.
Kyle pulled her close. "What did they say? Not that it matters. For however long we have this baby, we'll love it, and if you want more we'll adopt."
Eva swallowed, hardly able to believe what she'd heard after years of fearing the worst. "They think it's all right. There's no sign of any abnormality." Then she burst into tears.
Kyle simply held her, and when she'd finished crying, he pulled her outside down to the sunlight-filled cove at the bottom of the garden.
He loosened off his hold and handed her a clean handkerchief. "I just wish you'd told me about the disorder years ago."
"I didn't know I was affected until after Mario broke us up." She shrugged. "It was after that that he took me to a specialist and I had the tests done. I think he was afraid I'd run after you." She sent him a slanting glance, "And he was right. But when I understood I was a carrier of the disease, that changed everything."
Kyle's brows jerked together. "I would never have walked away from you because of a medical issue. Mario told me to back off. He didn't say why, exactly, but he gave me the impression you came out of an abusive home, that you needed protection, not sex."
She coiled her arms around his neck, loving the feel of him so close, adjusting by slow increments to the knowledge that her future and the baby's was going to be a whole lot different than she had imagined. "Secrets are hard to let go of-they become part of you." She hesitated, but it was time to let go of her own hurt. "Did I tell you that I love you, that I've loved you for years?"
"Not today." Dipping his head, he kissed her for long, dizzying minutes.
Eva drew a deep breath as Kyle finally lifted his head. In the time they'd been talking, the sun had slid down the horizon and the shadows were lengthening. "We should go back to the house."
"First, you need to wear these." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a familiar black velvet ring box. Holding her wedding and engagement rings in one hand, he went down on one knee on the sand and slid them onto the third finger of her left hand.
In the deep, steady voice she loved so much, because it was an expression of Kyle's character, that he, himself, was steady and true, he asked her if she would be his wife for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health.
Her throat closed up. "I will. I love you."
When he rose to his feet, she lifted up for his kiss. As they walked back to the house together, Eva knew they would have difficulties to face but, finally, she was secure in the knowledge that whatever came, they would face it together.
Epilogue
Six and a half months later, in the midst of renovations to the house they had firmly updated while keeping all of the beautiful period features, Eva put the final touches to the nursery.
Maybe it was old-fashioned to want an actual nursery opening off the master bedroom, but since she would only be pregnant this once, she had decided she would have it exactly how she wanted. The renovation and redecorating had entailed planning, hours of online browsing and multiple shopping trips, but it had been a labor of love.
Kyle, who had arrived home unexpectedly, considering that it was only two in the afternoon and he shouldn't have been home for a whole three hours, leaned against the doorjamb and surveyed the room. "It looks good." He gave her a slightly wary look as he loosened off his tie. "Is it finished?"
Eva dragged her gaze from the electric blue of Kyle's. Months into a marriage that had been more sublime and interesting than she could have imagined, because she had never had to share her space with a man, she was even more in love with her husband.
Her husband.
The words still gave her a thrill and filled her with a glow of happiness. She and Kyle had spent time on Medinos, a honeymoon gift from Kyle so she could get in touch with her Atraeus roots and get to know her Messena relatives. She had met more family than she could poke a stick at, but the experience had been filled with laughter and healing. Most of all, she had enjoyed doing up the house with Kyle-the house that he had bought for her-working together to create a home that was a harmonious blend of them both. They still disagreed; on occasion they argued, but Eva figured that was a healthy sign.