A voice with a distinctly Irish accent came from behind me. “Well, lass, every relationship has its downsides.” I turned around and saw the leprechaun standing eye level in the nearest straw mound. “Clover!” I said with relief. I pulled the chain as far over as I could go in his direction. “Clover, you’ve got to help me!” He strolled down the straw, lifting the brim of his hat to better see me. “Technically I’m not allowed to help. I’m just supposed to check up on you.” He pulled a pencil and a piece of paper from his breast pocket. “Chrissy even gave me a checklist.” He stopped at the bottom of the straw mound and looked me up and down. “Your hair is fashionably done. Check. Wearing a stunning gown. I guess so, if that’s the sort of thing you like.” He marked it off on the paper, then returned his gaze to my face. “Makeup. Nope. I’d better fix that.” He snapped his fingers, but whether anything changed on my face, I couldn’t tell.
“Clover, listen to me for a minute.” Clover cocked his head. “I suppose your eye shadow is too bright and Her Excellence of Fairyness wouldn’t approve.” He let out a grunt.
“I’m a full-fledged leprechaun and she’s using me as a bloomin’
makeup artist.” He snapped his fingers again then considered me.
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“Now the lipstick is too red. We can’t have you look like a ruddy barn tart, can we?”
Hudson had been watching us in surprised silence, but now he spoke. “You’re the leprechaun that sent me here, aren’t you?” Clover snapped his fingers again. “Better,” he said, and made another mark on his paper. “Makeup done. Check.” He folded the paper, slipped it into his pocket, then turned his attention to Hudson. “At present, I’m a leprechaun for hire, but I’m not taking new clients until I’m done with this assignment. If you’re interested after that, and you have the gold to pay, I can leave you my card. I’ve started me own business: the You’re in Luck Leprechaun Agency.” Hudson put his hands on his hips and narrowed his eyes. “I was outside Tansy’s house and you sent me to Sherwood Forest with a gang of thieves.”
Now Clover studied him in earnest. “That’s because you’re one of the Merry Men.”
“No, I’m from the twenty-first century and I was just over at Tansy’s house doing homework with her brother.” Clover cocked his head, unconcerned. “Well, you seemed merry enough at the time.”
“Trust me,” Hudson said slowly. “I’m not merry right now.” Clover reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out the short stubby wand Chrissy had given him. The number on the top read “1.” He rattled the wand as though this would change the reading. “What a blaggarding mess. This means I left one of the Merry Men in the twenty-first century. Well, that’s not going to look good on the assignment evaluation at all.” He examined the wand, dissatisfied, and shoved it back into his jacket. “What were you doing hanging about with the Merry Men? Were you trying to trick me?” 159/356
“No, I was trying to keep an eye on the suspects until the police arrived.” Hudson waved his hand to encompass me in his gesture.
“Are you going to fix this mess and send us back?”
“I haven’t the magic to send you back,” Clover said. “All this means is that now I’ve got a ruddy lot of paperwork to do, and then I’ve got to go find a Merry Man. Who knows how long that will take?” He buttoned his jacket with intent motions like he was about to leave. I moved toward him, forgetting about the chain until it jerked me back. “Clover, this whole wish is a mistake. You can’t leave us here.
That isn’t fair.”
Clover shook his head. “Mortals. You have no understanding of magic. You might mistakenly drive your car off a cliff, but mistake or not, you can’t undo the damage. When you made your wishes, you took hold of the steering wheel. Where your wishes take you … well, that’s your business. This fellow has to stay here with the rest of you until the fairy tale ends.” Clover took out a pocket watch and squinted at the time. “And speaking of business, I’ve got to go fill out a ‘Mortal in the Wrong Time Period’ report sheet.” I knew what to say to keep Clover from leaving. “I’ll give you gold.”
He looked at me from underneath the brim of his hat. “Gold, you say?”
I nodded. “In a little while this room will be full of gold. King John won’t notice if some is missing. If you help us, you can have an entire spool.”