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Murder on the Orient Espresso(65)



‘Lie, Pinocchio, lie,’ I chanted, parroting the old joke.

Entering the passenger car, I was surprised to see that people seemed unconcerned. In fact, they seemed to be having a fine time.

‘Everything all right out there?’ Prudence asked, pearls askew and her voice a little more airy than I’d previously heard it.

‘Just ducky.’ Pavlik put his hand on the back of the first seat and surveyed the scene. Then nearly under his breath, ‘Jesus, Maggy. I think they’re all drunk.’

The passenger car was, indeed, as high as it was barely dry. Zoe Scarlett was making her way to an empty seat, but instead of simply sitting down in it, she scarfed a bottle of what appeared to be Kahlua before moving on.

Pavlik shook his head. ‘Well, that explains it. I’m going to check with Boyce.’

I followed the sheriff, stopping at the row Zoe had. There had to be fifteen bottles there, some on the seat, some in a box on the floor. Pete the bartender was snoring next to them, head tilted against the window.

‘How’d you get the entire contents of the bar in here?’ I asked Markus, who was slouching across the aisle.

‘The bartender helped Audra and that kid Danny bring it to us.’ He nodded about halfway back in the car, to where Audra Edmonds sat beside Rosemary Darlington.

Now there were curious seatmates. The widow and the woman she suspected her husband had been cheating with?

‘And good thing, too.’ Zoe was a few rows farther down with the Kahlua bottle. ‘Since I’m not sure we’d want to go up there now.’ She took a swig. ‘Should have gotten glasses, though. This is unsanitary, even given the alcohol content as antisleptic.’

She giggled, then stopped. Then resumed and couldn’t stop.

Given the situation, it might not be the worst thing in the world if they all got drunk and fell asleep – or passed out – until help arrived, even if by boat.

Assuming it ever did.

Trying to remain positive, I continued on past Harvey/Hardman, who had his plaid jacket reversed and tucked under his chin. He probably meant it as a blanket but the effect was a really gaudy bib. Then again, you’d never see the food stains on it.

Pavlik was at the back of the car, talking to Boyce.

‘You wouldn’t have seen the three of them,’ Boyce was saying. ‘They bypassed the dining car where you were, coming back in this exit.’ He pointed to the vestibule.

No wonder we’d heard opening and closing with no one actually entering the dining car itself. The threesome had risked going out into the Everglades to smuggle the booze without our noticing.

We should have asked them to be the scouting party.

I put my hand on the bathroom door handle, intending to check out the bump on my head, when it slid open and Missy appeared.

‘Oh, I’m sorry, Maggy,’ she said, stepping out. ‘Go ahead, but be warned. It’s pretty disgusting with all of us using just this one.’

I looked at Pavlik, thinking of all the toilets and sinks in the sleeping roomettes. ‘Do you think we—’

He shook his head. ‘Sorry, but we’ve already made things difficult enough for the crime-scene people. The least I can do is keep that car reasonably untainted.’

I sensed his frustration and put my hand out. ‘Hey, you’ve done a great job of keeping everybody calm during a horrible situation.’

Harvey let out a snort and began to snore.

‘Not, apparently, as effectively as the booze did,’ Pavlik said. ‘You want to take a break, Boyce? I can take over.’

‘I don’t mind if I do,’ the other man said. ‘This is one of those times I wish I still smoked, but maybe I’ll just go answer the call of nature.’

I stepped aside to let him go into the bathroom, but he shook his head. ‘Given the sheriff saying the rain has stopped, I think I’ll venture out.’

Boyce continued on to the exit.

‘Guys are so lucky,’ I said. ‘You can go anywhere.’

‘One of our many charms,’ Pavlik said. ‘Why don’t you get some sleep? Once the sun comes up, a couple of us will probably have to hike out of here and get help. I’d like you to be fresh.’

I sniffed my armpit. ‘I’m not sure that’s possible, but I’ll do my best.’

Pavlik laughed.

But I put my hand on his forearm. ‘Are you sure we should venture off our little … island instead of just waiting for help?’

‘I’m not sure we have a choice, but we’ll talk about it before I decide. For now, though, sleep. OK?’

As if I’d sleep. So I did the next best thing – found two open seats right behind Audra Edmonds and Rosemary Darlington.