"So why is it so bad to be in love with him if he isn't the slime ball that everyone makes him out to be?" she asked curiously, rubbing her thumb over the back of Naomi's hand.
Naomi shook her head. "Oh, well … . It's just that he's my boss and he has been with a lot of women, I think … at least, that's what the ladies in the office say. They've all been there longer than me, but I've never seen it. Anyway, I have no business falling in love with my boss, especially him, and especially since he doesn't love me back."
Andrea's eyes grew wide with understanding then, and she nodded quietly. "I see … my poor girl." She said sorrowfully as she leaned forward and wrapped her arms around Naomi. "I thought when you said you two were friends that he was falling for you, too. I didn't know he wasn't into you, and it was just you on the field. That's really terrible," she said softly as she pulled Naomi into a big hug and held her tightly.
Naomi let a few more tears fall and she closed her eyes. "It's so horrible. I tried to fight it. I did. As soon as I realized that I was falling for him, I kept a little more of a distance, I tried to be more professional, and I kept telling myself that I had no business feeling like that, and that I had to focus on just keeping a working relationship with him, or at most a developing friendship. But he just got under my skin and now I'm trapped and I'm in love with him, and there's no way out of it for me."
Andrea leaned back and lifted Naomi's chin, looking into her sad blue eyes. "What do you mean there's no way out of it for you? There's always something that can be done."
"No … he's my boss and it's my dream job. What am I going to do, quit? I'm going to leave my dream job that I worked so hard all of these years to get?" Naomi looked imploringly at her friend. "I want to work there, but I can't now. How am I supposed to work with a man who I am in love with, who doesn't love me back?"
"Change bosses? Work for someone else in the same kind of capacity at the same company but for another person?" Andrea suggested helpfully.
"Anyone else would be a step down. He's the second in command there, after his father. I guess I don't mind stepping down, but he's still going to be there. I'm still going to run into him." She sniffled and touched the tissue to her eyes and nose before looking back up at Andrea.
"Besides … it gets worse."
Andrea's eyebrows shot back up. "Worse? How could it be worse?"
Naomi closed her eyes and wondered how she was going to tell Andrea what had happened. It was bad enough that she had thought of it over and over and over again in her mind, and that every time she thought of it, her body reacted hotly and desire swept through her, but admitting it and trying to explain it to her best friend was difficult.
"I was having a hard day the last day that I was at work. I was trying to ignore him, trying to just keep it business between us, and he got too close to me and I couldn't take it, so I ran. He chased me and I thought I could get to the elevators in time, but he made it inside the elevator with me before the door closed.
Then we were in there alone and he kept trying to talk to me, but I wouldn't look at him, and then all of a sudden, he was holding me, wiping tears off of my face, and then before I knew what was happening, he was kissing me." She looked away from Andrea.
Andrea's mouth fell open again. "Oh my god, he kissed you?" her fingers closed firmly around Naomi's hand. "Did you kiss him back?"
Naomi raised her eyes and looked at her friend. "At first I didn't, but then … it was so … incredible. It was too much for me to say no to, and I did kiss him back." She sighed as the memories gripped her and her body heated at the thought of it. "That man can kiss … " she breathed deeply.
"Well I bet he can, he's had a lot of practice." Andrea said with a side glance away from Naomi.
"No … it wasn't like that … not, um … not technique, although he is very good at that, too, but just … the feeling of it was like nothing I've ever felt before. The feeling of it was amazing. It was so powerful … so strong and just overwhelming, really. I thought I was going to melt right there in his arms. I couldn't take it." She said sadly, looking at Andrea.
"So what did you do?" Andrea asked, looking excited about the whole part with the kiss.
Naomi shrugged. "Well, when the elevator doors opened I ran. I ran outside and grabbed a taxi and came home, and I've been here ever since. I shut my cell off, except to call you, so I haven't heard from anyone. I'm too worried that he'll call me. I don't want to talk to him."
Andrea frowned again and leveled her gaze at Naomi. "Honey, this isn't high school. You can't do that. He's your boss; you have a job to do and it isn't getting done while you are here hiding out at home because you wish you hadn't fallen for him. You have got to figure something out one way or another and then do it. You either suck it up and go back to work and just deal with it, or you quit the job and get a job somewhere else, but laying here on your couch with your cat, crying about being in love with your boss is not an option. That's not a choice. You're going to have to do something else."
Naomi sighed and turned her head to look out of the window. "I know … I know I have to do something. It's just so hard to know what to do. I wish my mom was here. I wish I could tell her everything and ask her what to do."
"Well," Andrea said with a big breath and a soft pat on Naomi's hand, "She can't be here, but I am here, and I will do my best to help you through this. You get that phone turned back on, and you get back to work or you quit your job."
Naomi nodded. "I will."
Andrea tipped her head and rubbed her finger over her chin thoughtfully. "What did he kiss you for? In the elevator … what made him kiss you?" she asked curiously.
"I don't know. I honestly have no idea. Maybe he felt sorry for me because I was crying. He said he didn't want me to cry. Maybe he does know that I'm in love with him and he was just waiting for the right opportunity to plant one on me. I have no idea why he kissed me. I'm as surprised as you are.
"He hasn't made any kind of moves toward me at all really; I mean, there have been moments between us when things were steamy or close, or when I thought that he might kiss me, but then I started thinking that those moments were all in my head and he didn't really want me, because he's so strong and determined, Andrea, if he wanted me, he would tell me. Nothing would hold him back. He's not one to hold back when he wants something. It's just my bad luck that I fell in love with someone who doesn't want me at all." Naomi held her hand on her forehead and closed her eyes, sighing deeply.
Andrea watched her and shook her head sorrowfully. "Well, the most important thing right now isn't worrying about the love aspect of it. The most important thing you could do right now is get yourself straightened back out. You need to either go back to work or quit your job. Don't worry about the being in love part, in fact, try your hardest not to focus on that. You focus on work and figuring out just exactly what you want to do about it, so that you can get on with your life. You do not need to stop right in the middle of your career path and get all tangled up around a man, especially one who doesn't want you.
She rolled her eyes then. "Although why he doesn't want you is beyond me. You're smart, witty, funny, thoughtful, caring, and you are a damn fine looking woman. He'd be so lucky to have you with him, however you wanted to be with him."
Naomi laid her head on the back of the sofa and looked out of the window as she ran her fingers through Harold's fluffy orange hair. "It doesn't matter how I am or what I look like, because what I am and what I look like isn't what he wants. So you're right, the only thing I should be focused on is work, and I knew that. I was trying to focus on work when he got too close." She sighed and frowned a little.
"I guess I'm just going to have to figure out a way to let go of him so I can keep working there, because I don't want to let go of my job. I want to keep working at Cross Corp. I love the company and I love what I do there. The only real problem is me; I have to figure out how to resolve my feelings for him and just let them go so I can keep working there and make it my career." She let a deep breath out slowly and wondered how on earth she was ever going to do that.
Andrea watched her and reached a hand up to rub her arm. "You'll figure it out. You always do. You have more drive and determination in you than I have ever seen in anyone. And I don't think you've ever really failed at anything because you work so hard for everything. Just keep working hard, push him out of your heart and mind and stop letting him get under your skin, and then you'll do really well at the job and you won't have anything else to worry about. Now, I know that's probably easier said than done, but just try it. Work at it. Give yourself a little space and faith, and know that you can and will come out on the other side of this. If anyone can do it, you can."