Jonathon tried to read through the pages in the file on his desk, but he read the first page more than four times before he realized that he had no idea what was one it. His mind was completely distracted with Naomi, sitting outside of his office door in her office, ignoring him and working on the things she was working on.
He was confused and disappointed when he had discovered that she had left the party early without even so much as a word to him, and then to come in to the office and find her so cool and indifferent toward him. He could not understand what had changed between them, and why she was acting the way that she was, but it bothered him and no amount of trying to ignore it and concentrate on work would make it go away.
They had a meeting that day just before lunch, and when he walked out of his office to get her so that they could go to the meeting together, he found that she was already gone. When he got to the meeting, he saw that she was seated between two other ladies.
He looked hard at her for a moment, willing her to look up at him so that she could move and sit beside him, but she was looking intently at the papers in the file in her hands, and she would not look away from it. He sighed and sat down by himself on the other side of the table.
Jonathon spent the entire meeting glancing at her subtly and wondering what was bothering her, if anything was, and wondering why she was suddenly so distant and cold. His heart ached that she had put up a wall between them out of the blue, and he wanted nothing more than to break it down.
When the meeting ended, he moved quickly to get to the door and as she passed through it, he reached for her arm and pulled her aside. She looked up at him, startled, and drew in a breath. He was too close to her. He was much too close to her for her to be able to concentrate or even breathe; and his eyes bored right into her as if he was looking as deeply as he could, hoping to see right into her mind.
She took a step back and a look of worry flashed in his eyes. He reached for her arm again, and she didn't wait to find out what he wanted to talk with her about. She turned and left him, rushing quickly toward the main elevators. She had to get away. She had to get some fresh air and some space between them so that she could think and refocus her mind.
Naomi made it to the elevators and pressed the button several times, praying hard that one of them would open up soon for her. It did. The doors of the elevator to her right slid open and she rushed inside.
Just as she turned around she saw that Jonathon was coming up right behind her. Panic flushed through her and she jammed her finger on the button to close the doors, but he dashed into the elevator just as the doors were closing.
He was breathing fast and he looked at her in shock and amazement as she turned away from him. They were alone in the box and the moment the doors closed she felt trapped. She had needed space and air more than anything so that she could breathe, but she was as far from that as she could be, alone with him as she was.
Her heart pounded and she began to feel a little dizzy as the box moved downward. She closed her eyes and willed herself not to cry. She was adamant that she would not cry in front of him. He didn't need to see her break down like that, especially over him. Biting her lower lip, she kept her head turned from him, and remained silent.
"What's going on with you? What's wrong?" he asked as his breath began to come back to him. "You left the party without saying anything at all to me; you just vanished, and now today you are acting so distant! You're so … removed! No coffee this morning, not that I expect you to get it, but you just … have been … every day, and I guess I got used to it. You took off for the meeting without me, and then you didn't sit by me when I got there. Not that you have to, you don't … but, you always do! What's going on?" he pleaded as he looked at her in desperation. His heart was in a full blown panic.
He could not begin to understand why it was so important to him that she not turn away from him as she had since he walked into the office that day. He could not begin to reason why she was suddenly so cold, but it was more than he could take, and he wasn't going to let her keep doing it without at least explaining what had changed between them.
Naomi kept her head away and her eyes closed. The tears were there. They were right at the edge of her eyelashes, and it took everything in her to keep them held back. Her heart pounded against her chest and her body felt as though there was a riot going on in her heart to rival the riot going on in her mind.
His hands closed firmly on her shoulders and he turned her toward him. The action surprised her and she gasped and opened her eyes, but as she did, nothing held the tears back and they fell down her cheeks.
He stared at her and shook his head. His voice was soft. "You're … you're crying? What … what happened? Why are you … ?" he could make no sense of it at all.
She tried to pull herself from his grasp, but there wasn't much strength in her. "Let me go." She whispered.
He shook his head. "I can't let you go! I don't want to let you go!" he spoke just above a whisper as he pulled her near to him. "Don't shut me out … whatever is going on with you, please don't shut me out!" he breathed, staring at her bright blue eyes and watching the tears as they rolled down her cheeks. "Please don't cry. I can't see you cry … it hurts me to see it." He said softly as he reached his hand up to wipe the tears away from her cheeks.
The feel of her skin beneath his fingers bound him almost in a trance. He had wanted to touch her for so long that the moment it happened, it magnetized everything in him and he could not resist his feelings for her any longer.
He wrapped his arms around her fully, pressing her against his chest, and he lowered his mouth to hers, kissing her tenderly, feeling the soft fullness of her lips on his. Everything in him sprang to life and he lost himself in her, in their kiss, and in the moment that he had wanted with her for so long.
Naomi could not have been more stunned to find herself in his embrace, pressed against his chest, with his mouth moving gently over hers. She felt like her whole body had gone up in flames and she might melt right where she stood. Her body seemed to react to him without her; her heart pounding, her breath growing shorter, her blood rushing through her like fire, and she let her eyes close as she parted her lips and felt his tongue search for hers.
The air around them warmed just as swiftly as their bodies did, and as he kissed her deeply, his tongue entwined with hers, his lips pressing firmly over her lips, everything in them and around them seemed to catch fire. He moved her backward and pushed her up against the wall, his mouth taking hers over as he moaned and held his body to hers.
Naomi had never been kissed as Jonathon was kissing her, and she felt as if she lost total control, as if she had surrendered everything in herself to him in that moment, and the only thing keeping her tethered to the earth at all was him. She moved her hands to his arms and felt the strength of his muscles there; muscles that were tensed and firm, holding her tightly as their embrace became impassioned. She had no thought in her except him and everything that was happening between them, until the elevator came to a stop and the bell rang.
It seemed to yank her back from a sweet hot dream and into the cold harshness of reality. She pulled away from him, breaking his embrace, and he stared at her with slightly swollen lips and hungry eyes. He shook his head slightly in confusion and she took a step back, her heart aching for what she knew she could not have.
She could not let him hurt her more than he already had. She could not become just another one of his work lovers. She pushed herself away from him fully and turned and bolted out of the elevator, leaving him standing there in a broken daze, staring after her for a moment before he broke into a run and began to chase after her.
Rushing out into the daylight, she was overwhelmed by the chaotic noise of the city. Cars honked and rushed by, people bustled and yelled and talked, machines grinded and banged, and the rhythm of the city around her woke her totally from her reverie; from the steaming dream of being in Jonathon's arms and kissing him.
She heard his voice and turned to look over her shoulder. He was racing to her, calling out her name, but she turned away from him and reached for the door of a cab that was at the sidewalk near her. She climbed in and the cab pulled away from the curb just as Jonathon reached it. She wouldn't let herself look back at him. Instead, she covered her face with her hands and felt the hot tears as they washed her fingers.
Chapter5