The two talk about business matters for a moment. Specifically, the new building, commuting, and Hastings gives her a bullet list of things to do to get everything up and running smoothly. Meanwhile, all I can think about is how I’m going to handle Logan. I have no fucking clue. As I come to that conclusion, Eva turns her gaze on me. “Ready for lunch?”
“What’s on your mind, girlie?” Eva asks as she dips a salty french fry in a pile of ketchup. “I can tell something’s been bothering you.”
For lunch, we’ve settled on an upscale cafe down the street from our new workplace. We’re seated in the middle of the cafe in a small two-person booth. Between the two of us we're enjoying two big burgers, fries, a vanilla shake and a diet Coke. It’s a pretty swanky restaurant, with gleaming marble floors, gold-plated trim and crown molding. I love the burgundy and white color scheme, and the ambience is relaxed.
Too bad I’m a swirling canopy of emotions and can’t calm down and enjoy it.
Should I tell her? I wonder. And would she even believe me?
I grip onto my diet Coke with both hands, debating inwardly. It could look very bad if I told Eva that I slept with Logan in a moment of weakness. I like to think that she’d understand, but I’m not sure I want to risk it.
Don’t, I decide finally. No matter how much I trust her, there’s no telling what could happen if word got out that I slept with the boss.
When it comes down to it, I don’t want Eva to think less of me. She’s been a good friend, my only friend really, and I would hate to lose her at a time where I'm going through so much in my life.
“Nothing,” I say with a sigh, “it’s just this merger is proving to be stressful. The extra commute time, being handed all this responsibility right off the bat. And my breakup with Ian.”
Eva frowns at me and washes down her fry with a slurp of her vanilla milkshake. “I’m sorry, Charlotte. I don’t know why Logan is putting so much pressure on you.” She pauses to dip another fry in ketchup. “Did Ian come get his stuff?”
I nod and then scowl at my untouched burger. I’m such a bundle of nerves that I can’t even think about eating. “Ummm,” I say, “we kind of got into a fight.”
“Kind of?” Eva sits back against the booth. “You’re broken up; what’s there to fight about?”
“Yeah. He wanted back in, but I wouldn’t let him. I mean, can you believe this guy? He thinks he should be able to stay in our apartment after what he did? I ended up throwing all his stuff outside. We started yelling at each other, cursing each other out. Girl, it was awful.”
“Well, at least you got to tell that douche how you really felt.”
“That’s the thing. I’m mad that I did it. It didn’t change anything. He’s not going to say sorry or beg me to take him back. All it did was show how much I still cared.”
Just thinking about the previous night makes me angrier. I still can’t believe Ian hasn’t had the decency to tell me sorry or begged for my forgiveness. After he got caught cheating, his personality took a 180 degree turn. Like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, I’d been sleeping with a stranger the whole time I was with him. And to think that he should be allowed to sleep under the same roof with me after what he did? The nerve of that prick!
Eva reaches across the table and puts a hand on my arm concernedly. “Charlotte, don’t be so hard on yourself. You’re only human. It’s only natural to have those emotions.”
I sniffle, staring at my burger. “You’re right, Eva. I need to stop thinking about it. I wish he’d just move the fuck on so I can let him go live his happily ever after with Sarah.”
I give them two months, I think to myself, before they’re at each others throats and Ian is cheating on her with a new whore. The nasty thought only makes me want to cry. What if it was really me, and not him? What if they do get their happily ever after? I shove down the thought and stuff another fry into my mouth before I cry any more over that asshole.
Eva smiles at me and takes a sip of her vanilla shake. “That’s the spirit. Fuck Ian! You’ll find your own happily ever after with some sex god that’s better in bed than Ian. You’ll see.”
I almost choke on how ironic her words are, though I think a fairytale ending with Logan has zero chance of happening. “I wish.”
Eva sets down her shake and fans herself with both hands. “Oh, oh! Speaking of happily ever afters and sex gods, did you see how hot Logan looked in the boardroom yesterday? My God, that man is pure sex on legs!”