“I knew him. He was a warrior, same as me. And if you gave me the choice between staying behind while others went to war, or laying down my life to see my brothers and sisters safely home, it wouldn’t even be a choice.”
Cass looked up at the ceiling. It was a bond she’d witnessed before, but had never known herself, not outside of her children. “How’s Lil?”
“Glad so many made it home.”
They fell into silence after that. Cass still had many questions, but they seemed to slip through her mind before she could fully grasp them. And while she chased them, a deep and dreamless sleep overtook her.
TWENTY-ONE
When Cass awoke, she knew it was morning from the light streaming in from the high narrow window above her head. She was still on her back, but her mind was sharper, her vision clear. She recognized the room now. The same one she’d been in during their previous stay at the refuge. Wall on her right. And to her left, on the bed across the small room, Wren sat next to Lil. They reacted to her movement; Lil smiled at her, and Wren slid off the bed and timidly approached.
“Hi, Mama,” he said.
“Hey, baby.”
“How are you feeling?” Wren asked.
“Still trying to figure that out. But better, I think.”
“Do you think I could give you a hug?”
“Absolutely.”
Cass held out her arms to him and he came and sat on the edge of her bed. Wren leaned down, gently tested his weight against her. Cass pulled him in tight. He responded by sliding one of his slender arms under her neck and squeezing fiercely, and pressing his face into hers.
“How are you?” she asked. “Are you hurt at all?”
She felt him shake his head against hers.
“I was scared for you,” Wren said. “Mouse said you would be OK, but it didn’t look like it.”
“Mouse was right. I am OK. You don’t need to worry.”
He turned his face into the hollow where her neck met her shoulder, and whispered, “I hate it when you’re hurt, Mama.”
“Well, I’m OK now. How long have we been here?” Cass asked.
Wren finally released her neck and sat back up on the bed. “Just the night. We got back a little before the sun went down. You’ve been sleeping.”
Cass decided to test her strength. She pushed herself up, slowly, to a sitting position. She still felt weak and a little dizzy, but she managed. There were bandages wound around her torso and her right biceps, and covering her left shoulder. She worked her left arm, felt a hollow pang deep, so deep it almost felt like it came from within her shoulder blade. With her fingertips, she gently probed the side of her head, from her hairline backwards. There was a goose egg just above and slightly behind her ear. The skin didn’t seem to be broken. Small comfort.
She drew her legs up tentatively. A burn stretched through her right thigh and made her breath catch. After a moment, she exhaled slowly and patted Wren on the side. He scooted towards the foot of the bed, giving her room to swivel and swing her legs over the edge. She gingerly moved back so she could lean against the wall, and then straightened her legs out again.
The pain was hard to define. It hurt certainly, but the raw edge was missing. Cass wasn’t sure if that was due to the injection Mouse had given her, or if it was a new way her body processed injury. The bandage around her thigh was discolored, like a bruise beneath the cloth, where the wound had oozed, but not enough to soak through.
Once she settled into position, she held up her arm and motioned for Wren. He slid in next to her and cuddled up.
Lil sat across from Cass, watching them together. The smile was gone, but she had a pleasant expression on her face. There was a heaviness in her eyes, though.
“Mouse told me about Elan,” Cass said. “I can’t even begin to express how sorry I am…”
Lil’s gaze dropped for a moment at the mention of his name. But then she gave a nod and looked back up at Cass. “We will all miss him very dearly.” And something in her voice said more, and Cass knew then that there had been more between them than she had previously guessed. More than friendship. Lovers. Perhaps only in secret, or maybe only in their hearts, separated by some other circumstance.
“His son… did I make him an orphan?” Cass asked.
Lil shook her head. “Ephraim’s mother is here with us.”
“How is she?”
“It’s a difficult time for her. Their relationship had been strained for quite a while, and I’m afraid they didn’t part on the best of terms.”
“And how are you?”
Lil hesitated. But she seemed to soften slightly, and after a moment, an unspoken understanding passed between them. “It’s a difficult time for us all.”