More Than Forever(69)

"Yeah? Who the hell doesn't love Back to the Future, right?"

"Where do you live? We can give you a ride." I turn to Lucy, but her gaze is cast downwards, staring at the ground. "Right babe?"

She looks up. "Huh?"

"We can give Roxy a ride home?"

She smiles and looks between Roxy and I. "Of course."

***

Roxy directs us a good twenty minutes out of our way. Lucy stays quiet the entire time while Roxy and I reel off quotes from Back to the Future. She leads us to a street with run down single story, semi-detached houses, and points to one on our right. "This is me."

"I always thought you lived on campus," I tell her.

"You've been thinking about me?"

I see Lucy's grip on the steering wheel tighten.

Saving my ass, I choose not to answer.

"No, C-money, I'm local enough." She opens the door and hops out of the car. "Thanks for the ride, Lucy. I appreciate it."

"You're welcome," Lucy says quietly.

I wait for the door to close before settling my hand on her leg. "Are you okay?"

She nods, but never looks at me.

I don't know what to say so I keep my mouth shut.

We're halfway home before she decides to speak. "So you and Roxy get along well?"

"I guess."

"She seems nice."

"I guess."

"She has a nickname for you."

"I guess."

"She can quote your favorite movie."

"So can a lot of people."

"You spend a lot of time together?"

"We work and have a few classes together, so yeah, I guess."

"Do you guess that she's attractive?"

"What?"

Finally, she glances at me. "She's pretty. You never told me she was pretty. Or sexy. Or, like, a version of you but with a vagina. I bet her vagina's pretty, too," her voice breaks, like she's about to cry.

I lean forward so I can see her face. Yup. Tears. "Pull over."

"No."

"Please, Lucy. Pull over."

"Why? So you can tell me she tried to show you her vagina?"

"Oh my God. Lucy, pull over now."

She finally listens, and pulls the car over, but continues to look straight ahead. I unclip my seatbelt first, and then hers. Reaching up, I move her chin with my finger until she's facing me. "Why are you crying?"

She rubs at her eyes and inhales deeply. Then let's it all out in something that sounds similar to this, "Because I miss you so much and we never get to spend time with each other, not like last year and not like in high school when we spent all our time together, and now all that time is being used up and you're spending it with a girl who's hot, at least ten times hotter than me, and she calls you names and can quote your favorite movie, and all I do is read while you watch that movie, and I'm a shit girlfriend because I should pay attention to the movies you like, and I wish I was hotter and curvier like her, oh my God, do you see her curves? Her body is out of this world and I'm frumpy and stupid and you hate me and you're going to leave me when she shows you her vagina, which is probably a lot sooner than when I showed you mine, and I'm crying because I love you and I miss you and I hate that curvy vagina girl is going to take that from me."

I want to laugh, but I know it's wrong so I keep it in. "Lucy," I start. "Since I saw you sitting on the bleachers at the twin’s game, I've never looked at another girl. Not because I didn't want you to find out, but because I already knew that no other girl would compare to you. I don't care that you can't quote my favorite movie, and you don't care that I don't know what book Will and Layken are from." I do, but I don't tell her because it would just make her feel shittier about herself. "That stuff doesn't matter to us. I haven't done or said anything to ever make you feel the way you're feeling. And I'm sorry if I haven't said or done anything lately to let you know that you shouldn't be feeling what you're feeling. If you're having insecurities, that's my fault, and I'll try to fix it. But you should know that I only ever see you, and only you, and that's the way it's been since we were fifteen."

"Stop it," she whispers, her eyes fixed on mine now.

"Stop what?"

"Stop making me fall in love with you."

I smile now, taking her face in my hands. "I'll never stop that, babe, ever." I kiss her slowly, until I can no longer taste the tears on her lips. Until she knows that she owns every part of me. Forever.

***

I don't know why chicks take so long to get ready. "Babe! I'm sure you look fine, the limo will be here in ten minutes."

"I'm sorry you offered to drive your friend home and now I have to rush," she shouts.