She grips my hand tighter. "What are you scared of?"
"Sharing something like that with someone. It's not just physical. Not for us. That's why we waited so long. But it's not just that. I mean... I have so many questions and I don't know—"
"You have questions?" she interrupts, her voice laced with sympathy.
I nod.
"You can ask me," she says. "Ask me anything."
I look up at her and let the tears fall. "Does it hurt?"
She lets out a small laugh, but not in the mocking sense. More like understanding. "Yes," she states. "I'm not going to lie to you. It does. And to be honest, it probably will the first few times. Don't expect it to feel amazing like they make it out to be. It takes time. Because you're right, it's not just a physical connection you're making. It's emotional. Extremely emotional." She stops to take a breath, and then squeezes my hand again. "Lucy."
I look up at her.
"I know that your mom's not around. I know that she would have been a lot more prepared for these types of conversations than I am, but I want you to be comfortable coming to me. Cameron's not the only one in this family that loves you."
-CAMERON-
"So..." Mark says, taking a sip of his beer.
"So..." I answer, kicking my feet onto the coffee table and doing the same.
We've never had beers together, but he says that this occasion calls for it.
"So..." he says again.
"So..."
He leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees. "I have to ask."
I look up at him.
He raises an eyebrow. "Clitorusaurus-rex?"
I laugh and throw a cushion at his head.
"Ready to go?" Lucy says from the bottom of the stairs.
Mom's eyes narrow at the beer in my hand. "Mark made me," I tell her.
I quickly grab Lucy and haul ass out of there.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
-CAMERON-
"I'm not drinking anymore tonight so I can drive home." I pick up a pink colored drink from the cooler that's set on the kitchen counter. I have no idea whose house we're at. "We call these bitch drinks." I uncap it and hand it to her. "They taste like punch, but they're still alcoholic so just—"
She cuts me off by handing me back the empty bottle. "Or you could just chug it. Either way works."
She smiles. "That was nice. Give me another one."
I uncap another one but hold it behind my back.
She pouts.
"Lucy, listen to me. You keep going like that, you're gonna puke or pass out, and none of those are good times, especially for me."
She steps forward and wraps her arms around my waist, tilting her head all the way back to look up at me.
"So just chill, otherwise you're going to miss the fun of the actual buzz."
"I understand," she coos.
Ten minutes later she's buzzed.
"I told you to cool it," I laugh.
We're out in the yard, taking up a seat on the recently abandoned patio furniture. She's sitting sideways on my lap with one arm around my neck. "Quiet, Cam."
"I said that you—"
"Shh!" She covers my mouth with her hand. "Quiet! I don't want to hear it."
Logan comes and takes a seat opposite us. "How's that liquid courage going, Luce?"
"Fuck you and your liquid courage," she tells him.
His eyes widen.
"You and your liquid courage can suck it."
Logan laughs now. We all do.
Then a random girl approaches him. "I found us a room, you coming?" He doesn't even look surprised; he just stands up and follows behind her.
Lucy's jaw drops to the floor. "Is he? And she? Are they?"
I shrug. "Probably."
She gets off my lap and stands between my legs, resting her forearms on my shoulders. "We should do that," she muses.
"What?" I chuckle. "Have meaningless sex?"
"No." She leans in closer. My hands settle on the back of her thighs, under her skirt, just beneath her ass. Truthfully, I haven't stopped thinking about finishing what we started.
She kisses my cheek, then my neck, and then lightly bites my earlobe. "I want to finish what we started," she whispers.
Instantly, I'm up.
Not just standing, but up.
For a split second, I fight a war against myself. "I don't want to take advantage of you in your state."
"Pssh," she scoffs. "If anyone's going to be taking advantage, it's me... of you..." She reaches up and pulls me down to her; her mouth's already open, waiting for me.
I hold her hand tightly while we walk through the party. The house is filled, and the music's loud. I take her upstairs, where I know it'll be quieter. "Are you sure?" I ask, stepping foot on the landing.
She rolls her eyes and starts knocking on the doors on either side of the hallway. After the fifth one, there's no cussing, no bang of something being thrown against the door. Grinning from ear to ear, she slowly opens it, making sure we're not disturbing anyone. She switches on the light, but it's not a bedroom, it's a bathroom.