More Than Forever(15)

My gaze darts around the room, looking for something to make him get up. There's nothing here, just half empty bottles of whiskey. I take the nearest one and run to his bathroom. Then I empty it and fill it with water. I walk back and stand over his pathetic state and proceed to empty it all over his head. He jerks up. "Kathy," he moans. And for a split second I actually feel sorry for him.

"Get downstairs," I grind out. "Your baby's sick and Lucy needs you."

"Lucy?"

"Lucy. You know... your only daughter. The one that's been keeping this family together since you checked out."

He sits on the edge of the bed and rubs his palm down the side of his face.

"NOW!" I yell. And it seems like he finally comprehends the seriousness of what's happening.

He rushes down the stairs, tripping on the last step. I help him up and push him toward the kitchen. Nothing's changed in the time I was gone.

The front door bursts open. A moment later it feels like a million people fill the kitchen—the paramedics, my mom, and her aunt.

"Lucy." Her dad sways on his feet, watching her crying on the floor. He hasn't even gone to her yet. My fists ball—it's the only way I can keep my rage in check. A tear falls from his eye. "What did you do, Lucy?"

His words alone release the rage and I punch him.

I can tell that it hurts me more than it hurts him because he barely flinches.

I hate him.

Mom yells my name and the boys start shouting.

Lucy screams.

"She didn't do shit," I yell up at his surprised face. "She's done nothing but almost kill herself looking after YOUR kids. She's fifteen! She doesn't need this shit."

"STOP IT!" she shouts. "Please, Cameron! Stop!"

I stop.

We all do.

Even the baby—who's now in the hands of the paramedic. "Sweetheart," she says to Lucy, throwing a hand out to help her on her feet. "He's just teething. It's painful for them. It's normal for them to get a fever... for them to cry. It's all normal." She glares up at Lucy's dad, but her words are meant for Lucy. "You didn't do anything wrong."

Lucy's breath catches before she shoves past everyone and runs upstairs. I go after her but Mom holds me back. "She might just need some time, honey."

I get out of her grasp and ignore her words. Lucy doesn't need time. She needs me. My heart thumps as I take the steps to her room. She's not there, but I can hear her loud cries through her bathroom door. My hands cover the doorknob, but then Mom's words repeat in my head. She might just need some time. I press my ear against the door and listen for any sign that she's okay. And then I hear the one sound that changes everything.

She's vomiting.

I turn the knob and slowly push open the door. She's standing over the toilet with her finger in her mouth.

She's making herself vomit.

"Lucy," I breathe out. "Stop."

Her eyes stay on me, while I watch them turn to stone. Face wet from her tears, she slowly pushes her finger further into her mouth.

I move.

Faster than I thought possible.

I shove her hand out of her mouth and wrap my arms around her, pinning her arms to her body. "No," she cries, but I can feel the strength leaving her. I tighten my hold and bring us both down to the floor. "What are you doing, Luce?" I'm crying. And I don't care. I don't care for anything but her. I grab a towel of the rack and wipe her mouth.

"I just want it stop."

She cries, and I let her.

Her fingers grip my arms so tight I know they'll bruise. But it's nothing compared to the pain I feel for her. She wipes her face on my shirt and looks up at me with an emptiness in her eyes I never want to see again. "I want it to stop, Cameron. Please make it stop."

My eyes drift shut. "Okay, Luce. I'll make it stop. I'll make it better. I promise." And I do. I promise her, and I promise myself, right there and then; I'll make it right.

I carry her to her bed, thankful that I'd spent the last few months hitting the weights. We lay together on top of the covers, with her head on my chest and my arms around her. At some point, she falls asleep. And just like the light inside of her, I watch the daylight outside her window turn to darkness.

*

Mom stands at the doorway of Lucy's bedroom with a frown on her face. We've been in here for hours. I forgot that she was here. I bring my finger to my lips and point to Lucy. She nods and quietly walks over to the bed. "How's she doing?"

"Not good." I try to keep my voice low but Lucy wakes anyway. She sees my mom standing over us and buries her head on my chest.

Mom smiles, but it's sad. "Lucy, honey?"

She starts to cry again. I stroke her hair, hoping it comforts her just a little.

Mom sighs. "Pack a bag, sweetheart. You're going to stay with us for a few days."