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Momentary Marriage(2)

By:Carol Rose


“Come on,” Amy said, dryly. “It’s more than that. At least, for him. Doug’s been following you around for years, waiting for you to realize he’s the one.”

“Not really,” she said, laughing. “I’m just an old habit.”

“You may think that,” her sister said, “but Doug believes he’s in love with you. He wants to marry you.”

“No,” Kelsey protested again. “Not really.”

Amy’s steady gaze held her own. “Are you saying you didn’t know how he felt? That you haven’t noticed?”

Kelsey’s gaze dropped to the stack of work on her desk. She wanted to deny her sister’s assertion, but hearing it said so bluntly startled her into wondering. Hadn’t she known on some level that Doug…cared for her a tad more romantically than she did for him? But surely things weren’t as bad as Amy thought.

Doug had always just been there. When they were kids, he’d cared when they had to leave school and move away and he’d been excited when they moved back.

“We dated a couple of times in high school,” Kelsey reminded her, “but nothing more. You know that.”

“Nothing more because you got interested in that jock on the football team,” Amy told her.

Startled, Kelsey met her gaze. “You remember that?”

“No, I didn’t. But Doug has told me every step of his courting you. Several times.” There was no disguising the pain in Amy's face.

“Geez, that’s sensitive of him,” Kelsey commiserated, trying to comfort her sister while her head still reeled from the information that Amy was in love with Doug.

Two years younger than Kelsey, Amy had always been bright and cheerful, sweet and fun. Now that Kelsey thought about it, her sister would be good for Doug, who tended to take life too seriously.

Amy grimaced. "I'm in love with him, Kelsey, and I think, down deep, he loves me, but he’s been infatuated with you for so long he can’t let go."

Kelsey sat back in her chair, exasperated. “I need to have a talk with that man. There’s been nothing romantic between us for more than a decade. He’s crazy not to see how great you are.”

“If you really want to help,” Amy said, getting up. “Stop giving him crumbs.”

“What?”

Amy sighed. “Look, I don’t want to hurt your feelings, but you keep Doug hanging around at your heels. You call him when you don’t have a date. He helps you with guy-things when you can’t get your super to fix stuff in your apartment. You keep giving him hope.”

Kelsey stared at her in shock. “We’re friends. That’s all.”

“Not to him,” Amy said patiently. “You feel friendly, but he wants to be your knight in shining armor. You’re calling a friend for help, but he wants more, so he takes your relying on him as a sign of something more. I’ve realized lately that he only takes me out when he knows you’re busy. He rushes out and buys you flowers when your latest boyfriend is a jerk. He’s never even bought me flowers. Doug is putting our lives on hold for you.”

“My God,” Kelsey murmured. “You think I actually encourage him to….”

“To follow you around like a puppy? Yes, I do.” Amy put up a hand. “I know you don’t do it intentionally. I just don’t think you see how you’re encouraging him. If you don’t want him, you’ve got to let him go.”

“My God.” Kelsey said again, getting up to take an agitated turn around the tiny office. “This is terrible. You’re my sister. I love you, for God’s sake, and Doug is my friend! I’d never want to hurt either one of you.”

“I know.”

“Sure, I knew he had a little lingering infatuation, a sort of idealized image of me. But I never thought he’d let it get in the way of….” Kelsey tossed the pencil she’d been clutching in the general direction of her desk. “I told Doug years ago that I didn’t love him that way. That I never would.”

“Maybe there’s nothing you can do to convince him,” Amy said, her face suddenly tired. “It’s not like you haven’t dated other men. It’s just that I’ve tried to make him see reality for a year now and I’m getting nothing in return but a broken heart.”

Amy looked away, brushing at her suddenly damp eyes with an angry hand.

“I’m so sorry.”

Amy shook her head. “I can’t blame you totally. I’ve done the same thing with him that he’s doing with you. Following him around all these months, going out with him when he calls at the last minute.”