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Mixed Up(80)

By:Emma Hart


At first, I did. I wished I'd never returned to my hometown and collided with Raven Archer. Now, today, I was glad I had. It was still unexpected and uncertain, but that didn't mean it was wrong. I couldn't believe that it was wrong.

There was no way it was wrong to want someone as badly as I wanted her-uncontrollably.

The fear was still there. The fear that with one choice, I could wreck the best and longest friendship I'd ever had. Not to mention the only truly real one. With success came struggles, and true friendships were one of those struggles.



       
         
       
        

Love was another.

The idea that I might have to sacrifice one for the other was too frustrating to consider. I wasn't in love with Raven, but I knew I was falling fast. There was something about her beyond the snark that was all too endearing.

I turned onto the street. It was still early enough that the sky still held a faintly residual glow of the sunrise, and the orange hue tickled the horizon as I pulled into the driveway.

My car door opened at the moment the neighbor's front door did. Stepping out of my car, I turned in the direction of the Archer house and laid eyes on my best friend.

His eyes were hard. Lips thinned. Jaw set.

The knowledge snaked through me with the guilt of a hundred men.

He knew.

Ryan crossed the yard to where I was standing. He stopped on the other side of my car, his expression unchanged, and said, "I think we need to talk."





CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

Raven





Thirty minutes before.





The sound of Parker's car leaving the lot reverberated through the open window. The sun was rising, lighting the sky up in the most beautiful, colorful way, yet I couldn't appreciate its beauty.

I couldn't appreciate the radiant orange as it colored my kitchen. Couldn't enjoy the golden hue of the rays as they danced off the mirror by the door and bounced around the room as the sun rose.

All I could think of was the way my stomach swirled with the worst uncertainty. Did I really want Parker to shoulder all the blame for him? I was as complicit as he was. I was as much involved as he was. He'd insisted on being the one to have the conversation with Ryan, but that didn't mean I had to sit here and do nothing.

The longer I knew I was sitting here doing nothing while he went to the most awkward conversation of his life, the more I knew I had to do something.

I tugged sweats up over my ass and headed for the door. I'd promised Parker I'd say nothing. I swore I'd sit pretty until I was told to run or that a tornado was headed my way. I wanted to stick with that as much as I wanted to be the person who would tell my brother the truth.

The battle waged inside me as I headed for the bar. I locked my apartment door behind me, pocketing the keys. My phone burned a hole in my pocket, bumping against my thigh with every step I took. It was my focus as I bent down in front of the first fridge with my notepad and clicked my pen.

I needed six Budweisers. Four Coors. Six and nine light beers respectively.

Was Parker in Key West yet?

Did my brother know?

Could I cope with this?

I shook my head. I scooted across to the next fridge. Orange. Apple. Cranberry. I needed all the juice. 

I couldn't let Parker take the rap for this. I had to step forward and take responsibility for this.

Standing, I grabbed my phone from the bar. My brother's name stared back at me from the screen, his dreadful Facebook profile photo filling the little square.

Parker's dark eyes flashed in my mind.

The need to be the one to tell Ryan nudged at me yet again. Was I a bad person if I didn't? He was my brother. If the situation was switched I'd be annoyed.

I had to tell him.

I grabbed my phone.

Selected Messages.

Tapped Ryan.

Hit the bar.





Me: Are you awake?

Ryan: Early start. Sup?





I was going to be sick.





Me: I'm seeing Parker.





It flashed up on the screen. Stayed put like the asshole it was. I stared at the screen until the other bubble popped up.





Ryan: Outside of work?





Shit.

I swallowed.





Me: Yes.





Five minutes passed as I stared at my phone.

He didn't reply.

I hoped like hell I'd done the right thing.





CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

Parker

Right now.





"You're right. We do need to." I stuffed my hands in my pocket.

It was obvious that Raven had beaten me to it. I think I knew she would. She simply didn't have the capability inside her to lie to her brother the way our relationship required her to. It was pretty obvious that the moment I'd left this morning she'd texted Ryan.

"The back?" Ryan nodded his head to the alley that separated our back yards.