“I’m proud of you for trying to be a better man than me. I hope you get out of this mess, hope you get the girl.”
“Not exactly the tongue I want to taste.” Using the back of my hand, I wiped Bandit’s slobber from my mouth. It was the third day in a row I’d come to take my new buddy for a walk. Jay was officially dead, and Dex was too big of a pansy ass to come clean to Bianca, so the only connection I had to Georgy Girl was a hundred-pound, shit machine whose breath smelled like ass. Sadly, he was the best friend I had at the moment.
“What are we gonna do, buddy?” I was sitting on the park bench again, and Bandit sat down facing me. Perhaps I was losing my sanity, but when he quirked one ear up, I could have sworn he was listening—wanted to help me solve my woman problems. “Have you ever lost your shit over a woman? Done something really stupid that you couldn’t figure out how to make it right? I don’t know…maybe take a bitch’s bone and bury it when she wasn’t looking?”
Bandit lifted his paw and swatted my knee. I took that as a yes. Bandit was a bone thief. “You did, huh? Did you come clean and win her heart in the end?”
Bandit opened his mouth and let out a big yawn, then rested his long face on my lap.
“I’m even boring a dog with my life.” I scratched his head and sighed. “I just don’t know what to do. How do I explain why I kept up the charade for so long? Admit that I was afraid she wouldn’t like me if I was who I really am? Or admit that I really am the asshole she thought I was and that she probably wouldn’t like me much if we’d met under other circumstances?” The truth was, that was what I was really afraid of—that once she got to know the real me, she’d smarten up and find herself an honest bike messenger.
It was almost eight, and I was already an hour later than I should have been getting to the office, so I walked my new best friend back to the shelter. Suzette wasn’t around when I’d arrived an hour ago but was now working the counter. “Mr. Truitt. I’m glad I caught you. I wanted to let you know that Bandit is getting relocated to our farm upstate at the end of this week.”
“A farm?”
She offered an unconvincing smile. “We can only keep dogs in the shelter here in the city for so long—after three months they go upstate for retirement if they aren’t adopted.”
“Upstate? A farm? Are you saying what I think you’re saying?” I’d had a dog that went to the so-called farm once when I was a kid. I remember the day I’d told my friend that Buster had gone to have a better life on a farm. He’d set me straight on what the farm really meant.
Suzette’s smile was real. “God, no. It’s not like that. Our farm is a nice place. A woman named Allison runs it—she’s pretty amazing, actually. The only downside is the animals don’t get as much interaction with people as they do here in the city where we get lots of volunteers. But it’s a nice farm, and the dogs have room to run during the day.”
When I looked down at Bandit, he was staring up at me. Don’t give me those sad eyes. It’s a real farm. Not the proverbial farm parents used to make naïve children feel better. Didn’t you hear the woman? I kneeled down and rubbed the top of his head. “You take care of yourself. Okay, buddy?” For some reason, it felt like I was saying goodbye to the last part of Bianca I was holding on to. After a few minutes, I stood and offered Suzette the leash.
When she took it, Bandit refused to move from my side.
Suzette made kissy sounds. “Come on, Bandit. Time for Mr. Truitt to go.”
The damn dog didn’t budge, even when Suzette gave the collar a light tug.
“I’m sorry. They bond very quickly. Let me go grab his favorite toy.”
She disappeared and came back a few minutes later squeaking a toy bone. That got his attention. “Come on, Bandit.” Squeak. Squeak. “Say goodbye to Mr. Truitt.”
I looked down at my trusty friend—my keeper of secrets—to say goodbye. But instead it wasn’t what I said at all. I wasn’t even sure who put the fucking words in my mouth that I vomited out. All I know is that I wasn’t ready to let go of the last piece of Bianca just yet. And…I’d lost what was left of my mind.
“I’d like to adopt Bandit.”
“What the…?”
My brain was seriously screwing with me. As I walked down 21st Street lost in thought about Dexter Truitt, the guilt I’d been feeling for thinking about him while I was kissing Jay the other night must have really started to get to me. I blinked my eyes into focus watching from a distance while a tall, dark, handsome man who looked an awful lot like Jay Reed was getting into the back of a fancy Town Car. From a block away, the man really looked like Jay, only he was wearing a three-piece suit and helping a greyhound jump into a car, rather than riding a bicycle. I laughed to myself how nutty my imagination could be sometimes and watched the dark car pull away from the curb as I made my way to Forever Grey.