Mayhem (Deathstalkers MC #5)(28)

The bowls and plate balance precariously on his arms, but still I stay still. "I want you to eat all of it." He places the bowl in front of me and also fills a plate with the other stuff. "Start without me. I need to make a call."

He walks out of the room and I pick up the fork in front of me. Having someone feeding me, not needing to worry about the placement of the silverware and plates, it all feels so foreign but it also feels right. The moment the first bite hits my lips I become ravenous. By the time he walks back into the room a few minutes later, the bowl is empty. His eyes widen. "Guess you were hungry." He laughs as he sits down at the table.

I eat some of the fruit while he starts on his lunch. It's been so long since I've been able to eat different things that I don't even notice him looking at me until I put the last cookie in my mouth.

"You need things. If you don't feel like anything at that house is yours, then we'll get you your own things." His hand scrubs over his face, smoothing out the stress lines. "I didn't think taking you to a store to shop would go very well. Lucy and a few of the other girls are going to pick some things up for you, just for now. Eventually, I want to take you out and buy you whatever you like."

I stare at him. Gifts come with conditions, guidelines, repayments.

He doesn't say anything else and it strikes me as odd.

He's a quiet eater, I think to myself. Dylan was noisy-messy, even. "What do you want me to do?"

He pauses, his fork halfway to his mouth. "You mean now?" 

I shake my head. "You are getting me these things, what would you like me to do in return?"

He doesn't answer immediately. The scraping of his fork against the bowl as he simply pushes the food around fills the air. "I want to do things for you, Jasmine."

He stands up bringing his bowl to the sink. I look up, holding my breath. "But when I do these things, I don't want anything from you in return."

I stand up and follow him to the sink, taking his bowl out of his hands and reaching for the sponge. He sighs, leaning back against the cabinets, looking at the ceiling. The sound of running water fills the silence between us.

"Jasmine, you don't have to do this. You aren't here to clean up after me. This isn't like it was before."

"I want to." I offer him a tiny smile. "You made lunch."

His face softens and he nods. "I'm going to shower. When I come out I want you to be sitting on the couch. Turn the TV on and find something for us to watch. Do not try to put on something you think I might like. I'll know if you do."

"Okay," I say and he turns and walks down the hallway.

Moving around a kitchen again feels good. The fact that it isn't my kitchen doesn't really register until I have to search around for where Cutter keeps things. Everything has its place, at Dylan's house, but this kitchen feels lived in. I smile when I open a drawer and find it bursting with takeout menus, all of it junk food. Cutter obviously wasn't kidding when he said he couldn't cook.

Never mind. I can show him how. Perhaps that's one of the ways I can show my appreciation.

I wash the few dishes that we made before drying them and putting them away. Finding something to watch, however, is not an easy task as clearing up. When I walk over to the couch and turn on the TV, pushing the button that says guide, tons of titles fill the screen. I haven't even heard of half of them. I didn't watch TV at home, and all Dylan ever watched was the sports channel. My lips quiver. The past five years I have lived in a bubble, hidden from everything. Now that bubble has been popped and it almost feels like I'm suffocating.

I hear footsteps in the hallway and click on a random channel.

A vacuum cleaner commercial is playing when Cutter walks into the room. He smiles at me. "Whatcha watching?" He sits down next to me, ignoring the obvious choice of the comfortable recliner.

I bite my lip.

He picks up the remote and then starts to laugh. "Infomercials? Really?"

I shrug.

"Any reason? Or you just like to watch them?"

Should I tell him? I decide that I need to be honest, I don't want to lie to him. "I actually just randomly picked this. I haven't watched any TV, other than sports, for years. I really had no idea what to pick."

He is quiet for a minute. "Okay then, maybe I'll find something." I watch him out of the corner of my eye, the bright screen casting a blue hue over his skin, making him look strange. He flips through the guide and lands on a channel. "This movie is funny. I think you might like it."

I lean against the back of the couch and tuck my feet underneath me.

"Cold?" he asks. I shrug, not wanting to be any bother.

Cutter's weight leaves the couch and he leans over to grab a blanket from the recliner. "Here." I freeze as he leans over me, tucking the thick material in around my thighs, his hands brushing me. It's been so long since a person looked after me, since a man touched me in a way that wasn't designed to cause pain.