“It hurts. My stomach still feels wobbly,” she murmured as she blew on her tea after stirring honey in it.
Richard knew of something that might make her feel better but waited until she was through with her tea. They sat in comfortable silence while she sipped the hot brew.
He hoped she wouldn’t think he was crazy for suggesting it as he said, “Would you like me to rock you?” He gestured with his thumb to the big rocking recliner in the living room.
Maya looked up at him, and her eyebrows knit together. She seemed pale and fragile to him, but his heart leaped in his chest when she smiled and nodded. He put her empty mug in the sink and walked over to the big recliner and sat down. She followed and didn’t hesitate when he opened his arms to her.
He eased her gently into his lap, barely suppressing a groan as she cuddled up to him. He knew she didn’t feel good because she was usually playful and talkative. He sometimes didn’t know what to say for fear of sounding like a dunce, whereas conversation seemed to come easily for her. She rested her cheek against his chest and melted into him as he began rocking her and stroking her back. She was like a kitten curled in his arms.
“I don’t think I’ve been rocked since I was a little girl.”
“Am I going too fast?”
“No, it’s perfect.” The drawn-out, expressive tone she used in the last word made him smile, and he was glad now that he’d suggested it.
Richard made a vain attempt to distract himself and keep his swelling cock from turning into a full-blown hard-on, which she must’ve been aware of beneath her hip. Her body was warm and pliant, and the delicate scent of her just-shampooed hair was making him harder by the moment. He was painfully aware of how velvety her fingertips were as she stroked his biceps.
“Do you miss her, Richard?” Her soft-spoken voice was hesitant and had a poignant quality to it.
He shut his eyelids, not sure he wanted to go there yet. “Yeah. Sometimes I miss her very much.” In his mind’s eye, he could still see Michelle’s face, the way her eyes would light up whenever she looked at him.
“I’m sorry she was taken from you.” She stroked his arm in a soothing fashion.
“I’m sorry about Morgan, too, honey.”
“Richard?”
“Hmm?”
“Do you ever feel lonely?”
“Well, I have Kendall and Boone, so no, not lonely but…” If he said he missed physical affection she would think he meant sex. He did, but not under these circumstances.
She slid her good hand around his back and squeezed lightly. “I’ve missed the simple, physical connection and intimacy.”
Richard nodded. “Yeah. Having someone to touch and hold.”
Maya looked up at him, and the vulnerability in her eyes made him feel protective of her. She asked, “Do you think we’ll ever get over losing them?”
Rocking slowly, he lifted a damp lock of her golden-blonde hair and caressed its silky length between his forefinger and thumb. “I remember when they told me she’d died on the operating table. I wanted to die, too. I felt that way for a long time.”
“Me, too,” she whispered, and he saw her lip tremble before she pressed her face to his chest.
Hoping the words came out right, Richard said, “I know she and Morgan would want us to live our lives and be happy. I want, I mean, I’m ready—” Shit.
“To try and love someone else?” she asked, stroking his pectoral muscle. “Even though it hurts to think of it?”
“Yeah.”
She sat there with him, asking no more questions, just stroking him until her movements gradually stilled and she fell sound asleep. Richard would’ve gladly sat there holding her until morning, but Kendall and Richard arrived a short while later.
“She okay?” Boone asked, fingering a lock of her drying hair.
“Wiped out. I don’t think she feels well,” Richard whispered.
Kendall pressed the backs of his fingers to her forehead and said, “Her temperature feels normal. You want to put her to bed?”
Richard didn’t say it, but in his heart he didn’t want to part with her when she was like this. Her sweet, solid weight against him was the most satisfying thing he’d felt in years.
Proving his uncanny ability to read his brothers, Kendall said, “I’m dog-tired, but if you’re worried, you’re both welcome to bed down with us. It might be a little crowded, but the offer stands.”
Boone looked at Richard and smiled, saying, “I think she’s in good hands. Richard, I’ll switch with you during the night, so you can get a little shut-eye.”
Richard nodded and carefully rose from the recliner with her in his arms. She stirred slightly and shifted so that her nose and lips were pressed against his neck. She made a barely perceptible happy-sounding noise. A pleasant shiver raced down his back at the contact. They put her in bed and propped her freshly bandaged hand on a pillow then got themselves ready for bed. Boone said goodnight, and Richard got comfortable on his side facing her while Kendall took the other side.