Once I was between them I felt myself relax, the heat still simmering, but tolerable. It was the feel of Chase and Xavier’s big bodies cocooning me that had me falling asleep. But I couldn’t shake of the feeling that there was something going on, and it was big.
****
The following morning
I’d woken up to Chase and Xavier gone, the bed cold beside me, and my heart dropping to my stomach. They’d left a note, something about us needing to talk, but it seemed so impersonal and distant after what we’d shared the night before.
I know I shouldn’t have expected more out of them, more from them, but it was hard not to have wishful thinking concerning the ones you loved. The burn of the heat was faded, and I breathed out at how good it felt to feel a little like myself again.
Go for a walk.
Go to the grocery store.
Hell, go and get a drink even though it’s not even noon.
Anything had to be better than hanging out in the house where it still smelled like the sex I’d had with the bears.
I grabbed my keys and headed out of the cabin. There as a chill in the air, the promise of fall coming up tickling my senses.
I stepped off my porch, making my way to the car, and figuring if anything I’d just drive around … get away from all of this, especially from Chase and Xavier.
“Ophelia?”
I turned around, and looked at Graham. His auburn hair was disheveled, and his face was flushed. I could tell he had been for a run, could smell the adrenaline pumping through his body still.
“How are you?”
I smiled. “Fine, you?”
He nodded. “Good.” There was a moment of silence. “I’m sorry, you look like you’re on your way out.” He eyes my eyes and purse.
“Just a drive.”
He nodded, the silence stretching again. “We haven’t really talked much.”
No, we hadn’t, but then again we both kept to ourselves, Graham even more than I did.
After several more seconds he finally spoke again. “I just wanted to know if maybe you’d like to have dinner tomorrow night?”
My first instinct was to decline, because even having a friendly diner seemed wrong. I hesitated, and I saw the disappointment flash through his eyes.
“I’m sorry I asked. It was presumptuous.” He turned to leave, and I held my hand out, feeling like a bitch.
“No, wait, Graham.”
He stopped and turned to face me.
“Diner sounds nice.” I told myself it would get me out of the house, and get my mind of things and certain people.
His smile was huge. “Great. I’ll get in touch in the next day to finalize things.”
I could hear the excitement in his voice, and probably should have told him this was friendly, something to help me keep my mind off other things. But I wouldn’t be rude.
So, forcing myself to push all thoughts of what and who I wanted out of my mind, and said, “That sounds really nice, Graham. Just let me know.” It wasn’t like I had shit to do anyway.
I watched him leave, and couldn’t help but think about where my life was headed. I turned, went back into my cabin, shut the door, and finally let myself break down and cry for the first time, knowing that this would probably be the hardest thing to get over.
Chase and Xavier would have to be put in the deepest, darkest recesses of my mind, because hoping for anything else would just break my heart all over again.
Chapter Five
The mating heat had been sated.
It was nearly two days later, and I hadn’t heard from Chase or Xavier. They didn’t have any obligation to reach out to me, though. They’d helped me out, done their “job” in making me comfortable and relaxed, and for that I was thankful. Even though things hadn’t worked out the way I had always dreamed about, the fact was I was glad they’d been the ones to help me through my first mating heat.
I hadn’t run, hadn’t shifted in a while, and it sounded like it might help release some of this energy in me. And dusk was a beautiful time to run free.
I grabbed a bag that I could put my clothes into before I shifted, and headed outside. I headed down the path that led away from the community and then veered off into the wilderness. I didn’t stay on the path as I went deeper into the forest, needing this time to myself.
Setting my bag down and stripping, I shoved my clothes in the bag, closed my eyes, and willed myself to calm enough to shift into my wolf. It was then I felt the change take hold of me.
Like electricity running through me, my bones broke and realigned, my muscles stretched, and I felt a wave of gray fur cover me. I landed on four legs, stretched and then shook, and felt the strength of my wolf run through me.
And then I took off.
I ran for a long time, weaving through the trees, feeling the wind move along my coat, and listened to the sounds around me. Small animals scurried away, and ran up trees, birds chirped above me, and the breeze blew the leaves on the canopy that covered me. It was freeing, exhilarating, and I felt better after doing this.