He clearly desired her, but he was still fighting it. It must be hurting him. To be feeling an attraction for her so soon after he gave his word of honor to another. He didn't know she was the masked woman, and he would feel like he was being disloyal.
She felt moved to approach him, to tell him who she was and to stop his guilt, but she couldn't. She wouldn't.
She didn't want him to want her because she was some mystery woman that he had pledged himself to. If he pledged himself to her, she wanted him to know who she was, to know her and to still want her.
Then, and only then, would she tell him who she was.
CHAPTER 5
After two days of enduring the sight of Lady Victoria cornering the duke, Aubrey had had enough. With the occasional longing looks that Bradford had sent her before cutting them off and regaining his composure, Aubrey was ready to run back to London.
"Bitsy, please go to the stables and have a horse readied immediately. I wish to ride."
"Shall I request a groom to accompany you?"
"Yes."
After yanking off her gloves, she fished out a dark blue riding habit.
"Would you like some help dressing? I'm sure it will take Bitsy a while to get to the stables." Charlotte tossed the book she was reading on her bed and reached for the dress to unfasten the few buttons at the back of the neck that held the material together.
"Thanks."
"Feeling stifled?"
Aubrey nodded stiffly. What else was there to say? Besides the masquerade, there wasn't anything else to tell. True, the duke had been looking at her with passion in his eyes, but it wasn't anything more than what her sister received on a daily basis.
Charlotte helped pull Aubrey's dress over her head before settling the shining blue material in its place. "I don't blame you. I think everyone is a bit disgusted with Lady Victoria's advances. Not only is she corning the duke every chance she gets, but she also seems determined to keep all the other men on her string." She made a sound of pure disgust. "How she happens to have a brother as decent as Viscount Lawrence, I'll forever have to wonder."
Her sister began to fasten the impossibly long row of buttons down her back. "Lord Lawrence? I had not known you were very well acquainted with him."
"Oh, I'm not." In the mirror, Aubrey caught sight of a blush on her sister's cheeks. "I'm just basing my opinion on the few moments when we were introduced and from what I have seen of his character thus far."
It was strange that her sister was a bit flustered, but Aubrey didn't press it. "Yes, now that you mention it, I am quite surprised too. I guess with his many businesses the ton hasn't had very much opportunity to get to know him. In any case, he doesn't seem the type to haunt the London ballrooms."
"True," her sister said, seeming distracted. "There. All finished."
Aubrey shifted in her dress, trying to settle it in a comfortable position. "Excellent. I feel as if I will explode if I'm forced to stay indoors for too much longer."
Charlotte grinned. "Will you be home for luncheon? I'm sure mother will want to know."
Fastening her matching gloves, Aubrey nodded. "I expect so." Aubrey gave her sister one last smile before heading toward the door.
"Have fun," her sister called out to her as she left.
It didn't take her too long to get to the back of the house, close to the stables. It was mainly quiet throughout the manor at this time in the morning, as the guests opted to spend the early hours relaxing in their rooms after staying up so late.
The servants were up though. It seemed as if their lives never slowed, their work never ceased. Aubrey was always grateful she had been born into wealth, knowing that the life of a servant was a difficult one, and she tried to never take her servants for granted. She knew that her life was an easy one because of their hard work, and she was grateful to them.
The sun was shining brightly as she walked outside. The warmth of the sun's rays instantly gave heat to her skin. The world always looked so fresh and clean in the country, a stark contrast to the dirty and constantly smoggy city of London.
While London was captivating with its glittering parties and smooth sparkling stone, it had nothing to compare to the beauty of the lush rolling green hills and the crystalline sky of the country.
Turning the corner, Aubrey sighed in delight at the snowy white mare that was saddled, knowing that was her mount.
"What a beauty you are," she whispered to the animal as she petted his nose. The gorgeous creature seemed to agree and nuzzled deeper into her hand. A soft laugh escaped her lips.
"She's breathtaking."
The deep, masculine voice startled her out of her focus on the animal. Her gaze jerked up, locking onto the gold flecks in the duke's eyes. She wanted to sigh and lay her forehead against the horse's, but didn't. In habit, she curved her lips slightly, trying to appear at ease. "Yes, she is. I was just telling her that very same thing."
A stable hand exited the stable at that moment, leading a glossy black stallion that seemed to be chomping at the bit. "I am sorry my lady, I wasn't able to ready another horse yet for a groomsman. Give me a moment and I will see to it," he said, handing the reigns of the horse to the duke.
"That won't be necessary. I shall accompany her this morning," he told the stable hand before turning toward her. "If that is agreeable to you, of course."
The warring emotions made her feel sick. She wanted to be alone, wanted to be able to get away from everything and calm her emotions a bit. But the opportunity to be alone with him, to get to know him without being interrupted by Lady Victoria or anyone else, was too good to pass up.
"Of course."
"Allow me." He moved to help her onto her mount and she closed her eyes as his scent slammed into her. The smell of sandalwood and his soap was so powerful she thought she would fall into his arms then and there. All the sensations she had felt the night of the masquerade came rushing back to her, the feeling of her heart beating so heavily she thought it would fall out of her chest, the feel of his lips on hers, his hair in her hands.
The feelings assaulted her, and the desire that ripped through her again must have shown through her eyes, because his were suddenly darker, more dangerous.
He had to feel the same pull between them.
Hands at her waist, she wasn't sure if he was going to lift her onto the horse or into his arms. Recklessly, she wanted to be against him. To feel his hard muscles against her curves one last time.
With a sound of frustration that seemed to rip from his soul, he lifted her easily onto the back of her mount.
"I'll follow your lead." His voice sounded a bit husky.
With a nod, she led her horse off quickly. She needed a moment alone, a moment to gather her composure.
She cursed. One touch from him and she had melted, ready to give him all. And she couldn't. She wouldn't. It was ridiculous that she was competing with herself. But she wanted to win. She wanted to win as Lady Aubrey, not as the irresistible, desirable, masquerade woman.
If all she could have was this short time alone with him, she would take it. Take it and relish it. He was hers, if only for a morning.
After fifteen minutes at a gallop, she reigned in her horse. Her breath calm, a serene smile on her face, she turned to allow him to pull up beside her.
"I was wondering if you planned to leave me in the dust the entire morning," he smiled ruefully.
She couldn't help but chuckle. "It did cross my mind. I apologize, but I am unused to company on my rides. I find that my mind wanders, and I am not much for conversation."
"It is not a problem. I am mostly the same way. My mind fixes to problems that I haven't been able to solve. I've always found it astonishing that flying at neck breaking speeds gives me a clarity of thought that I can't find anywhere else."
"Yes, exactly." She gave him a true smile of pleasure. It wasn't often that someone had that same experience while riding. Speaking with others throughout the years, she had found that she was singular in that aspect. "I have not met another who shares that trait."
He leaned forward in his mount, relaxed, looking over the landscape before returning to her. "Now you have. Care to race to the second hill?" He nodded off in the direction to a hill a few miles away.
Eyeing the distance, she turned and gave him a bright smile. "Catch me if you can," she said before quickly bringing her horse into a full gallop. The laugh bubbled out of her chest at the priceless expression on his face as she left him in the dust.
She raced ahead, enjoying the exhiliration that coursed through her. The world was a blur of colors as she flew over the ground on the horse's back. Nothing compared to this. Nothing.
Except kissing the duke.
The countryside swirled in a collage of colors that made no sense, the crisp smell of wet grass and cold wind mingled with the sweeter smell of the wildflowers that grew sporadically across the hills. Their lazy violets, flirting pinks, and cheerful yellows combined with the sun made the landscape look like a dream, rosy and perfect.