Marriage Made on Paper(22)
“Really?” he asked, genuine interest in his voice.
Crap. She was sharing again. “I like privacy.”
“I understand that.”
Gage fully understood the need for privacy. Having a child—his sister—live with him for eight years had severely limited his privacy, dictating who he could have over and when. What sort of activities he could indulge in. Of course, now that Maddy was on her own, he could have women over if he chose to, but he’d gotten so used to going to hotels when he wanted sex that he’d never really adapted back.
And now that he had the privacy he wanted, the house felt empty sometimes. He still didn’t want to share it with any of his mistresses. He didn’t need women leaving toothbrushes on his sink. It was a level of commitment he had no desire to pursue. He had nothing to offer a woman beyond a little mutual fun in the bedroom, and he didn’t see the point in making her believe otherwise. That was why neutral locations reigned supreme in his book.
Although, having Lily stay here with him didn’t bother him at all. But then, Lily wasn’t his mistress, and she also didn’t seem like she knew how to cling or simper, which made her seem like a much safer houseguest.
“I live alone, too,” he added.
“I like it,” she said.
“So do I.”
“I need a shower,” she said, abruptly. Then her pale cheeks turned a delicate raspberry.
He couldn’t help but picture her naked in the shower, water sluicing over all that pale skin as it grew rosy from the heat. He felt an ache start to build in his groin. Maybe she wouldn’t be the most convenient houseguest. Not if he wanted to keep things professional between them. Although he was starting to wonder why it mattered. He was trying to be decent. It seemed a little bit on the shady side to hit on a woman whose paychecks you signed. But decency was starting to seem less important.
Then she lowered her eyes, her blush intensifying, and he remembered why making a move on her was a bad idea. She wouldn’t just be another good time. She was more than that. If she were the kind of woman who would have said she needed a shower and, instead of blushing, had given him a sultry look and invited him to join, then he would have been more than willing to forget professionalism then and there.
But she wasn’t that woman. Despite the air of confidence she gave off most of the time, all it took was a touch, or a small moment of sexual tension, and the confidence melted away. She either stiffened and moved away or she blushed like an innocent. He didn’t want to deal with any of that. He couldn’t. He had plenty to offer women in the way of gifts and physical pleasure. But he didn’t want marriage or love, he didn’t see the point.
His career was too important, and he’d put it on the back burner for eight years. He wouldn’t do it again. Not for a wife or a child. It wouldn’t be fair to him, or them. A wife and child didn’t deserve to be second. He and Maddy hadn’t deserved to be second. But they had been. A very distant second. He refused to put a children through what his parents had subjected Maddy and him to. He wouldn’t make them wonder what they could do to earn some attention, to gain a small about of their parents’ interest.
That meant marriage was not an option.
“I’ll meet you for dinner,” he said, his voice rough with arousal.
She nodded jerkily. “Okay. See you then.”
He turned to leave the room, fighting the urge to turn and take her in his arms and kiss her, to find out if she would be stiff against his lips, or if she would be soft and pliant.
He wanted her soft and pliant, more than he could remember wanting any woman in his life. It didn’t matter that his head knew she was the wrong woman to get involved with. His body wanted her.
He tried to conjure up an image of Penny, his last mistress, the mistress he had parted ways with a very distant six months ago. He couldn’t. The only woman his body wanted was Lily.
When Lily emerged an hour later she was back in her business attire, hair pinned back, makeup expertly applied. Her lipstick was a paler rose than her typical color, coordinating with her new manicure and her sky-high stilettos.
Her endless supply of colorful high-heeled shoes never failed to fascinate him. Her work wardrobe was neutral, black and gray, with the occasional brown. But she wore a rainbow on her feet. He’d dated women that wore shoes like that, but mixed with garish jewelry and flashy dresses. Their entire look was so obvious that nothing stood out. Lily knew how to dress for impact. And with a figure like hers, everything short of a burlap sack had pretty major impact. Although, he imagined a burlap sack might even pack a punch with Lily’s curves to complement it.