“Colleen’s got some bad gas,” Brad says nonchalantly like it’s an everyday thing. My face turns beat red. I don’t care if it is just James or not—it’s still embarrassing and damn it to hell—half of the stench in this place is Brad.
“Did you knock my sister up, bro? Darla had bad gas with each of our kids,” James muses as Brad leads him into the kitchen. They’re chatting back and forth about “Darla’s monster farts” as James calls them but I can’t really tune into it. James’s off-handed comment about being pregnant has thrown me off. I try to calculate the time since my last shot but my memory is fuzzy. It was definitely before Vegas.
“I don’t know. Maybe,” Brad says. I hear something drop in the kitchen and pull myself from my thoughts.
“Are you for real?” James asks. Brad laughs—loudly.
“Yeah, for a little while now,” he confirms. I can hear James’s gasp loud and clear. “Can we keep it between us? I don’t want Colleen freakin’ out. You know how they all are. It’s bad enough right now that our parents run around and rub her stomach. She doesn’t need crap from our friends, too.” I’m actually a little impressed with him right now. He’s standing up for me.
“So, you guys are actually trying for a baby or something?” James asks.
“I don’t know. I think Colleen’s on something but she doesn’t talk about it and I don’t ask. If I knock her up she can’t leave me right,” Brad says firmly. My jaw drops. Is he serious? I remember his comment on the way home from the airport.
I can’t wait until we have kids and can have a van that smells like old cheese.
At the time I thought he was insane, but that feels like a lifetime ago. Images of rowdy little boys with Brad’s hair flood my imagination. The thought makes me smile.
“I told you, you could have knocked her up years ago and spared yourself all this hardship,” James says. Just because he and Darla had a pregnancy scare back in high school and mom and dad sat him down and told him that if she was pregnant that he would have had to marry her—James now thinks impregnating women is the most effective way of keeping them around. If I didn’t know him, I’d think he was a major creeper who possibly needed to be locked up.
Walking back into the room, James is carrying a package of flour and a six pack of beer. He holds them up for my benefit. “Flour’s for Darla and the beer’s for me. She drives me to drink when we have one of these family things. Thinks she’s got to out-do the corner bakery.” I smile and laugh. That’s my Darla. She definitely goes all out.
“So, you looking to be pregnant or what?” James asks, giving me the eye. Air leaves my lungs and I feel like I’m been knocked in my windpipe. Brad snorts but then looks at me and he stands up straight, giving me a look that is unreadable.
“I’m not looking to be anything, James,” I defend and roll my eyes trying to shrug it off. If I freak out about my potentially lapsed birth control shot then Brad will, too; and that’s no good. I smile at them both. James seems placated by my response but the husband is giving me a knowing look. As he walks James to the door, I hurry out of the room. I rush upstairs to hide from him even though he’ll find me; this at least buys me a few moments of peace, but not for long. A few words are exchanged and Brad closes the front door. I hear his footsteps on the stairs.
“Ah, come on, stink. Don’t hide from me. You know he was only joking!” I crawl into bed and hide my face under my pillow trying to think things through. How could I have been so reckless with something so important? It’s not like we’ve ever used a condom. Come to think of it, I never even thought about a condom or birth control until this moment. I had stayed on the shot for the convenience of it, despite not needing birth control. I suppose that it should have been more of a priority, but clearly it wasn’t. My brain thinks over the time frame and I realize that my shot would have been wearing off right around my birthday. And it’s then that I remember I was supposed to reschedule my doctor’s appointment because it interfered with our trip, and I just didn’t remember.
CHAPTER TWENTY TWO
(Brad)
Of course, I love you.
“AH, COME ON, stink. Don’t hide from me. You know he was only joking!” I shout, rushing up the stairs. As I walk into the bedroom, I find Colleen curled up underneath the covers. I crawl in behind her and wrap my arms around her waist. Her head is beneath her pillow. She refuses to move it.
“Why are you hiding from me?” I ask, somewhat afraid of what the answer might be.