Marital Bitch(49)

“Before you eat baby, you might want to take one of these.” Colleen smirks and tosses me a prescription bottle. I look at the label. Viagra. Oh, she’s hilarious. The label is obviously homemade. My pharmacy prints my middle initial on the bottle and this label doesn’t have that. Yeah, Viagra my ass.

“My wife is funny,” I laugh and hold the bottle up so the boys can see it. “She thinks I need Viagra.” They all start laughing. Colleen bites her lip and stomps her foot, obviously annoyed that I’m not buying it.

“Baby,” she whines, “how do you expect us to conceive Bradley Jr. if you don’t take your little pill first? Come on, baby. Let’s have a nooner!” she says with faux enthusiasm and rubs her belly. Yeah, like this is going to embarrass me. I smile and wink at her.

“Oh, baby, that’s not how you talk in bed.” I puff my chest out because yeah, I know I’m a stud and if she wasn’t on the pill or whatever, she would be knocked up by now.

“My ears!” James shouts. I look at him to laugh but my dad is standing behind him and even he looks disgusted. Maybe that was too much?

“Well,” Colleen challenges, “I’m ovulating. So go ahead, pop your little blue pill so we can get on it. Will ya?” I smirk at her and open the lid. Her eyes grow wide. I know she’s faking it. These things have to be sugar pills or something. I reach in and grab one and toss it into my mouth.

“Bradley!” she screams. The Chief comes running out of his office to see what all the fuss is about but the moment he sees that it’s just me and Colleen, he waves us off and walks back into his office. I laugh at the Chief’s dismissal. Before I know it, Colleen is pulling me off to the side, pulling me down to her height.

“That was really Viagra, you idiot!” she seethes in my ear. I laugh and shrug her off. I’m not going to panic, not until I have a problem that won’t go away.

“DUDE,” JAMES SAYS knocking on the bathroom door. “Are you okay?” I grunt, incapable of voicing exactly how not okay I am at this moment. It hurts. I’ve taken care of the issue twice but figured out after the second time that that wasn’t doing me any good. Orgasms are no fun when they keep coming back and won’t go away.

“Go away!” I yell. I’m on the floor, my pants are down around my hips and my erection is literally painfully hard. Poor Mac is so sensitive that I can’t even touch him. It may not last long but the relief is unimaginable.

“It’s been three hours!” James yells. I kick the door and wince. That action shook my torso. “You should know that Colleen just got here. She feels real bad, dude!” James will always defend his sister. I scoff.

“Your sister is a bitch!” I shout just loud enough for only James and whatever other nosey asshole is outside to hear. All the lug nut does is laugh.

“Porntop, dude, porntop.”

“Yeah, yeah,” I grumble. I’m never going to live that one down.

I scramble to cover myself up when I see the lock turn and the door open quickly. Colleen sneaks in and re-locks the door behind her. I practically growl at her. I can’t decide if I want to have my way with her until she’s as uncomfortable as I am or if I want to hogtie her and leave her for dead on the Southeast Expressway.

“I am so sorry!” Colleen whispers. Her eyes are red and she looks truly sorry. I want to believe her but Mac isn’t buying it. If he has to take a trip to the hospital, he’s going to withhold sex for a week. I’d go for longer but I’m a sucker for her big blue eyes.

“Just forgive her, dude,” James says through the door. Colleen turns around and pushes her face to the crack of the door.

“James, I’m about to try some creative techniques to take care of Brad’s problem in here, so unless you want to hear, I suggest you back up.” I laugh and then moan because even moving hurts at this point. Colleen turns back to me and I notice that she’s wearing a skirt—without panties. Half of me has had this fantasy for a long time and the other half of me is about to cry because I’m not sure Mac can take it.





CHAPTER TWENTY ONE

(Colleen)





… in an effort to be something more.





THERE HAVE BEEN many moments in my life where I thought that I could not be more embarrassed. There have been times where I have burst out into tears in public because I just can’t handle the teasing. There have been times where I have been certain that the ground is going to swallow me whole. Most of those times have involved Brad. This time is no different.

We’re due at my parents’ house in a few hours; though I’m not sure we’re going to make it. We’re both suffering from some stomach issues. And when I say some, I’m being gentle. There’s a big family get-together this afternoon, which should be fun. I haven’t seen much of my friends and family since returning home from Vegas, not that I’d seen them much before that. I was always working and just plain too busy to visit. At least that’s what I told myself. The truth is probably more like I felt like an outcast around them. I don’t anymore.