“So get out,” she said softly, “before it’s too late.”
I looked at her for a second but only shook my head. “Thanks for listening,” I said.
“Of course. Tell me about your wild life anytime. I’m a boring, married girl now.”
I laughed, and the conversation switched over to something a little more normal, like raising her children.
As the morning wore on and we talked more and more, I kept feeling so conflicted over everything. I knew Caralee had my best interests at heart. Was she right that if I waited too long, it would be too late? Maybe I really was going to be trapped with Jetter, always wanting something else but never able to put my hands on it.
And maybe this was going to fall apart anyway. If I thought about it, I’d never seen any Rebel or Demon spend any time together, except for maybe Clutch throwing guys out of the club. It had been all tension from day one, and it hadn’t broken up at all.
Maybe the Rebels and the Demons really did hate each other too much for this to ever work out. If that was the case, then I really was wasting my time. I really was sacrificing myself for absolutely nothing.
But no, I made a decision. I made a choice and I committed myself to it. My father didn’t force me into this, and all the reasons I started it still mattered.
It felt good, talking with Caralee, trying to forget my problems, but I couldn’t run from them.
I wasn’t going to run from them.
24
Clutch
We rolled up to the clubhouse an hour after the hit went down. Burke and Clinton were still back at the scene, cleaning up what they could and gathering up their boy’s body while we went back to secure the drugs and the cash.
I followed the others back into the clubhouse. Larkin headed straight back toward his office, carrying the cash, while Noble and Dow took the drugs back to the secure locker.
Ford looked at me and grinned. “Looks like our girls are chatting.”
I followed his gaze and saw Caralee sitting with Janine. Caralee looked up and smiled as Ford began to head over.
“Not my girl,” I grumbled, following him.
“Close enough,” he said.
I followed him over, annoyed. Caralee stood and kissed Ford, smiling. “You boys have fun?” she asked.
“Fun enough,” I said.
“We did okay,” Ford answered.
Janine nodded at me. “Clutch.”
I sat down next to her. “Janine.”
“Man, I can really feel the sparks flying,” Ford said, joking.
I gave him a look. “Careful,” I said.
“Relax,” he said, holding up his hands. “We all know Janine here is claimed.”
Janine gave me a little smile and took a big sip of her coffee. I waved down TomTom, who was back behind the bar, and he brought me over a bottle of whisky and some glasses.
“To the club,” I said, pouring a drink for everyone.
They all took it and drank. Ford laughed, shaking his head. “Crazy fucking morning.”
“What did you guys do?” Janine asked me.
“Club business,” I said.
She rolled her eyes.
“We all know you’ll tell us later,” Caralee said. “Why not skip to that now?”
Ford laughed. “I’m not telling you shit, woman.”
She smacked his arm. “You better, and you better not call me that again.”
He gave me a sheepish look and went silent.
I sat back and looked around the bar. It was slowly filling up with more guys, most of them Rebels. There was an undercurrent of something in the guys, murmurs and dirty looks. I frowned and realized that Burke must have told them about what had happened with Lavoy. I’d known that would happen sooner or later, but I hadn’t expected Burke to make the call while we were still riding back.
The place felt bad. I didn’t know what was going to happen, but there was an undercurrent of violence all around us. The girls chatted absently about life, mostly talking about the kids, and I gave Ford a look.
“Help me at the bar,” I said to him.
“The fuck you need help for?”
“Fucking help me, asshole.”
He shrugged and followed me as I got up. The girls watched us go but said nothing.
“You feeling it?” I asked him softly.
“Not sure,” he said, “but I think I know what you mean. The Rebels.”
“Yeah. They seem unhappy.”
“Think they heard?”
“That’d be my guess.”
“Fuck,” Ford said. “That asshole Burke.”
“Think he’s trying to stir shit up?”
“Can’t be sure. I don’t see what he’d have to gain.”
“Could be he’s making a move on the whole club.”
“We can’t be having that.”