Making His Baby(37)

“How long do you think? I mean, I know you’re not an expert or anything, but you probably know more than me.”

“At least two weeks, I think. I’ll check before then, obviously, but I won’t be holding my breath.”

He groans. “I don’t think I can wait that long.”

I reach out and take his hand, giving it a squeeze. “Well, you have no choice. Until then, all you can do is hope you’re as fertile as you claim to be.”

He chuckles at this and lifts my hand to his mouth, kissing the back of it. “I am going to miss seeing you every day. Just so you know.”

“Yeah, me too. Seeing you every day, I mean. I know why we started doing this, but I haven’t regretted it. Not for a second.”

And that’s the truth. As he continues to navigate the car to my apartment, I can feel my stomach dropping. I don’t want the week to end. I don’t want to go home. I am sure that if Blake asked me to stay longer, I would say yes instantly.

But then I remind myself that I can’t do that. I’m battling with myself constantly on two fronts. The first is the fact that I’m really starting to like Blake. When it is all said and done, I thank my lucky stars every day that he chose me for this. The more I get to know him and the closer we get, the more I can feel myself falling for him.

But that only conflicts with my other problem, and that is my revenge. I love my sister, and I owe her everything. I vowed to her and to myself to take the baby and leave Blake in the cold when the time comes. I can’t break that promise, despite how much I want to.

Because I do want to. At least, I think I do. It’s all so confusing. I look at Blake’s face as he steers the car, and I smile. I can’t help myself. He makes me so happy, and I hate what I am going to do to him.

“Here we are,” he says.

I look out the window, and indeed, the car is parked out in front of my apartment.

“Home sweet home,” I say, sighing.

I try not to sound too depressed. I don’t want Blake knowing how upset I am. I may want to stay at his place, but that doesn’t mean he wants me staying there. Odds are that he’s glad I’m leaving.

“I’ll call you soon, okay?” He says. He picks up my hand and gives it another kiss.

“Okay, I’d like that,” I respond, offering him a weak smile. I reach out and open the car door, readying myself to get out.

“Hey,” he says.

I turn back to see what he wants. He reaches forward and runs his fingers through my hair. Pulling me forward, he kisses me goodbye on the lips. I return the kiss with full force.

There is no sexual passion in the kiss. No longing or desire. It’s a kiss shared between two lovers who are aware of what they are losing.

It’s sweet and tender, and it might be the best kiss that we have ever had. But, as soon as it begins, it is over. I hold my head there for a moment, relishing the taste of his lips on mine. I then realize what I am doing, smile awkwardly at him and climb from the car.

The car pulls away, and I make my way to my apartment. As I do, I again think about what I plan on doing to him. And worse than that, I can’t decide whether or not I will be able to. If someone asks me right now and right here, I would say that I can’t hurt him like that.

I realize that I love Blake too much.





Chapter 29


BLAKE





I don’t know why I am so nervous. I really shouldn’t be. I’ve known Carrie for a few weeks now. And more than that, I’ve lived with her, slept with her and spent hours talking to her. Yet, as I sit in my car, staring at her apartment, I just can’t bring myself to walk up and knock on the front door.

The reason is that she doesn’t know I am here. I haven’t spoken to her since dropping her off on Tuesday, and rather than call, I have decided to surprise her. We’ve texted back and forth, but I’ve been busy with my latest project. But now that I am at her apartment, ready to spring my surprise visit on her, I don’t know if I should.

I haven’t been able to get her out of my head. The last three days, she has been the first thing I think of when I wake up and the last thing I think of when I go to sleep. I think of her when I eat and when I shower. I think of her on the way to work and when I am actually at work. I can’t get her out of my head.

I’ve been telling myself that it’s because I am excited about the possible baby. And in truth, that is kind of correct. There is a small chance that she might be pregnant right now, and if that is true, then it will be the best news I have ever heard.

But my inability to stop thinking about her is more than that. It’s all Carrie.

Having her stay at my house was a great idea on my part. Not only did it mean that we were able to have as much sex as possible and increase the chances of having a child, but it also meant that I was able to get to know her on a deeper level.