I can't see what I've selected, but I drop a hefty amount right on her and start spreading it around with my finger, hearing her whimper as she wiggles beneath me from the stimulation.
My finger slides in and out of her, while my thumb toys with her clit. She moans my name this time, and I bend over, ready to be surprised by which flavor I've chosen.
My lips fasten around her clit as my fingers continue to pump in and out of her, but I taste … nothing. No flavor.
I can't even really taste Harley, which is something I enjoy tasting.
She wiggles to get closer to my face as I work harder on her, trying to bring her to orgasm number one of the night.
My mouth is tingling, feeling a little sloppy, as I slowly start to realize it feels numb. Why the hell does my mouth feel numb?
"Dale, my hands … they hurt. And I can't feel what you're doing. I think my hands hurt too much," Harley whimpers, "to feel anything else."
I quickly scramble off the bed, wiping the insane amount of drool from my chin, still distracted with the fact my entire mouth feels like I just left the dentist's office.
When I flip on the lamp, my eyes go wide and my numb mouth gets forgotten, because Harley's hands are swollen and slightly purplish from where I tied her too tight.
"Ham nit," I … say …
What the hell?
"Dale, it hurts," Harley says again, breaking the momentary distraction from my thoughts.
I sprint to the kitchen when I can't undo the ridiculously tight knots, rushing by Britt and Maverick who ask what I'm doing.
"Arerey ish sied ush," I say, then mentally curse as I wipe more drool off and grab the kitchen scissors before rushing back toward the room.
"What?" Maverick and Britt ask behind me, but I don't try speaking again. What the fucking hell is wrong with me?
Harley's eyes are wide and panicked as I return-she's apparently seen her swollen hands-and I quickly manage to get the first one cut off. Then I move to the second one, cutting it as well, only it's accompanied by a squeal.
Horror washes over me when I see I've cut her arm where the binding was, and she's bleeding. Panic comes next.
"We hash to gesh to see hosishal!" I shout, which has her brow furrowing in confusion as I grab her and shove my discarded shirt over her head.
"What?" she asks, clearly not understanding my motherfucking gibberish.
And I'm still drooling. Now it feels like my chin and cheeks are as numb as my lips and tongue. In fact, ninety percent of my face is numb.
"Why does my vagina feel numb?" she asks as she rubs her wounded arm, clearly sobering.
The swelling in her hands is already going down, thank fuck. They're an angry red now instead of purple.
"Hospishal!" I tell her again, pulling her up from the bed.
My T-shirt drops to her thighs, not covering everything I want covered, so I grab a pair of boxers, directing her legs into them even as she protests.
"Are you saying hospital? What'd you to do my vagina to need a hospital?" she asks, now panicking as well.
"Arrr," I say, shoving her.
"Are you a pirate?"
"Armmm," I say, pronouncing it better this time, even though I might overdo the 'm' sound.
"What?"
Cursing, I start guiding her with a firm hand on her back, and she practically runs to keep up.
"Dale, what's going on?" she demands, but talking apparently isn't working out so well for me.
"Everything okay?" Maverick asks, eyebrows up in confusion as I hurry toward the door. I grab my keys from the table beside it and toss them to him. He catches them, not looking any less confused.
"Hoshpishal!"
He cocks his head, but follows us out.
"Why the fuck are you drooling everywhere?" he asks, but I ignore him.
I grab Harley and pull her into the back seat of my car, as Maverick takes the driver's seat. Britt watches from the door.
Maverick drives quickly, and I try to see the damage on Harley's arm. She clutches it to her, eyes still wide and panicked.
"Why are we going to the hospital," Maverick asks, but he drives like he knows it's truly an emergency.
"My vagina is numb and obviously his mouth is too. What happened?" Harley asks, turning to me.
"Tut!" I growl, pointing at her arm. Why does cut sound like tut?!
Sure I'm worried about the numb vagina and mouth, but she's bleeding, for fuck's sake. She has to realize that's a priority, right?
"Numb vagina?" Maverick asks, still not realizing she's bleeding to death back here.
"Tut!" I shout again, only it still doesn't sound like cut. "Shisors!"
I give up.
Wiping away more drool, I look up just as Maverick pulls up to the ER, and I practically carry Harley out. We're both barefoot. I'm shirtless. She's wearing my boxers and T-shirt, bleeding to death. And I'm trying my damnedest not to freak out more than I'm freaking out while drool continues to dribble down my chin.
"Can I help you?" the receptionist drawls.
"My vagina is numb," Harley tells the woman. "I think we used something that was out of date or something, because his mouth is numb too," she says.
The woman's eyebrows hit her hairline, but she doesn't react other than that.
"Tut!" I say, ignoring the drool this time as I grab Harley's massacred arm and thrust it at the woman.
"Really? You're worried about that?" Harley asks incredulously. "My vagina is numb! Like, I can't feel it at all!"
A few bursts of laughter are quickly smothered around us inside the jammed ER waiting room.
"Take a seat," the woman behind the counter says.
"See's beedin' to deaf!" I shout, pointing to her arm again.
Then I do the absolute unthinkable. I pull out my wallet, and hand the woman my license. It takes only a second for her to look over it.
"Mr. Sterling," she says. "Dale Sterling."
Not a person around who doesn't know who my father is. Right now, to keep Harley from suffering from my idiocy, I'm totally using that to my advantage.
"Have. A. Seat," the woman says coldly, shoving a clipboard at my bare chest. "And fill that out."
Okay, so I guess she doesn't know who my father is.
Cursing, I try to help Harley to a seat, but she bats my hands away, her face and neck a bright shade of red. I look at her arm, realizing it's not bleeding anywhere nearly as bad as I thought during my panic.
She reaches over and wipes drool off my chin, then wipes it on her-well, my-shirt.
"We look like we just escaped the psych ward," she grumbles quietly as we sit in the far corner. People actually hurriedly move away from us to punctuate her point. "Police should be here any minute," she adds under her breath.
Fortunately, the cabin was not far from the hospital. Unfortunately, I think I may have overreacted. Because Harley literally gets up and comes back with a small Band-Aid for her … cut. Her tiny, barely-there cut.
Before I ask if we should just go, I see four Sterlings-make that five-walk in, Britt included. Ruby is with Corbin, and Tria is with Kode. Everyone looks worried … except Maverick, who disappeared after dropping us off. I assume Rain is with Carrie, which is why she's not also here to see this really low point in my life.
Maverick is fucking grinning. Why is he grinning? What's he holding in his hand?
"You okay?" Britt asks Harley, genuinely concerned as she takes a seat by her.
"Oh, just fine. You guys should probably leave before they bring in backup to haul us off to the nearest asylum they think we escaped from."
Then Harley laughs, shaking her head. I'm not laughing.
I'm worried what a laugh would sound like or if I'd spray spit everywhere. Awesome.
"Found your vagina-numbing culprit," Maverick says. Loudly.
I'm glad everyone in the ER finds us to be entertaining tonight.
Maverick thrusts a tube at me, and I eye it, then feel myself growing a little more pissed off by the second.
Anal Ease.
Damn that shit.
It's becoming the bane of my existence.
"Quick-acting numbing agent for easy pleasure," Maverick says, reading it. "Seek medical attention if ingested orally." He practically beams at me. "You're going to have to tell a doctor that you ate Anal Ease."
"I hate chu," I say, finding the words working a little easier, the numbness fading more and more.
"Bless you," he says, as though I just fucking sneezed.
Harley laughs, doubling over. I still don't find this funny.
In fact, I'm ready to go.
I stand, still shirtless and barefoot, and head for the door.
"But you need to see a doctor, cuz!" Maverick calls out over his guffaws. "You can't eat anal numbing stuff off your girlfriend's vagina and just leave!"
I flip him off without looking back, and Harley quickly joins me, still laughing.
"Traitor," I grumble, happy to hear that word comes out perfectly, despite the still partially numb state of my mouth.
She tucks herself into my side, and I wrap my arm around her shoulders. "At least it'll be a funny story."
I glare down at her, and she grins bigger.
"One day," she amends.
I start to kiss her, now that I'm feeling less panicked and can accept the relief, but she backs away, turning her cheek while snickering.