Maid in the USA(32)

Celine sucked in her breath, her eyes wide with shock. “You don’t believe me. You do think it was my fault.”

“I’m not saying that.” Pierce was glaring back at her now. “Any one of us - you, me, Mrs. Simpson - could have left the gate open. I’m not trying to cast blame. I’m just saying even if it had been you I would not condemn you for what happened.”

Now he was changing his story. In Celine’s mind Pierce did blame her. This discussion was only confirming that she’d made the right decision. She needed to go as soon as possible.

“Pierce,” she said quietly, “I’ve made up my mind. I know you don’t trust me with Kylie anymore so it’s best for all of us if I leave. Please start looking for my replacement.”

Pierce was scowling at her now. “Is that your final word on this?”

“It’s my final word,” she said, keeping her face blank even though she felt hollow inside.

If only she didn’t have to go. She would miss Kylie so much. And Pierce. And even though he’d said she didn’t have to go, even though he said he still trusted her, it was the big question that made her want to flee. How did she know she could trust herself?

She’d left the gate open, it seemed, even though she could distinctly remember locking it. Pierce seemed to think so although he wouldn’t admit it. She’d been so sure and look what happened. How could she be sure it wouldn’t happen again?

No, for the sake of Kylie’s safety it was best if she stayed far away…no matter that her heart was breaking at the thought.

***





Sixteen days. It was sixteen days since Celine had last seen Kylie and Pierce. She’d thought things would get better with time, that the pain would eventually go away, but it had gotten worse. She was far away from Kylie and it was like being separated from her own daughter.

This summer she’d had a family, a family very different from the one in France, but a family just the same. And she missed them as she would her own flesh and blood.

She’d tried hard not to intrude in their lives but she hadn’t been able to resist calling Kylie and had done so almost every day since leaving. But calling was not the same as seeing her, holding her, smelling the cherry blossom fragrance of her hair.

Celine had made sure to call the house during the daytime when she knew Pierce would not be around. She didn’t know if her heart could take the deep timbre of his voice without breaking down in tears. She missed him too much for words. She’d been afraid that if she ever saw him she would break down and blurt out how she truly felt about him. And what would that achieve? He’d probably be speechless with embarrassment or bolt for the nearest exit.

Today, though, she didn’t care. She had to see Kylie again. She picked up the phone and dialed Pierce’s cell phone number. At the sound of his voice a tremor ran through her.

“Pierce, it’s Celine,” she said softly. “Do you have a minute?’ She would hate to know that she’d disturbed a meeting.

“Yes, go ahead.” Pierce sounded formal, clipped.

“I was wondering if you’d let me visit Kylie. I’d love to go today if that’s okay with you.” She’d said it all in a rush, wanting to get the words out before she lost the courage.

Silence. That was the response on the other end of the line. Total silence.

“Hello?” Celine said into the phone. Had he hung up on her?

“Celine.” Pierce was speaking again. Finally. “At what point did I tell you not to see Kylie?”

“Well…never,” she said, feeling stupid.

“Exactly. So why do you think you need my permission? You spoke as if you expected me to say no.” Pierce’s voice was cool. It seemed that she had offended him.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t want to impose-.”

“What time would you like to visit Celine?” He cut her off mid-sentence.

“I was thinking two o’clock in the afternoon.” She’d specifically chosen that time because she knew he would not be home.

“Fine. I’ll let them know to expect you.” And then he hung up.

He hadn’t given her a chance to say goodbye. Well, so much for him wanting to see her again. He hadn’t even asked how she was doing. It was obvious that any feelings between them were all on her end. Feeling deflated, she gently laid the receiver back in the cradle and got up to dress for her trip.

Almost two hours later Celine was pulling into the long circular driveway of the house that had been like her home for most of that summer. Her heart quickened in anticipation. She hopped out of the car, opened the back door and grabbed the huge gift bag with the Molly Dolly Set with its twenty-five fashion outfits. She knew Kylie would love dressing her up.