‘Me ma’s gone an the monsters’ll get me! Ma! Ma! Mammyee! Don’t leave me! Where are ye?’ I croaked in a whisper. I didn’t want Dickser te hear me. Then I went quiet. Very, very still. The big lump in me chest tha wanted te erupt outa me mouth was pushed down inta me belly, an I went limp. I shut meself up tight an just waited. When I’m still, nothin will happen te me. I’ll be safe. Nobody will see me.
5
Me aunt Cissy is over from England. She says she’s gettin married! She bought me a lovely pair of white kid-leather boots wit laces in them – I can smell the kid leather when I press them te me nose – an a gorgeous white linen frock. I’m te wear them fer her weddin, but she seems a bit upset wit the ma.
‘How long has this been goin on, Sally?’
‘Ah, I’m not bothered about him any more,’ me ma says.
‘Here, Martha love,’ says me aunt Cissy. ‘There’s a bun fer you. You go on outside an sit in the sunshine, an I’ll keep an eye out fer you. Now don’t go too far, I’ll be watchin ye from the winda.’
I wanted te be very good fer me aunt Cissy, so I didn’t gallop across the road, cos me ma says I’ll get kilt doin tha, even though I think ye’ll get kilt if ye don’t run. Anyway, I sit meself down an stretch me legs out te get comfortable, an Cissy is sittin on the windasill, watchin me an drinkin a cup a tea.
I look te examine me bun. Wha’s these black things in it? I take a bite an spit it out. Yuk! I can’t eat tha!
‘Ah, eat yer bun, it’s good fer ye!’ Cissy shouts across. ‘Them currants will clean ye out!’
I put the bun behind me back an started te pull the currants out, watchin her at the same time. I couldn’t move, cos I had a pile of currants behind me.
Suddenly, there’s great excitement when a horse an cab comes aroun the corner carryin me aunt Biddy an me aunt Nelly an me cousin Barney. The women are roarin an laughin at somethin the jarvey said te them.
‘Whoa there, Jinny! Easy girl. Now, ladies, who’s first?’
‘She is.’ Biddy points te Nelly, laughin. ‘She’s the desperate one. I’m already landed wit me own fella back in England.’
‘Ah, no. I’m very particular,’ Nelly says. ‘Ye’d have te have plenty a money te get me.’
‘Right, girls! Hop down, an I’ll give ye’s a hand up wit the suitcases.’
I ran across the road, an Biddy swooped me up.
‘Lookit you, ye got very big since I saw ye last.’
‘Yeah, Auntie Biddy! I’m four now, so I am.’
I looked at me cousin, an he was wearin eyeglasses.
‘Look! Lookit, Martha,’ Barney said, an he showed me a load a money. ‘Come on, I’ll buy ye somethin,’ an we bought ice-cream cornets, an broken biscuits wrapped in paper, an bull’s eye sweets.
They opened up the back room, an me an me ma slept in there. Tha night me an me cousin Barney took it in turns te vomit up our guts inta the bucket. Our mas laughed an said it was all the sweets we’d eaten, an tomorrow they’d get us a wormin powder te clean us out.
We went te the park beside St Audoen’s Church an sat in the grass. Me ma an Dickser made plans te go te England.
‘I’m savin every penny I can get me hands on,’ me ma said.
‘How much have ye now?’ Dickser asked, an me ma told him.
‘That’ll do,’ he said. He seemed very happy an even grinned at me, but I turned me head. I didn’t want anythin te do wit him.
They arranged te meet tha night, an the ma would give him her money. She was all excited on the way home. ‘We’re goin te England, Martha! An Dickser’s goin te find us a place te live. We’ll be grand!’ I was delighted te see her so happy an forgot about Dickser.
When we got home, the aunts were waitin.
‘Where were you?’ asked Biddy.
‘Out!’ me ma said.
‘Look at the condition you’re in, ye should be ashamed of yourself. You’re seein tha Dickser fella, aren’t ye?’
‘No, I’m not.’
‘Ye are! I’m tellin ye’s all. She should be put away. Ye’re bringin shame on this family an destroyin our good name!’
Cissy came over te me an asked me gently, ‘Is she seein Dickser?’
Biddy joined in an shouted, ‘Look! Here’s a penny, tell us the truth, an we’ll give you this.’ An Nelly waved a half-crown in me face.
The ma shouted, ‘No! Don’t tell them anythin, Martha,’ an they were all shoutin at once. Me eyes swivelled from the penny te the half-crown an back again. I wanted the money.
‘Yeah, she is,’ I said, an reached out fer the money.