Working on the garden with him, she did as she was asked, being careful with her hands and not overworking them as the day went on. Sometimes she found herself just sitting there, taking in the beauty of it all. Something about the garden just fit so well around her. It brought a feeling in her that was indescribable, one she hadn't truly felt before. It was like she felt at … home. She shouldn't, though. It should feel like a prison, but it didn't. And if it was, then it was the most beautiful prison she had ever seen.
In her world, places like this didn't exist, but here, for some reason it did. I did it for you.
Chloe's eyes drifted over to a sweaty Lucca, who was now putting the tools away. What do you want from me? Nothing. She had nothing to offer him. What he wanted or expected from her, she didn't know, but she did know that he was going to be let down when he found out she had nothing to offer. Chloe just hoped he would let her go in one piece when he found out.
After Lucca put all the supplies away, he sat down beside her to see his hard work come to fruition.
"What do you think, darlin'?"
"It's beautiful," she whispered.
"It'll be prettier in the spring when the flowers come back."
It didn't matter to her. She loved the way it looked in all stages. She only wished she could have seen it before his mother had died.
"C-Can I ask you a question?"
He turned toward her. "I told you, you can ask me anything, Chloe."
"What did it look like when your … ?" She trailed off, unable to get the question out, afraid it might upset him.
"When my mother took care of it?"
She nodded.
Lucca's eyes scanned over the expanse of the huge yard. "It just looked fuller, healthier, and even seemed brighter. The majority of the flowers died off with her. I've gotten some of them to grow back, but others, I'm still trying."
She didn't doubt that one day he would get it to return to what it once was, if not better. The changes she had noticed since the first time she had seen it were drastic.
She loved hearing about his mother. It made him seem more … human. Looking over at him, she only wanted to hear more, hoping it would help her understand why he was the way he was.
"Will you tell me what she was like?"
"Her name was Melissa, and she had blond hair like Maria, and the greenest eyes like Nero. She was the sweetest, kindest person you could ever meet, and everyone loved her. Being home with her children and the garden was all she ever wanted or needed." His eyes turned darker and his voice became somber. "None of us deserved her, not my father, and especially not me. For her being so sweet, I can't imagine how it felt for her first child to come out a monster." He briefly paused before continuing, "But not once did she love me any less, not even when she saw me at my worst."
Chloe quietly sat there next to him, not knowing what to say to a man who thought of himself as a monster. And there weren't words to say, nor comfort she could give to help with the loss of his mother. She could tell that he had loved her, but she wasn't even sure if he knew it deep down, because he only thought of himself as without feelings.
They sat there peacefully for a while, neither one wanting to ruin what was there before them or between them. She wasn't sure how much time had passed before he spoke.
"I'm going to get cleaned up then start us some dinner. Take your time."
He was leaving her now, but she needed to tell him something before he did.
"Lucca … ?"
He stopped, looking down at her to where she sat in the grass.
It was hard to look away from the ocean of flowers that swayed in the wind, reminding her of waves, to Lucca, but she wanted him to see that she meant every word.
"If she were still here, I think she would be happy with what you've done. She would love it out here, just as much as I do."
It was obvious how much he wanted to reach out and touch her in that moment, but he didn't, content enough with the words she had given him.
"I think so, too, darlin'."
Chloe continued to sit there, watching him walk away. With each step he took away from her, she couldn't help feeling the less beautiful the garden became now.
Twenty-Five
Everything Came at a Price
When the plate of meatballs and spaghetti were set down in front of her, she couldn't help smiling.
Lucca noticed as he sat down beside her with his own plate. "Is this okay?"
"Yes." That was the thing. Every day he would make her dinner, and every time it was a meal she liked. However, not once had he asked her what she liked or didn't. He always strangely knew. "Spaghetti and meatballs is actually one of my favorites."
He looked pleased. "Well, good. I hope you like it."
Picking up her utensils, she took a bite of the spaghetti, knowing it was going to be good, but not as good as it tasted the second it was in her mouth. She should have known based on the sole fact that he was Italian.
"It's the best I've ever had."
"Thank you, darlin'." Cutting into a meatball, he asked, "What's your favorite meal?"
Hmm. She had to think about it for a moment. It was a hard question when you had delicious food in front of you and you weren't a picky eater to begin with. "That's hard, but I think my favorite meal would have to be chili."
He didn't seem to believe it as he made a dubious face. "Chili?"
She made her own incredulous face back at him. "What's wrong with chili?"
"I've just never heard of anyone saying their favorite food is chili. I don't think I've ever even had a good enough chili for me to like it."
Thinking about it, she never heard of anyone liking it that much, either. It seemed to be one of those things you could live without, unlike pizza or fries.
"Well, when it's the right chili, it's one of the best meals you can have."
"What do you like about it?" he asked curiously.
"I don't know really." She went deep in thought, trying to figure it out before it hit her. "It just makes me feel warm and at home, I guess … And happy. I feel happy when I eat it. Is that weird?"
Looking at her with green eyes, he shook his head. "No, darlin'."
"I think I just like it so much because it was the only thing my mom was good at cooking." Her mother had stolen the recipe from her sister, which was the only reason it tasted good in the first place.
"I've never made it before, but I'll see if I can make it for you."
"That's okay. I don't wa-"
"No, I want to. I can't promise that it will be any good, but I want to try for you."
"Okay. T-Thank you." She smiled, going back to her food.
The rest of the meal was enjoyed in silence. It was too good to continue talking. It really was the best spaghetti she had ever eaten, even up until the last bite.
Not until the last bite was taken and Lucca got up did she realize what was next.
She nervously got up, picking up her plate. "I-I can take these to the sink and d-do the dishes for you."
"That's okay, darlin'. I don't want you to get your clean bandages dirty."
When the plate slipped away into his grasp, she felt her hope of not having to sit beside him go along with it. She had gotten used to sitting so close to him on the floor every evening, but this was going to be the first time since finding out what he did for a living. She could also feel this time was going to be different because he was starting to touch her now.
Lucca placed the dishes in the sink and went into the living room, taking his seat in the big leather chair and placing the pillow down for her beside his feet.
She hadn't moved an inch.
"Come here, Chloe," he commanded, sensing her nerves.
Her body moved like it always did at his demands, not stopping until it fulfilled what he wanted by sitting down on the pillow beside him. She sat stiffly with his widespread leg closer than usual.
"You've been fine around me all day, darlin'; why are you so nervous now?"
He's right, she told herself in shock. She had been nervous around him when she had first come downstairs, but when she had gone outside to the garden with him, she had been fine. Maybe it was the calmness of being outside, or even the calmness of him today. However, the moment it was time to sit here with him, it had all changed.
Holding her hands together, she wished she could squeeze them. "B-Because I know you've been waiting all day for this."
As Lucca reached down and picked up a strand of her hair, she felt his cold fingertips ever so lightly brush her neck, making her question if it really happened or not.
"How did you know?" he asked darkly, beginning to twirl her hair.
"I can just feel it." In my bones.
"Do you know why I like sitting here with you like this every night?"
She shook her head, unsure if she really wanted to hear the answer.
"It relaxes me. Calms me … " He paused, wrapping the hair tighter around his finger. "And it stills the darkness."
"The darkness … ?" she whispered, feeling breathless.
"The part in me that whispers for me to do very dark things."
Turning, she looked back at the chilling man. "The part that makes you the underboss?"