"Why should sex be any different? It's just something you do with your body."
Blay seemed nonplussed. "But… what about privacy?"
"Privacy is a matter of context." Qhuinn got out a third beer. "And, Blay?"
"What?"
"I'm really good at sex, too." He cracked the top and took a pull. "So here's what we need to do. I'm going to take a couple days to get strong, and then we're going out to the clubs downtown. I want to do it again, but it can't be with her." Qhuinn looked over at John. "J-man, you're coming with us to ZeroSum. I don't care if you're a pretrans. We go together."
Blay nodded. "The three of us are a good vibe. Besides, John, you're going to be where we are soon."
As the two started making plans, John got quiet. The whole picking-up-chicks thing was unfathomable, and not just because the transition had yet to hit him. He had a bad history with things of a sexual nature. The worst.
For a split second, he had a vivid memory of the dirty stairwell it had happened in. He felt the gun at his temple. Felt his jeans being yanked down. Felt the unthinkable as it was done to him. He remembered his breath scratching up and down his throat and his eyes watering and how, when he'd pissed himself, it had gotten on the tips of the guy's cheap sneakers.
"This weekend," Qhuinn announced, "we are going to get you taken care of, Blay."#p#分页标题#e#
John put his beer down and rubbed his face as Blay's cheeks got red.
"Yeah, Qhuinn… I don't know—"
"Trust me. I'm going to make it happen for you. Then, John? You're next."
John's first response was to shake his head no, but he stopped himself so he didn't look like an idiot. He was already feeling behind the eight ball, all small and unmanly. Turning down an offer to get laid would put him solidly in Loserland.
"So we got a plan?" Qhuinn demanded.
As Blay fiddled with the bottom of his T-shirt, John got the distinct impression the guy was going to say no. Which made John feel so much better—
"Yeah." Blay cleared his throat. "I… ah, yeah. I'm, like, juiced as shit. It's almost all I can think about, you know? And it's, like, painful, for real."
"I know exactly what you mean." Qhuinn's mismatched eyes sparkled. "And we are going to have us some good times. Shit, John… will you tell your body to get its groove on?"
John just shrugged, wishing he could leave.
"So, time for some 'sKillerz'?" Blay asked, nodding to the Xbox on the floor. "John's going to beat us again, but we can still fight for number two."
It was a royal relief to get focused on something else, and the three of them got wound up by the game, yelling at the TV, throwing candy wrappers and beer caps at one another. God, John loved this. On the video screen they competed as equals. He was not small and left behind; he was better than they were. In sKillerz, he could be the warrior he wanted to be.
As he tanned their hides, he looked over at Blay and knew the guy had picked this game specifically to make John feel better. But then, Blay tended to know where people were in their heads, and how to be kind without embarrassing someone. He was an excellent friend.
Four six-packs, three trips to the kitchen, two full games of sKillerz, and a Godzilla movie later, John checked his watch and got off the bed. Fritz would be coming for him soon, because he had an appointment at four a.m. every night that he had to make or he was kicked out of the training program.
See you tomorrow in class? he signed.
"Good deal," Blay said.
Qhuinn smiled. "IM later, k'ay?"
Will do. He paused at the door. Oh, hey, meant to ask.
He tapped his eye and pointed to Qhuinn. What's up with the shiner?
Qhuinn's stare stayed absolutely steady, his smile bright as ever. "Oh, it's nothing. Just slipped and fell in the shower. Really stupid, huh."
John frowned and glanced at Blay, whose eyes hit the floor and stayed there. Okay, something was—
"John," Qhuinn said firmly, "accidents happen."
John didn't believe the kid, especially given that Blay's peepers were still down for the count, but as someone who had his own secret he wasn't into the prying thing.
Yeah, sure, he signed. Then he whistled a quick goodbye and took off.
As he closed the door, he heard their deep voices and put his hand on the wood. He wanted to be where they were so badly, but the sex stuff… No, his transition was about becoming male so he could avenge his dead. It was not about banging chicks. Matter of fact, maybe he should take a page from Phury's book.
Celibacy had plenty of things to recommend it. Phury had been abstaining for, like, ever, and look at him. He was totally tight in the head, a real together kind of guy.