Lover At Last(187)

Like if Blay pulled away right now? He would shatter into pieces that would never fit together right again.

Blay let out a snuffle and jerked his arm, pulling Qhuinn closer, not pushing him off. “You cold? You’re shaking.”

“Warm me?”

There was some shuffling, and then a blanket was thrown over them both. Then the lights went off.

As Blay took a deep breath and seemed content to settle in for the duration, Qhuinn closed his eyes…and dared to thread his fingers through his best friend’s, forming a seal of their hands.

“You okay?” Blay asked in a muffled way. Like there was nothing but a pilot light left on in his brain—but he did care.

“Yeah. Just cold.”

Qhuinn opened his lids against the darkness. The only thing he could see was the line of light that came under the door at floor level.

As Blay drifted off, that breathing becoming ever more slower and even, Qhuinn stared ahead, even though he couldn’t see anything in front of him.

Courage.

He thought he’d had all he needed—that the way he’d grown up had made him tougher and stronger than anyone else. That the way he did his job, running into burning buildings or jumping into the captain’s seats of busted-up aircraft, proved it. That how he lived his life, essentially apart, meant he was strong. Meant he was safe.

The true measure of courage was still waiting for him, however.

After way too many years, he’d finally told Blay he was sorry. And then after way too much drama, he’d finally told the guy he was grateful.

But coming forward and being real about the fact that he was in love? Even if Blay was with someone else?

That was the true divide.

And goddamn him, he was going to do it.

Not to break the pair of them up—no, that wasn’t it. And not to burden Blay.

In this case, payback, as it turned out, was actually a pledge. Something that was made with no expectations and no reservations. It was the jump without a parachute, the leap without knowing, the trip and the fall without anything to catch you.

Blay had done that not once, but several times—and yeah, sure, Qhuinn wanted to go back to any of those moments of vunerability and beat his earlier incarnations so badly that his head cleared, and he recognized the opportunity he’d been given.

Unfortunately, shit didn’t run that way.

It was time for him to repay the strength…and in all likelihood, bear the pain that was going to come when he was turned down in a far more kindly manner than he’d provided for.

Forcing his lids down, he brought Blay’s knuckles to his mouth, brushing a kiss against them. Then he gave himself up to sleep, letting himself fall into unconsciousness, knowing that, at least for the next few hours, he was safe in the arms of his one and only.





SIXTY-EIGHT


The following evening, as night fell, Assail sat naked at his desk, his eyes tracing the computer screen in front of him. The monitor’s imaging was split into four quadrants that were marked north, south, east, and west, and from time to time, he manipulated the cameras, changing their focus and direction. Or mayhap he moved to other lenses around the house. Or went back to the ones he had been watching.

Having taken a shower and shaved hours ago, he knew he had to get dressed and go out. That lesser with the hearty appetite for product was up in arms, claiming he’d been cheated of a supply of cocaine. Except the twins had completed that particular transaction according to the slayer’s wishes —and they had it videotaped.

Just a little precaution Assail had initiated.

So he didn’t know what it was all about, but he was certainly going to find out: He had sent the recording to the lesser’s phone about an hour ago, and was awaiting a response.

Mayhap it was going to involve another face-to-face meeting.

And his disgruntled buyer was not the only thing hanging over him. It was getting to be that time of month when Benloise and he needed to do their own squaring up—a complicated transfer of funds that made everyone edgy, including Assail: Even though he did regular weekly payments, they totaled but a quarter of his actual purchases, and on the thirtieth, he was going to have settle the balance sheet up.

Lot of cash. And people could make very poor decisions when there was that much money in play.

There was also the issue that, for the first time, he was going to want the twins to accompany him. He didn’t imagine Benloise was going to appreciate the added company, but it was appropriate for his two associates to be brought further into the fold—and this payment was going to be the largest he’d ever made.

A record sure to be broken if he and that lesser continued to do business together.

Assail shifted the mouse. Clicked on one of the quadrants. Panned the security camera around, searching the backwoods behind his house.