He closed his eyes and dropped his head for a second before bringing it back and leveling his blue eyes onto hers. “Annie, it wasn’t a lie. I was a quiet kid growin’ up, known as Stoney in the neighborhood. I needed a name when I went under, but I wanted to hold on to something that was real. I went with Stoney. So baby, when you got Stoney, you were still getting me.
“I know you’re in pain and I didn’t want to do this here, but you wouldn’t give me a chance yesterday, so I’m takin’ my chance now. Can’t give you too many details, but you’re gonna let me tell you how it is.
“I’ve been workin’ vice for several years, gettin’ more and more frustrated, ‘cause no matter how many dealers we would get, we couldn’t get the top. Two and a half years ago, a good friend’s woman was kidnapped and hurt by these fuckers. We got her out, but I saw what that did. Fuckin’ almost lost his woman and thought for sure we were gonna fuckin’ lose him too.”
Annie lay quiet, listening to his story, unable to look away. Unable to turn it off. Unable to shut it down. Oh my God. He’s witnessed this and been hurt by it. Softly she asked, “Was the woman all right?”
He looked down at her face that had gentled, seeing her brow wrinkle in concern. Placing his hand on her cheek, he smoothed his fingers over her brow, willing her to relax. “Yeah, baby. She was fine. Drugged and hurt, but she came out all right, with a good man by her side to make sure she would stay all right.
“I decided then that a big play needed to be made. I thought that goin’ undercover would work for me. So I volunteered.”
“Your eyes,” she whispered.
“Yeah. I been wearing dark contacts ‘cause my eyes give me away.”
“I didn’t like the dark eyes. They didn’t tell me anything when I looked at you.”
Shane smiled, relieved that Annie was talking, giving him a chance.
“So I went in. Two years, baby. No contact with family.” At this, her eyes widened, but he continued. “My family knew. They get it, ‘cause this job is who I am. But it sucked all the same. I thought maybe six months, but it fuckin’ kept draggin’ out. And livin’ in that world for two years was fuckin’ killin’ me.”
The room was quiet for a moment until Leon spoke. “So what about doc? Where did she fit into your world?”
Annie’s eyes shifted to Leon and Suzanne in the corner, having forgotten they were still there. Suzanne was no longer sniffling, but eyes wide, attentively listening.
Shane glanced to the corner also, taking in the two friends. Rubbing his hand over his face, he continued. “Been watchin’ them torture dogs to get the shit in and around the country. Finally got a tip that a vet in the area was helpin’ them. Didn’t know how. Findin’ easier ways for the dogs to ingest the drug packets. Started watchin’ some of the vets. I ended up with you,” he said as he leaned back over the bed, placing his fists on either side of her.
“Annie baby, you were the first ray of sunshine I had in almost two years. It wasn’t hard followin’ you, watchin’ you. I’d been buried deep in the belly of the beast. Forgot what clean livin’ looked like. Smelled like. Felt like. But you, you lived that clean every fuckin’ day. I had the urge to make contact just so I could have a little of that clean back. It didn’t take long to figure out you weren’t the vet we were lookin’ for. But baby, couldn’t give you up.”
“What do you mean?” she asked, peering into his sky blue eyes, looking for understanding.
“I kept followin’ you. Just to see you. Just to have that sunshine, even from a distance. Not too close. Not enough to get burned. But just enough to feel the warmth.”
The room was silent. No one spoke. No one moved. The only sounds came from the heart monitor that Annie could swear was beating faster.
“We were gettin’ close to havin’ the evidence we needed, when one of the fuckers decided to test some of us by havin’ us use our own personal dogs. I’d rescued one not long after takin’ this assignment. It fuckin’ killed me to have them get Sarge to swallow that shit, but I knew that would give us the evidence.”
Shaking his head at the memory, he continued, “So I let them do that, but only ‘cause I knew I could get him out and get him to you. I wasn’t testin’ you. I wasn’t settin’ you up. I already knew you were clean. Annie baby, I came to you ‘cause I knew you would save his life. Without thinkin’. Without askin’ for the moon. Without throwin’ a shitfit ‘cause it was late and I might not have money. I came to you ‘cause I knew you were the only one I wanted to trust with my dog.”