Both boys nodded.
“It’s a man’s job to protect and defend his own,” Jake continued. “I think both of you know what happened to Evie back in Oklahoma—or you at least have a pretty good idea. Lloyd and I killed a lot of men that day, but it had to be done. I just don’t want either one of you to worry I’ll go back to prison, because I haven’t done anything wrong, and I won’t do anything wrong if I can help it. But I’ll damn well use my guns to protect my wife and my children and grandchildren if I have to. And it’s because these guns I wear have brought me a lot of trouble and heartache that it’s hard for me to teach you to wear guns. It’s hard for Lloyd, too. Can you understand it’s because we love you and don’t want you to get hurt or in trouble?”
The boys nodded, and Stephen suddenly threw his arms around Jake’s neck. “Don’t do something that makes you have to go away, Grampa.”
Jake struggled against his tears. “I’ll try real hard not to let that happen,” he promised.
“I heard one of the men say that Mike Holt wants to kill Pa. Is it true?”
Jake reached out to grasp Ben’s hand while he clung to Stephen. “Yes, it’s true. But, Stephen, your father is just as good at handling men like that as I am, so don’t you worry about it, okay? Is that why you and Ben want to carry your own guns?”
“Yeah,” Ben answered for Stephen. “What if you and Lloyd need protecting? He’s my brother now.”
Jake squeezed his hand. “Boys, I assure you that Lloyd and I can handle ourselves just fine—and we’ve got plenty of hired hands, all good men. This is the J&L, and nobody is going to get onto this land without us knowing it. Nobody will get near any of us. And even when we leave the ranch and take the cattle to Denver, we’ll be on the lookout. Lloyd and I rode together for three years as U.S. Marshals. We know what we’re doing. Promise me you’ll stop worrying.”
Stephen sniffed and pulled away, wiping at his eyes. “Will you still teach us someday about how to use handguns?”
“Sure I will, but not till you’re at least fifteen or sixteen, understand? And in your case, Stephen, only if your father agrees.”
“He likes you now, doesn’t he?”
“Likes me?”
“I mean, he’s not mad at you anymore about when you went to prison? You said Pa was real mad at you.”
Jake smiled sadly. “Your father and I have never been closer, Stephen. We still have our differences, but I’d die for Lloyd, and he damn well knows it. And I think he’d do the same for me. I hope you and Lloyd will always be as close as he and I are. I might have had a father from hell, but one thing I learned from the man was the kind of father I wanted to be. It took me a long time to learn how to do that, but your grandmother taught me things about love I didn’t understand when I first met her. And let me tell you something—both of you—no better woman ever walked the face of the earth than Miranda Harkner. Because of me, she’s had a hard life, but she stuck through it and never complains and has shown me what love really means. I pray both of you find a woman like that someday.”
Ben made a face. “We don’t want nothing to do with girls.”
Jake grinned. “Believe me, when you are older, you will change your mind, Son.”
Stephen frowned. “Eddie Holmes told me his pa said you used to run around with bad ladies. Did you?”
“Bad ladies?” Jake couldn’t help laughing. “That was before I met your grandmother, and that is a whole different subject, boys. Stephen, that’s for your father to tell you about. But you shouldn’t really call them that. They aren’t bad. Most of them are good at heart.” He sobered. “Women like that half raised me, and sometimes they shielded me from my father when he was having one of his drunken rages. One even took a beating to protect me. Many women like that have a lot of good in them, and most have had their own tragic past.” He tousled Ben’s hair. “You boys listen to me. When you get older, you respect all women. All women, understand? Don’t you ever think of a woman as bad, and don’t ever, ever lay a hand wrongly on a woman. That’s one thing I will never tolerate. If I ever learn you’ve abused a woman when you get older, I’ll toss you right off the J&L and disinherit you. Understand?”
“Yes, sir,” Ben answered.
“You don’t go with other ladies now, do you, Grampa?”
Jake tried to keep the moment serious, but it was next to impossible. He chuckled. “Stephen, if I did, I would have to answer to your grandmother for it, and believe me, I’m more afraid of her than I am of those seven rustlers I went up against a few weeks ago.”