She returned the kiss, crying at the same time. She hugged his neck. “Make love to me. I want to know it’s my Jake making love to me in that nice way you have.”
“Randy, you have to be sure,” he said gently, kissing the bruises at her throat again. “I don’t want to wake up bad memories.”
“Not with you,” she moaned. “It would never be that way with you.”
“But you’re so bruised and sore.”
“Take me back, Jake.”
It was the first time in his life he’d been afraid to make love to a woman, and she was his own wife. “Are you really sure?”
“You’re my Jake. I’m really sure.”
He tasted her mouth again, gently licking her. He moved a hand down to places that belonged only to him, gauging her reaction when he ran a finger inside of her, wanting to be sure she was ready for this. Slowly and carefully, he used only a little foreplay to be sure she was ready and that nothing would hurt. He watched her eyes as she met his gaze lovingly and with desire. She leaned up and grasped his face in her hands, kissing him almost wantonly. He kept up his touches until he felt the moistness that meant she really did want this. Suddenly, she started crying again. She reached down and grasped that part of him that she considered only hers. “Jake, if you want—”
“No. Never.”
“You’re a beautiful man. I would do anything—”
“No. You wouldn’t, and you won’t. It’s all right, Randy.”
“Maybe you need that to feel like you’re the only one…”
“I don’t need that.” He kissed her desperately as he moved inside her, forcing himself to be gentle but wanting to ram hard, wanting to claim her fast and deep but afraid of hurting her. She was so small, so thin, so perfect, so wounded. How sweet of her to offer the one thing that would bring back her awful ordeal. He would not do that to her.
He fought his own weaknesses, wanting to weep himself, wanting to cling to her because he’d almost lost her, wanting to tell her he’d go crazy without her. But he had to stay strong. She needed him to be strong.
He buried himself deep, gently grasping her bottom. And there it was—not just the exquisite pleasure, but the sharing of souls, the joy of becoming one body in a way that nothing and no one could ever change. Her heart beat in his chest and his beat in hers. Thirty years. Thirty years, and it was just as good as ever, and he needed no more than this—to be inside this woman and spill his life into her—to claim every inch of her and feel her breath against his lips, feel her heart beating against his own—this little slip of a woman who’d hid his guns and dared him to beat out of her where they were.
She knew he wouldn’t. She knew it.
“Tell me you love me,” she whispered.
“Yo te amo, mi querida.”
“Don’t let go of me.”
“I’m right here. Lo nuestro será eterno…esta tierra es eterna…tu y yo estaremos unidos eternamente.”
Randy recognized the words “always” and “forever.”
“Who do you belong to?” he asked again.
She closed her eyes, and Jake was surprised she was finally able to climax. “Jake Harkner,” she gasped.
“You bet.” Jake continued slow, rhythmic thrusts. “And I’m taking back every inch of you.”
She cried out his name, again begging him never to let go of her. Jake couldn’t help his own release, and after the tension of the last few days, he felt completely spent as he relaxed beside her. He kept her in his arms, and she nestled into his shoulder as he pulled the blankets over them.
“You won’t ever take that job, will you?”
“I told you I wouldn’t. Have I ever lied to you, or broken a promise?”
“No.”
“I’m not doing one thing that means being away from you for days at a time, Randy. I already told you that.”
“Did you kill some of those men?”
“Yes.”
“But they were shooting back, right? They took me, and you had a right to go after them.”
“That’s right.”
“Jake, I…I killed Brad Buckley, didn’t I?”
He kissed her hair. “Yes. But you had every right. The state you were in, no one could ever blame you for that.”
“I did it for you. I was scared the law would come and take you away.”
“Randy, I would have had the right to kill him. You didn’t need to do that.”
“I was scared for you. Are you sure you aren’t in trouble?”
“I’m not in trouble, and no one will know. Buckley had no family left, and I doubt anyone will ever miss the drifters with him. No one who was there will ever talk. The men buried their bodies, and I told them I never want to know where. They stayed behind to burn down that cabin, and that will be the end of it. As far as I’m concerned, it never happened.” He kissed her gently, over and over. “I just want you to be able to live with this and be my Randy again.”