Love and History
Chapter One
Even when you wanted men to dominate you, they ruined everything!
Bridget Stanger slammed her apartment door and locked it behind her. Chain, deadbolt and doorknob were all secure. After three weeks of chatting online with a potential boyfriend who was a Dom, she’d caught him in a lie on their first time out.
Every time! She stalked to her bedroom and kicked off her pumps. Shrugging out of the casual green dress that showed her form but not too much for the dinner date, she cursed him under her breath. He was just another one who’d thought he could work her up to what he wanted.
The dungeons are only social, right! She wasn’t a virgin or new sub. At thirty-two, she knew what she wanted and had been very clear about her limits before they’d met. No reason to waste their time.
Some men were players, even in the BDSM community. Unfortunately, in the small New England college town where she taught, there wasn’t a huge pool of Doms from which to choose.
She carefully removed her nice lingerie and thigh-high stockings and put them away. Her fury wouldn’t cause her to snag the stuff she loved wearing!
Tugging on a terrycloth robe against the winter chill, she headed to her small desk nestled in her living room. Opening her laptop, she used an email address no one would match up with her and created a blog.
“I’m done! No more wasting time,” she said aloud to no one. Up for tenure this year, she had a paper to finish up for publication. The right Dom would encourage her and help her, but the wrong ones only infuriated her. Maybe there wasn’t someone for her. Maybe all the good ones were taken, and new Doms believed they could make the sub do anything. Amateurs!
Her fingers flew across the keys. It wasn’t the great English Literature she taught, but damn it, she was right. The title spoke for itself, but she reread every word. There was nothing worse than an English teacher with typos or bad grammar. Even though no one would ever know this blog came from her she wanted it to be insightful.
Masters Wanted!
Open post from an experienced submissive to the Doms of New England!
Are there no bedroom Doms left in the world? I don’t want the extremes. I don’t need to belong to a club. All I need is one man who has the patience, intelligence and creativity to make me his. Perhaps this is a single girl rant, but having found my niche sexually, it should be easier to link up with sexual Doms.
However, all I seem to get are those who want to test or exceed my hard limits. I don’t play or give in on those things. I safe word out and break off things immediately. There is no second chance with me. Only one Dom has ever caused me a small physical injury. I’m not a doormat. Maybe I’m just a bitchy sub? It no longer matters because I’m now mourning the life I envisioned as part of a Dom/sub couple. Equal in every way except sexually. My partner may not exist.
So I will share my thoughts here for those who might be interested. Some subs may benefit from my experience. The publicity of our subculture, thanks to books and internet sharing and other online outlets, could be a good thing. Finding others discreetly or finding a place to meet others in safety is a huge benefit for a newbie. That doesn’t mean one needs to belong to a dungeon or have orgy parties in their basement to be in the lifestyle. There are subs, like myself, who don’t want to be shared, paraded or caged. It’s perfectly acceptable and no more or less gratifying to be private about your Dom/sub play.
For the Masters, that title is an honor. A privilege earned by those who understand the experience and have the skills to lead the play properly. The limits are not yours to make, but yours to respect. Pushing a sub doesn’t mean breaking her hard lines under the lie of a lesson or punishment. That is a brutal break of trust! Please do not represent yourself as okay with certain limits and then demand to cross them. It makes us all look like sex crazed maniacs.
A true Master doesn’t need an audience or even a single prop to drive his sub to beg for more. He needs only words and will. Of course, I’m not speaking to the 24/7 lifers who take things to their own level. I can’t even comprehend that. Nor am I referring to the plenty of men who’d love to order women around generally. That isn’t being a sexual Dom. But maybe those men have invaded our ranks as society becomes more equal elsewhere?
Bedroom Doms, please don’t feel the need to show off in a dungeon or attempt any extreme play without a genuine desire on both sides. There are plenty of eager subs who want the intimacy of private play as much as you do!
The post wasn’t laid out as clearly as the thoughts in her head, but it made her point. She posted it then sent the link to her BDSM fetish group online. The support and friendships were wonderful, but she didn’t need to attend a house party or visit a club on kink night. She’d met people through the group and knew others shared her frustration!