Love Scars: Bad Boy's Bride(38)
SAVAGE KIND OF LOVE
WICKED KIND OF LOVE
SEXY SAMPLES: MERCILESS LOVE
I: Deeper Sins
All your avarice will lead you back to the same place. Heaven and hell are hungry worlds, my children. Don't be surprised if they swallow you whole, 'til you find they're just one great yawning pit.
Pain devours, but so does pleasure.
The Prophet's latest sermon echoed in my head. Thinking about his sluggish, rambling speech was all I could do to keep my eyes off my father while we drove.
He spun the wheel sharply, a small twist away from throwing us off the narrow forest road and head-on into a large tree. I slipped up when the truck jerked.
The little murmur of surprise and fear on my lips was all it took him to turn to me.
“Stupid, sinful girl. Why can't you be more like your sister?” I watched his wrinkled hands flex as he gripped the steering wheel, a grip so tight his bony knuckles bulged at his skin. “She trusts in her Lord, the Prophet, and her father. You don't.”
“Heather isn't perfect either, Daddy, and you know it.”
“Stop!” he hissed. “Swallow your fucking lies. I have only myself to blame. I was a fool for thinking I could take you to prayer without causing a damned scandal. Every day I'm reminded God took Charlene, and left me an unruly daughter in her place. I'm cursed.”
His speech was slow, erratic. He must've had at least a whole bottle of wine to himself at the sermon, as usual.
Whatever. I just kept watching the road through the cloudy windshield, trying not to spit fear every time he rocked the truck outside the faded line down the road. In good weather, our settlement was only twenty minutes away.
Today, it was absolutely pouring, spitting whole rivers on us, even through the towering trees reaching to the heavens. In this remote pocket of northern California, the vegetation shared its rule with the rain. It was a cold rain too. I longed for warmth.
Big mistake. Thinking about being warm reminded me of Ryan. He was so big, so hard, so amazingly warm when I grabbed him during the heavenly embrace.
It was just like any other sermon. The Prophet had whipped himself up, and he was yelling gibberish. Then he hitched and fell, shaking and rolling off the pulpit. It was the congregation's signal to hug our neighbor and dance with him, basking in the Lord's all cleansing light.
Forgiveness. Purity.
They were supposed to come naturally. I was supposed to be the good girl, lost in heavenly thoughts rather than earthly desires.
Well, the heavens had given me bad luck today. We'd sat next to the most eligible young man in the commune, and Daddy turned to embrace Miss Crampton instead of me, cradling her waist like a drunken fool.
He wasn't watching when I brushed against Ryan and felt his hot breath on my neck. I knew it was wrong, but I continued, bathing in heat and light I could understand.
Was it worth the beating I had coming now?
Yes, a small part of my mind whispered. You're a grown woman, Cassie. Twenty years old. Plenty ready to be a wife to a man like Ryan, a man whose very touch makes you tingle like nothing else.#p#分页标题#e#
I shrugged away a sheepish smile. Too slow for him to miss it, even while he was drunkenly half-focused on the road.
“Whore! You're thinking about him now, aren't you?”
Blushing hurt, especially when he was totally right. His power to read minds through his drunken rage has always been awesome and scary. Even after all these years alone with him and Heather, I still don't have a clue how to handle my father, how to escape his wrath...
“It was a mistake,” I said weakly. “It won't happen again.”
He knew it was a pathetic lie, an excuse, and so did I. I didn't regret anything about the way our bodies melded. When Ryan leaned in and brushed his lips over mine, hooking me to his chest just a little tighter, I knew damned well it was a sin.
Just as much a sin as the feelings I got alone in the darkness, whenever my fingers wandered beneath my gown and crept up my thigh, straight to the soaked, steaming mess between my legs.
“Bringing you out here was the damned mistake,” Daddy snapped. “Half the heads in the congregation were watching by the time I ripped you away. Do you know how hard it'll be to live this down? Half this town already thinks I'm nothing but a fucking drunk and a grease monkey.”
I know. And I don't care.
Daddy stared at me, taking his eyes off the road, as if he could hear the sarcasm hidden in my brain. He bared his teeth.
“Mark my words, Cassie. I will straighten your ass out. You're not too old for my discipline until you're another man's problem.” He paused, inhaling a hot, angry breath. “Now I wonder if that day will ever come. No man in his right mind would want you for a wife. Not after today.”