Love Me for Me(46)

“Then what do you want, Libby? Do you even know?”

Her life seemed to be closing in on her just like it had day after day since she’d come back, and she felt the sting of tears in her eyes. Being near him was messing with her mind. She couldn’t think straight with all the old feelings coming back relentlessly. But the truth of the matter was that it was probably only an initial attraction because of their history. They couldn’t be happy together. They were too different. Angrily, she wiped a runaway tear with the back of her hand. She did know what she wanted. Her mind went to the email on her phone. Right then, it seemed like everything rested on that email, and as soon as she left Pete’s, she was going to follow up.

She didn’t want to think about Pete and Pop, or Nana’s mystery letter anymore, or the fact that she’d not be able to see Jeanie and Helen on a regular basis. None of it mattered because it was all too painful to think about anyway. Why did she need all of this in her life? She’d been perfectly happy in New York and, until recently, things were uncomplicated there.

“I didn’t mean to make you cry,” Pete said, still dripping wet.

The complete absurdity of it made her laugh.

“What?” he asked, a perplexed look on his face.

The feel of tears still present, she tipped her head back and laughed again. She was losing it.

“What is wrong with you?”

“Everything here is so weird,” she giggled and sniffled at the same time. “Look at you! And why do people hang tires from trees anyway?”

He chuckled but looked down at the sand as if searching for something.

Then she sobered a little. None of this was his fault at all. He couldn’t help that she was a mess. He’d only been trying to loosen her up like she’d mentioned. He knew her feelings and had been a good friend, just like she’d wanted.

“Well, if you find everything so weird here, maybe you should hurry back to New York.” He turned away from her, walking closer to the waves. His back to her, he picked up a shell and skipped it on the water, watching the place where it went under for longer than normal. Libby knew exactly how he felt because she felt it too. Maybe she should’ve followed her brain instead of her heart and not asked him on a walk. It was easier said than done.





Chapter Sixteen





Libby held the steamer she’d rented from Wentworth’s against the kitchen wall with one hand while she attempted to reach the putty knife with the other. She fingered it and pulled it toward her, stretching her arms in opposite directions, sliding on the drop cloth beneath her feet, until she had the putty knife in her grasp. Removing the steamer, she scraped the wall to rid it of the old kitchen wallpaper. It was a slow process and she’d been at it for a good part of the morning, and about half the kitchen paper had been removed. The only benefit to stripping wallpaper was that it gave her time to think about all the things she had on her mind.

She’d set up an interview with Riddick Wiesner in New York. The interview was on the Friday before Trish’s bridal shower, at the end of the month. Taxes would all be in by then and work would slow down a little, so she didn’t feel too terrible about asking off that day. She’d set it all up the minute she’d gotten home from Helen’s party.

She had enjoyed the rest of the party. As expected, the crowd gawked at Pete when they walked up from the beach. Jeanie had yelled, “Libby finally hit her limit and pushed you in, didn’t she?” Everyone laughed, and Pete never gave a straight answer. He went in and changed, and once he returned, the chatter about it died down. The worst thing was that Pete was very quiet the rest of the party, and he stayed far enough away from her, that they didn’t have another conversation the rest of the day.

Why couldn’t they just be friends? She knew why, but it didn’t stop her from asking herself the question. She wanted to try and be friends, though. She wanted to be able to stop by and say hello when she came home for a visit; she wanted to text him when something funny happened; she wanted to see his smile again. She wasn’t letting that go. Perhaps, if she could just keep the conversation light, being friends could work.

Libby had spent most of the remaining time at the party with her mother and Jeanie. Surprisingly, Celia hadn’t said a whole lot about her new job with Marty or New York after that original discussion, thank goodness. Probably because Jeanie already knew most of the details and everyone else had been occupied in other conversations. After a few more glasses of wine, more birthday toasts, and some great songs, Libby had politely made her exit. She’d left when Pete was talking to someone, so she’d waved in his direction. It occurred to her that perhaps she should have waited, but she really just wanted to get home.