Reading Online Novel

Lost in Silence (The Lost Series Book 1)(47)



Since then, I didn’t bother getting serious with anyone. There wasn’t a point. I wasn't good enough for anyone anyways. Not with all the darkness inside. My love was a curse.

I was too caught up in my thoughts to notice her writing. It wasn’t until she places the pad of paper down in front of me that I see it.

You’re love is not a curse. Preacher didn’t die because you loved him. You don't really believe that Hudson, do you?

My heart clenches with sadness.

“Yes, I do."

Is his passing the reason Bear is dark too?

“Bear’s complicated,” I explain but it isn’t my place to discuss Bear’s issues. She nods and asks no more about him or Preacher.

What happened to your ex-wife?

“I don’t know.”

Liar.

She's right about my lie. I did know but only because I’m not a complete asshole. Most wouldn’t care where their ex’s landed and as much as I’d like to think I was one of them, it's just not who I am.

“She’s in prison,” I breathe. “Enough about her though, would you like to stop for some dessert on the drive home?”

She nods and tries to pull back her hand but I don’t let her. Instead, our eyes meet and warmth fills my heart, spreading through my body like wildfire. This night has been monumental for me. I’ve never allowed anyone in this deep and I knew doing so would change things between us. I couldn't ignore my feelings for her because this woman moved me in a way I never saw coming. I felt freer in a sense and more determined to help her find the same relief. I wanted to free her from the darkness holding onto her too.

“Alice, I’m here for you. I’m not going anywhere,” I run the pad of my thumb across her knuckles. “I want to help you, please, let me in.”

Her face falls, her shoulders sag and I can see the tears gather in her eyes, glistening in her chocolate pools. I can see the struggle on her face, she wants to open up but she is afraid. I know it won’t be tonight so I stand, pulling her up with me and I wrap my arms her, breathing in her scent.

She’ll be worth it….you’re in love with her.

Fuck, if I can fight those two statements any more.

She is worth it and I just might be in love with her.





Chapter 16


Alice

Losing my voice was a pivotal moment during my captivity. It signified the instant Erik gained absolute control over me and while I fought it with every last breath, he was stronger. Silence has been my life for the last six years. I’ve learned to live in it, survive through it, even love it at times. I’ve grown accustomed to it and I know what to expect of it. Over the years I’ve learned a great deal about myself through it. Most cannot handle the truth they find in its presence.

The silence I share with Hudson is unlike any silence I have ever experienced. It’s peaceful, comfortable and most of all needed. Not for me. For him.

I know he is reflecting right now, everything he’s shared with me is running through his mind. I can see it flicker across his face. He wants to freak out, he wants to pull away from me but with everything out on the table, he’s lost his shield to do it. I know he steered away from the subject of his ex-wife, only telling me the things I need to know. If he never tells me about his marriage, I don’t think I’d mind.

I can’t help seeing him in a different light. Knowing everything he’s been through and everything he’s overcome only makes me appreciate him more. I don’t pity him for any of it. I do feel for him. He’s experienced so much heart break in his life. It’s amazing he still finds the kindness in his heart to help someone like me.

This night didn’t go the way I planned. I was supposed to pull away from him, give him the excuse he needed to turn me away. Instead, he stopped me and gave me what truth he could handle giving me. He broke down the boundaries I put up against him. All this night has done is made me fall harder for him.

His words sat with me the whole drive home. I wanted to open up to him, share my story, my darkness, but I couldn’t. Something kept me from opening my mouth and saying the words.

His phone pings quietly, breaking the silence in the cab but he ignores it. It pings again and again and again. He pulls it out of his pocket and glances down at the screen.

“Shit,” the word bounces around the cab and fear strikes my heart. I touch his arm and he glances over at me. He punches a few buttons on his phone and holds it up to his ear. I can hear it ring. “Missy’s place has been broken into.”

*****

Hudson

I couldn’t think about anything except getting to Missy’s place as I accelerated around the corner, three blocks away. Someone had broken into her house tonight and according to my brief talk with King, she walked in on the intruder. She was alright but anything could’ve happened.