Living in Shadow(69)

“Yeah, but by that stage I was too important to them to punish.”

“What did you do for them?”

“I could translate English, and I was good at strategizing and planning. Plus, I was much better educated than some of the village boys and that was useful to them too.”

Another silence fell.

“What about the stars?” Her fingers traced up his forearms.

“Because they were cold. Peaceful. And I wanted some of that on me.”

“What about the tiger? Though I have to say, it’s a little cheesy.”

He found himself smiling, and that was weird too, considering where those tattoos had come from. Maybe it was the gentle amusement in her voice that did it. “I was drunk at the time. At least the guy who did that could draw. I was…sixteen, I think? We’d just won a major battle and since our squad was called the White Tigers, I thought it would be great if we all got a tiger tat.”

“The White Tigers, huh?”

“Yeah, I know. Hey, we were young.”

Another silence fell as she touched him, her hands like soft rain moving over his body. “I want to help, Luc,” she said after a moment.

“What do you mean?”

“What happened to you wasn’t fair. It wasn’t…just. And I know I can’t do anything about that now, but I think you were right when you said you wanted to do something for people like you. Well, I want to help. I want to get into human rights law, start making a difference.”

He shifted, twisting to look down at her, searching her face. “What? You mean give up teaching?”

Passion and determination burned in her eyes, along with a healthy dose of anger. “Maybe not completely. I could still teach part time, because I do like it. But I think together we could make a great team.”

He smiled, warmth spreading out in his chest. “Are you certain?”

“I’ve never been so sure of anything in my life.” She touched his cheekbone in a gentle caress. “I’m going to be here for you, Luc. And that’ll include being here when you get the help you need.” She paused. “Did you ever get any psychological help after you were rescued?”

He sighed. “Some. But I really wasn’t interested in what they were trying to do at the time, to be honest. And I was very good at telling them the things they wanted to hear, because I didn’t want to deal with it.”

“Yeah, I can imagine. But I think you should try seeing someone again.”

He knew that already. He couldn’t afford another flashback, and if that meant dealing with all the shit he knew was waiting for him, all the pain, then he’d have to do it.

It was hard to realize that. Hard to understand that if he wanted a future with her, he was going to have to open himself up to his emotions. Open himself up to the pain of all he’d forgotten.

So, yeah, nothing about this was going to be easy. But the choice itself was not so difficult. He wanted her and she was worth any price he had to pay.

He turned his head, kissing her fingers. “I know and I will. As long as you’re there, I can handle it.”

“It won’t be easy, honey.”

“Yeah, I know that too.”

She sighed. “You’ll get through it. You’re amazingly strong.”

“So are you, Professor. So are you.”

“Uh, I’m not your professor anymore.”

He smiled. “What else am I going to call you?”

Her fingers trailed along his jaw then down the side of his neck, stroking his throat. “You can call me Sir, of course.”

He laughed. “Oh, I don’t think so. If anyone’s going to be Sir, it’s me.”

Her hand drifted lower. “Call me your sun. I’m happy with that.”

“Mon rayon du soleil. You never were anything else.”

Because now he was in sunlight, there were no shadows. No shadows anywhere.





About the Author

Jackie has been writing fiction since she was eleven years old. Mild-mannered fantasy/SF/pseudoliterary writer by day, obsessive romance writer by night, she used to balance her writing with the more serious job of librarianship until a chance meeting with another romance writer prompted her to throw off the shackles of her day job and devote herself to the true love of her heart—writing romance. She particularly likes to write dark, emotional stories with alpha heroes who’ve just got the world to their liking, only to have it blown wide apart by their kick-ass heroines.

She lives in Auckland, New Zealand, with her husband, the inimitable Dr. Jax, two kids, two cats and some guppies (possibly dead guppies by the time you read this). When she’s not torturing alpha males and their stroppy heroines, she can be found drinking chocolate martinis, reading anything she can lay her hands on, posting random crap on her blog or being forced to go mountain biking with her husband.