I cry out, clutching his arms.
He pulls out and drives back in, fucking me hard and fast. He’s grunting against my mouth, his fingers are biting into the flesh on my ass and my pussy is convulsing around him. He fucks me like this is our last day on earth, as if he’ll never see me again. Maybe he won’t. Maybe that’s reality. I cry out his name when he tilts my hips, driving in so deep it almost hurts. But he finds that spot—that amazing, sensitive spot.
“Oh God,” I cry. “Nate.”
He growls against my neck as I begin to come around him, my orgasm ripping through me like a hurricane, sending me over the edge. I don’t care who hears or who sees—I let myself go, I let every feeling in. He follows soon after, growling his release into my mouth as he slams his lips over mine again. His cock jerks as he empties himself into my aching flesh.
Then I’m on the ground and he’s pulling out, taking a few steps backwards and running his hands through his hair. I can see regret and my heart tears apart all over again. “Fuck,” he roars, jerking his jeans up. “Fuck.”
“Nate, I . . .” I whisper.
He spins and glares at me, so angry, so wild, that I flinch. Why is he mad at me? He kissed me. I coil backwards and my entire body shakes as I see that all too familiar regret in his eyes.
“Don’t you ever, ever fuckin’ come near me again. Do you hear me, Avery? Leave. Leave me the fuck alone.”
His words are like a slap to the face. I watch, my entire body numb as he disappears, leaving me alone. I slowly crumble to my knees, my fingers running through the fresh dirt on the ground as I break. I finally break. I scream his name, clawing at the ground, desperate and pathetic. Alone and used.
He said he I wasn’t a toy—he was wrong.
That’s all I am.
~*~*~*~
NATE
What have I done? What have I fuckin’ done?
I fucked her and then I watched as I ripped her heart out a second time.
I don’t deserve this. I don’t deserve her.
I don’t deserve anything.
CHAPTER 31
AVERY
“I can do this,” I say to Maggie and Lyn, as I walk through the halls to the dressing room.
“Avery, you don’t have to. The girls can do it without you.”
“I’ve practiced,” I protest, though my voice is emotionless. “I’m helping them with this concert.”
Both women look at each other, then back to me. They nod but I can see both don’t want me on that stage. The girls need me, though; it’s their end-of-year concert, and they’ve been excited about this. I’m the main dancer in their set, and if I don’t join in they will be let down. I won’t let them down.
“Avery!” they cry when I step out into the back dressing room.
“Who’s ready?” I say, putting on my best fake smile.
“Yeah!”
I run through the routine with them once more before making sure they’re all dressed, their hair is done and they’re ready to go. When the concert starts, I prepare myself to go on stage. I’ll be doing an introduction dance and then they will join me. The moment my name is called, I take a deep breath and step out. I can see Kelly and Liam in the crowd, and my heart warms that they’ve come to watch me.
I move across the stage, doing the routine we practiced. I dance and twist, gliding as best I can. When the girls join me, I smile as they perform beautifully. Moms and dads cheer, and people clap when the girls do amazing little moves. I beam with pride, knowing I taught them that. I glide off the stage when it comes to my best ten-year-old’s solo. I catch a glimpse of Max before I go, talking closely with Liam. He must have just arrived.
I wonder what they’re talking about? Max is glancing down at his phone, then back to Liam. Then I hear the shrill sound of it ringing before he takes the call. I can’t focus too much more, because I really have to make sure this concert ends smoothly. Max disappears mid way through my performance, and my heart sinks a little.
By the time it’s my turn to close the concert, Liam is gone – only Kelly remains. My heart kicks up a notch as I try desperately to pay attention to my dancing. I’m mid-way through my performance when Max returns, without Liam. He stares up at me, and I watch him as I lean down and then jump. It’s in that moment I see his face, really see his face and I know . . . instantly I know. He has that look, the look people have when they’re about to tell you someone is dead.
I crumble on the stage, my legs giving way beneath me.
I land harshly, and the crowd goes silent. I lift my eyes and stare at Max again, and I see the exact moment a tear rolls down his cheek. Suddenly I can’t hear anything but white noise. My vision blurs as I feel arms wrapping around me and lifting me. I’m dragged off the stage and pulled out the back, but I’m still staring at nothing.