“You okay?” I ask Nate as we walk.
“Yeah,” he mutters.
I don’t want to push—I don’t know him well enough.
“Okay,” I whisper.
He sighs and then says, “She was passed out.”
I look at him out of the corner of my eye. “Your wife?”
“Yeah. Macy was in the kitchen, at the sink, washing. She had a knife in her hand, Avery. A fuckin’ knife. She was trying to make me dinner because her mother was out cold.”
Oh God. My heart aches for him. I can’t imagine how scared he must have felt.
“I’m sorry,” I say, not knowing what else there is to add.
“She’s been drinking lately. I feel like it’s my fault.”
“How so?” I ask, keeping my eye on Macy.
“I’m away a lot. She always has Macy, never having a break. Have I driven her to this?”
I think about my answer, not wanting to insult his wife but at the same time wanting to make him feel better.
“You’re providing for your family. I’m not saying it’s easy; I’ve not been your wife or lived your life, but the way I see it . . . when you choose to have a child, you understand that your world will change. Kids are full on—perhaps she could look into finding a carer a few days a week? Maybe that will help her catch up?”
He shakes his head. “Maybe. I don’t know. She doesn’t seem to be coping and I can’t help but wonder if it’s my fault.”
“Have you spoken to her about it?”
“No,” he says, rubbing a hand over his face. “We just end up in a fight. I get mad at her. I was so fucking mad tonight, I stormed out with Macy.”
“It was probably for the best,” I say gently. “It will give you time to cool down.”
“I was hard, Dancer. I put my hands on her and it was rough.”
I swallow and stop, turning to him. “Did you hurt her?”
“No, but . . .”
I take his hand, feeling the rough skin on his palms graze against mine. “Then you can’t blame yourself. You made a mistake, yes, but you walked out and stopped it. If you keep blaming yourself, you won’t find the root of the problem and you won’t be able to fix it.”
His eyes scan my face and they warm. “I’m sure I met you for a reason.”
I laugh softly. “To give you advice?”
He grins, but his eyes are dead serious. “No. To give me a friend. I really need a friend, Dancer.”
My heart melts and emotions flood my body. “Well,” I whisper, “I’m glad I have a friend too.”
We’re staring at each other. Really staring. My body is aware of him, my heart is turning to liquid and I feel the need to step back. I shouldn’t be so close. Shouldn’t be building a relationship with him so quickly. Friendship should be done slowly, yet with us it seems to come effortlessly.
“Daddy, look!”
We both snap out of it and turn quickly to Macy who is holding up a gorgeous, yellow rose.
“That’s real pretty, baby,” he says, smiling down at her.
“Do you like roses?” she asks me, showing me the flower.
I kneel down. “I love them. I have my very own rose garden at home.”
“Can I see it?” she cries.
“Perhaps one day you can.”
I look up at Nate, whose jaw is tight and every now and then it tics. He’s really down tonight, and I don’t know him well enough to be able to make that better or offer the right advice, but I can try and make him happier.
“Look,” I say, pointing over the road. “There’s the ice cream shop.”
Macy looks over and squeals with delight, then she takes Nate’s hand and pulls him with full force towards the shop. We get ice cream and Nate offers to walk me the few extra blocks to my house. By the time we get there, Macy is looking sleepy, her face covered in ice cream. I turn to Nate.
“Thank you for tonight.”
He smiles, but it’s distant and distracted. “No, thanks for keeping us company. Maybe we can catch up soon?”
I get to my front gate and turn to him, smiling.
“Maybe.”
CHAPTER 5
NATE
“I’m so sorry,” Lena sobs, her hands fisted in my shirt.
I’m trying to forgive her, trying to see both sides to this story. Maybe she is the way she is because of me; maybe my career is ruining my family. Maybe I’m not giving her what I used to give her.
“It’s done with,” I bite out, trying to calm my voice.
“You’re still angry at me¸” she whispers, looking up at me, tears running down her cheeks.
“I’m disappointed and you’re going to have to give me time, but I’m not angry.”