“So the accident?” Pete asked.
“Exactly like I told you. It’s possible that his reflexes played a part in the accident, but the medical examiner couldn’t determine that one hundred percent.” Jo didn’t offer any other information and neither Lex nor Pete asked. Lu felt stunned, much as she imagined the boys feeling when they read their letters. How could she have missed this?
“Mom, why didn’t you tell us when he died?” Pete looked forlorn, hurt. Willa moved closer to him, as though her presence could absorb the bad and leave him with nothing but the good. Lu watched the two of them, envy spurting out of her pores. She longed to comfort Lex.
“I probably should have, but he was dead. Not that I didn’t think it mattered. That’s not it. It wouldn’t have changed anything.” Jo continued to sit twirling her glass, looking off into a distance that no one else could see. Lu couldn’t help her slight hero worship of Jo. She didn’t apologize to the Lex and Pete, knowing that there wasn’t much she could say to help them understand their father’s motivations. They all knew Mr. P. well enough to know that Jo’s version was dead-on. And while she probably should have told them when he died, she didn’t try to convince them that her decision was right—it was merely her decision. She looked at both men. “Would it have made it easier?” she asked, wanting to know if she’d messed up.
Pete shrugged. “I don’t know,” he admitted.
Lex turned his head to face his mother. “There isn’t anything that could have made Dad’s death easier. But I would have liked to know that we didn’t have all the time in the world.” He stood and kissed his mother on her head. “I called the car service on my way in here. They should be here in five. We’ll see you tomorrow.” He left the room without another word. Chris, Amber, and Jo stood and gathered their stuff.
“I’ll walk you out,” Pete offered.
When it was just the two of them in the room, Willa turned to Lu. “Are you going to check on him?”
Lu leaned back heavily in the chair. Sighing, she said, “Yes.”
“Are you going to be OK?”
Smiling wearily, Lu rolled her eyes to the ceiling. “My heart can’t break twice, right?”
Willa merely smiled.
41
Lex stood on the balcony, staring out into the depths of the Alboran Sea. If one wanted to put the insignificance of their problems in perspective, they merely needed to look at the infiniteness of its sparkling depths. Bombarded by the events of the last eight months, Lex found himself smiling. The loss of his father would never leave him. He would feel it every day, but he also imagined that the sharpness would lessen so that the dull ebb would merely be a passing thought. Coupled with the discovery of his daughter, the scales seemed to somehow balance. What, he wondered, would it have been like to have them both at the same time? And Lu. What would it be like to have Lu?
As if he’d conjured her with his thoughts, he heard the door open and knew, without looking back, that she’d come to him. He turned and leaned back on the balcony railing, watching her stride purposefully toward him. She still wore her black slacks and forest green sweater, a testament to Christmas. She’d pulled her hair out of its ponytail so that it hung loosely around her shoulders. Last night, when he’d gone to her, her eyes had been red-rimmed and swollen, tiny red lines mixing with the white and blue, proclaiming her heart-wrenching trip to the past. Tonight, the cornflower blue sparkled, almost smiling, meeting his with a quiet determination that he’d always associated with her. He couldn’t really imagine her broken and doubting like the seventeen-year-old girl she’d described. The woman walking toward him was the girl he’d loved, all grown up and magnificent. He wanted her—more than he’d wanted anything.
He smiled, his eyes mischievous, and her step faltered. Slight, a slighted stutter, as if she all of a sudden realized what she had walked into and his grin widened.
Suddenly, she laughed.
Raising his eyebrow, Lex copped the stare. “What’s so funny?” he teased.
Not hesitating anymore, she stepped right between his parted legs, wrapped her arms around him and laid her forehead on his chest. She giggled. “Here I thought I was coming in here to check on you, but you don’t seem to be very upset.”
His arms snaked around her, and he pulled her close. He shrugged, causing her to lift her head and meet his eyes. “Seeing you makes me smile.” Sincerity laced his words and made her draw a deep breath.
Lex’s hands moved slowly, caressing Lu’s back, mesmerizing her. When she looked away from him, he leaned back, trying to get her to look up at him again. She felt so good in his arms, but he didn’t want to scare her away. She reminded him of a skittish colt, and the last thing he needed was to make her bolt. She finally met his gaze. He smiled again.