“It’s OK, Amber. She’s not saying anything I don’t know. And I bet she’s been sitting on this for a long time.” Jo never took her eyes off of Lu. Inclining her head, she granted Lu permission to continue.
Bitch, thought Lu. I’m reprimanding them and she’s giving me permission.
“I’m doing this my way. That’s what I came over here to tell you. Although I was going to tell you all separately, before you ambushed me.”
“Lu, we knew you’d come when you’d figured out what you wanted to do. This wasn’t an ambush.”
“It’s neither here nor there,” she said waving away her mother’s comment with her hand. “Sky is on her way here with Nina. Nina won’t be at the funeral. I haven’t even told her about Grampa Mike because I didn’t know how.” She paused, hating that she hadn’t been able to sit down with Nina before she’d had to rush here. “I’m not going to share much more than this with you. What I do today is what I think is best for Nina and Lex. I haven’t asked for your opinions about it because I’m not sure that I care.”
Angry and surprised by her anger, Lu took another moment. She turned away from them. How is it that I didn’t realize that I held them responsible? she thought. Trying to get a grip on her anger, she walked to the edge of the patio and looked out into the dawn. The possibilities of the dawn. Her mother could probably quote great works of literature that paid tribute to the new beginnings promised at the start of each day. But as Lu looked out over the horizon, she only saw endings for her. Lex could get a beginning. She was going to do everything in her power to ensure that he got the endless possibilities today. And Nina would get a beginning. Lu smiled at the thought of Nina and Lex discovering each other. They would fascinate each other. But she only saw dusk for herself. She would once again feel the loss of Lex. How was it possible that she had to experience that earth-shattering loss twice in her lifetime? And she was forced to admit that she would lose some of Nina today. It wouldn’t be the two of them against the world anymore. She would have to share her daughter. Another loss. And she would be saying good-bye to Mike Pellitteri. Mr. P., who had sensed the depth of her loss because he had lost too on that day so long ago. Her heart ached. And her anger bubbled. It was then that she knew she was losing her parents too. Because quite suddenly, she wasn’t sure that she would be able to forgive them.
Turning back to the three friends, knowing there should also be a fourth, Lu moved toward them again. “I’m doing this my way. I’m making it up to the seventeen-year-old girl whose destiny was chosen for her. You are not to interfere.” She met the eyes of each of them. She saw their reluctant acceptance. She drew herself up, and as a parting shot she looked back on them. “You better hope that Lex and Nina find a way to connect. Because if my daughter gets hurt in any way, I am holding the three of you personally responsible.”
As Lu made her way off the deck, silence descended again. Before Jo could stop it, laughter rippled through her. She looked at Amber and Chris, her dearest friends.
Amber was clearly horrified. She sat stunned, ripped open by the vehemence of Lu’s anger. Although it was justified, Lu had never given them any reason to believe she was that angry with them. She looked over at Chris, wondering if the bewilderment she was feeling was the same for him. Chris looked just as stunned as she felt.
“I never thought she was so angry with us,” Amber said as she got up and walked to where Chris was sitting. She knew this was a conversation they needed to have privately, but she couldn’t contain her thoughts.
Chris shook his head. “I don’t know. We probably should have known. She’s always been good at letting you think you know what’s going on in her head. She’s too damn smart.”
“Think about her holding that in for this long.”
“I don’t think that’s what’s going on, Amber. I think she just realized how mad she is. Everything coming down on her with no warning. She’s striking out and we’re convenient.”
“Think there is any way that today can end well?” she asked, rhetorically.
Chris chose not to answer.
Jo remained silent, lost in her own thoughts. Listening but not really listening. Letting them deal with their family as she knew she would have to deal with hers today. If Lu was this angry, she couldn’t imagine Lex’s wrath. It took a lot to get Lex mad. In fact, she couldn’t really remember a time when he let anger rule him. He had always found a way to laugh things off. Even on the field, no one ever got the best of him. The most popular descriptions of Lex were words like mischievous, fun-loving, irreverent. Intense usually played into it too, but no one could claim to have ever seen Lex angry. Jo worried she would see it today though. Today, she would see a side of Lex Pellitteri that no one had ever seen.