Left Behind(12)
Allie takes out a brown paper bag with a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in it, giving me some relief. Aunt Claire packed me a lunch too. I had wondered if I’d be the only one.
We eat lunch quickly, with Allie chattering away about the project and how Mr. Davis runs his class. The period actually flies by as we talk. There’s an easy flow to our conversation and I have to remind myself I’m not here to get involved with anything or anyone. I need to keep focused on my goal. I’m here to find my sister.
The bell rings, signaling it’s time to head to another room of clones. Allie asks for my cell phone number so she can text me about meeting at the library tonight to pick a topic for our literature circle project. I’m embarrassed to tell her that I don’t know my own phone number. I’ve never even held an iPhone until this week, I’m not sure I can figure out how to add a contact quickly. Thinking fast, I hand her my new phone and say, “Here, call yourself on my phone— it’s faster.” She does and leaves me with a smile and wish of luck for the rest of my classes.
***
After school, I head out the front doors to look for Aunt Claire. I had told her not to take another day off work, that I could find my way home. If only she knew that I’d moved eight times since grade school, the constant changes leaving me with a better sense of direction than the GPS in her Honda CRV. I’ve refrained from telling her too much about my life with Mom. She always looks sad when I mention any of our troubles and I don’t want anyone’s pity.
I survey the line of expensive cars in front of the school, looking for Aunt Claire’s Honda. A chill crawls up my spine, raising the tiny hairs on the back of my neck, even though it’s almost ninety and there is no breeze. I turn, an eerie feeling of being watched, and scan the area. Nothing is behind me. Nothing to the right. Turning left, I freeze, finding a woman staring at me fixedly. She’s just standing there. Alone. Staring. Our eyes lock for a moment. She looks out of place. Her elegant cream-colored suit and two-tone high heels just don’t fit in. The teachers dress nice — I learned that today. But not this nice. She doesn’t turn away even though I’ve caught her staring. Oddly, I feel like she’s staring, yet doesn’t see me.
A car horn catches my attention, breaking the pull I feel toward the woman. “Do you know that woman?” I ask as I slide into Aunt Claire’s car.
“What woman?”
I look back to where she was just standing, but she’s gone. No sign of her anywhere. It’s hard to imagine she could disappear so quickly in those heels. “She was standing over there a minute ago.” I point toward the tree the woman stood under.
“I only see a bunch of students. What did she look like?”
“I don’t know. I guess it was a parent. Maybe she thought she knew me or something.” I shrug, feeling silly that I’d even mentioned it. Sometimes I think maybe I inherited Mom’s paranoia.
Aunt Claire peppers me with questions about my day. Did I make any friends? Did I like my classes? Did I think the work was the right level? How were the teachers? Did I eat the lunch she’d packed?
I guess she eventually spots my discomfort. “I’m sorry, Nikki. I have to remind myself that you’re a high school senior and not a ten year old. I hope I didn’t sound like I was trying to mother you too much.”
Stopping myself just short of telling her that Mom didn’t “mother” the way she thought, I decide to feed her inquisition instead of going down the serious road. “Don’t worry about it.” I smile halfheartedly. “I think I made a new friend today. Her name is Allie and we’re going to be on the same team for an English project. In fact, she asked me to meet the group at the West Long Beach library tonight. Do you know where that is? Can I go?”
Aunt Claire can’t hold back her enthusiasm. “Of course you can go. I’m so happy you made a friend. I was worried. This is such a big change for you.”
“I know. And thank you.” It’s not going to be difficult to remember to try to please Aunt Claire so she’ll continue to let me stay. She just makes it come naturally.
***
The library has always been my sanctuary. A place I’d go to escape the reality of my often screwed-up existence. Back in Texas, I’d spend hours alone in the stacks, sitting on the floor flipping through old books, the smell of musty paperbacks strangely comforting— different than the smell of must in our old trailer.
Allie waves to me excitedly from the long table as soon as I walk in, her smile contagious. I’d stood outside a few minutes before coming in, seriously debating on whether or not to go inside. After the long day of firsts, I wasn’t sure I was ready for any more. But seeing Allie actually looking happy to see me somehow quells my fear.
“Hey, this is Cory and Keller,” Allie says, introducing me to the others already seated at the table. Both look vaguely familiar. I must have seen them in English class today, but after taking in a thousand new faces, I’m a bit too overwhelmed to remember much about any single person.
It takes less than three minutes sitting at the table, before the group dynamic is clear. Keller Daughtry looks like a linebacker, an intimidating one. I wouldn’t be surprised if he growled instead of spoke. He’s broad and muscular, with short, cropped hair and loads of bite in everything he says. But it’s the kind of sarcastic wit that’s said with a grin, and the group looks like they enjoy poking the lion almost as much as he enjoys delivering the lashing. Cory is the quiet one of the trio. She smiles and laughs, taking in the exchanges among the group rather than jumping into the middle.
“So what’s your story?” Keller asks, bending back his chair on its hind legs, his arms folded over his chest.
“My story?” I know what he’s asking, yet the question catches me off guard.
“Yeah. You know, where’d you move from? You play any sports? Is Allie going to have to carry your ass in this project too, like she does mine?” Keller shrugs. “Your story.”
All eyes turn to me. I do my best to feign casual, even though I’m anything but comfortable talking about my story. “Ummm…I moved here from Texas. I ran track at school. And I hope Allison doesn’t have to carry me.” Keller watches me intently, unsure what to make of what he sees, so, without thinking, I let who I am slip out to show him. Arching one eyebrow, I intentionally graze my eyes across the girth of him before I speak. “I’m not sure she can carry my ass, since she’s probably already suffocating under the weight of yours.”
Keller throws his head back and laughs. “You’re going to fit right in, although I’m not sure I can put up with another smartass in the group.”
We discuss our project choices until a little before the library closes, the hours passing more like minutes. Allie has a passion for reading that brings everyone into the story, even Keller, who I get the feeling isn’t always the greatest student.
Allie and I talk for a few minutes out front as I wait for my aunt. “So, you run track?”
“Yeah, you?”
She laughs. “Definitely not. I run like a duck. Running isn’t my thing. I played soccer for a little while when I was a kid. My dad really wanted a jock. With two girls, luckily my little brother came along and it took some of the pressure off us. I try to stick to sports that don’t entail running.” She pauses, then adds, “Zack runs track.”
“Your brother?” I ask with a furrowed brow.
“No. Zack’s the other person in our group.” She looks at me blankly for a second. “He plays football too.”
“Oh. Is he sick or something?” The minute the question leaves my mouth, Allie’s face changes. Sadness covers her usually sunny smile. I immediately regret asking the question.
She attempts to recover her smile, but fails to make it even slightly believable. “I’m hoping he comes back soon.”
Aunt Claire couldn’t have better timing as she pulls up, I’d stuck my foot in my mouth enough for one day.
Chapter 15
Zack—
Wednesday
I knew it was coming before my parents sat me down. It was only a matter of time. I was out of school the last few months after Emily died and then a whole summer passed. I think Mom and Dad were afraid to argue with me yesterday, when I said I wasn’t going for the first day of school, but they aren’t going to let this go any further— at least that’s what I overheard Dad saying to Mom after dinner. So tonight, they pulled the plug on my avoidance. Tomorrow is going to suck.
Rather than try to spend time convincing them that I should stay home, I decide to go for a run. I’ve been running a lot lately. Music blaring in my ears, feet pounding hard on the concrete beneath my feet, nothing else seems to clear my head. I take the new route I’ve been tracking, unable to bring myself to follow any of the paths that Emily and I usually ran. I slow as I reach the library. Allie’s car is outside. So is Keller’s. I’ve felt guilty about the way I spoke to her the night she came to see me. She was only trying to help. She’s texted me a few times since then, but I didn’t answer any of the texts. The only ones I’ve returned were a few of Keller’s, because I knew he would show up if I didn’t.