Last to Rise(96)

Perak stared at me, his face as pale as the snow that still piled up in the streets, wherever it could find a way through the warren of walkways and buildings and too many people squashed together. I wanted to say something to him too, but again I couldn’t think what and I needed to save my breath so all I said was, “Help me upstairs, Perak.”



He wavered, and I looked about at the statues and wondered, were the saints ever afraid? Did the martyrs crap themselves before they did what they’d done? Did they dream of Namrat coming to eat them?



And there, the statue of Namrat himself, his face covered with a black and gold cloth as was proper. I’m not sure what possessed me, to see the face of the thing that haunted me, but I pulled the black cloth off and let it drop. A hungry, snarling face, all eyes and teeth. Namrat always wins, in the end.



Perak got hold of my arm and without another word we made our way out of the temple, away from the silence, from the statues’ eyes, away from Namrat. It took a while to get to the lab – walking wasn’t getting any easier, and the snow had turned to slushy ice which coated the stairwell, the walkways, every available surface. The air seemed cold enough to snap my nose hairs, but I barely noticed.



We reached the level of the lab, the area where a huddle of dead Storad lay mercifully cloaked by the snow. It seemed quieter than graves. A faint sound echoed in the crystal air – the gates. They were fighting at the gates, in the streets, on the Spine. They’d all risen, but it wouldn’t be enough, not to beat them back for good. Because there was going to be more Storad, more machines. More everything, if we didn’t do something right now. Of that we could be sure.



“Rojan…” Perak’s voice, worried and small, like when we were boys and he looked up to me.



I shook my head – saving my breath, and the blood that seemed to float out in misty little droplets with it. I only wanted to say it once, and there was someone else who needed to hear it too.



A shout went up from behind the rough barricade, the door opened and light spilled out. Warm hands grabbed me and took me inside, set me down on a chair by Lise’s desk.



Perak crouched opposite me, while Erlat helped me sit up. Even that little thing was hard and I leaned against her, taking a bit of strength from her while she mopped at my face with a cool cloth that seemed like bliss.



“Rojan, what —” Perak said, but I shook my head at him. No words or breath spare to explain.



Instead I used them for Erlat. “Lise’s desk. Bottom drawer, at the back. Green.”



They both looked at me like I’d gone mad, and perhaps they were right, but Erlat went and got the vial and the syringe that went with it. For once I was going to voluntarily get a jab.



“Perak, open the door.” I nodded towards the room that I didn’t really want to see again, but had to.



“What? No, Rojan. I won’t allow it. I won’t.”



I levered myself up, and Erlat shifted under my shoulder so I could use her as a crutch. The room swam, colours blurring into black around me, but I managed to stay upright. Just.



“You don’t have a choice,” I said. “Why were you going to blow Top of the World?”



He looked bewildered at the change of tack, but I needed him to understand even if I didn’t.



“I – I —” He pulled himself together. “It’s not about the individual man. One man couldn’t change Ministry, not on his own, not for decades, unless I wanted to assassinate all the cardinals and… the opportunity presented itself. I could have sent Jake away, or tried to and then Top of the World would be empty except for me and the Storad. You gave me the idea, you and Allit when he saw them there, I knew what needed to be done. Take down the whole lot, Top of the World, Clouds, scour Ministry from the positions of power and start again. Most of the cardinals have gone to the Mishans, or tried, and frankly the tribes are welcome to them. I hope they find more use for them than I did. Top of the World is empty, Clouds is a ghost town, except for the Storad. I thought we could topple both, Ministry and Storad, only we can’t now. I thought you were going to blow it all up, not bring us down here. If you’d left me up there I could have rigged something, fixed the ignition switch. Could have blown the whole mess into the Slump. Why didn’t you leave me, why do this to yourself?”



I had to pause in my answer because more blood came up. If this carried on, I wasn’t going to have any blood left, but even that didn’t matter much.



“You’ve got a daughter, and she’s already without a mother. Even I wouldn’t make her an orphan if I could avoid it.” Little Amarie, whose kidnap had started this whole sorry mess. A niece I’d never met, who laid flowers at the feet of the saints and martyrs for me, who prayed for me. “Besides, it’s not just Top of the World, is it? Machines, down there. More Storad. On way. Just taking out Top of World not going to cut it. Open door. Big brother will sort it.”